Okay - time for some jokes....because we ALL need a laugh!!!

Why does it take 50 million sperm to fertilize one egg?
Because they won't ask for directions either!

How many infertility patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Screw in a lightbulb! Hmmm . . . do you think it might help?

You know you are trying to get pregnant when someone asks you today's date and you reply "Day 21" . . .

How can you tell if a man has a high sperm count?
You have to chew before you swallow (sorry if too much!)

How does a FS like his/her eggs?
Over 20mm!

Why did the FS cross the road?
Because there was an affluent, infertile woman in her 30s on the other side.

"Looteal" phase: The period of time between cycles when all of the insurance statements/doctor's bills come in from the beginning of the cycle. Also a time to save $$ for the upcoming cycle.

Hormonophobia - dread fear of saying the wrong thing to your wife when she is on fertility drugs

Pregtember - name of the month you hope to be pregnant by.

Multiple Dwarf Syndrome - a state caused by the ups and downs of fertility treatments, characterized by describing oneself as some combination of grumpy, sleepy, dopey, bashful, etc; especially effective descriptor if you include what we like to call the "alternative dwarves," such as horny, *****y, barfy, crampy, etc

Snow White Complex - the mental state following your careful examination of white undies and panty liners for indications of mucus or menstrual flow; any hint of red on white or confusing mucus signs gives you the absolute right to take on any or all of the emotions in the Multiple Dwarf Syndrome.

Hormotional - easily rattled emotional state brought on by hormone surges; especially symptomatic of women on fertility drugs