Totally freaking out about trying again after a m/c and my age!

[terry]

Miss B I'm 42 and am currently 17 weeks pregnant. I too used IVF and thought like you am I kidding myself and just wasting money. As you know it only takes one good egg yes there are more risks as you get older and lots of your eggs aren't as good. My last stim cycle produced 19 eggs and of those only 2 embryos made it to day 5 one of which I'm carrying now. Take your time and think about what you want to do don't sell yourself or your body short.

[juniper76]

I may be 6 years younger than you, but I'm a poor responder with IVF (likely DOR) and our m/c in January was due to Trisomy 18, so I share your fears. I carry them with me every day and I'm terrified that we will never give our daughter a sibling.

FWIW, our OB did not recommend PGD, but he did give us a copy of the chromosome testing report to give to our FS. Given my usual poor response and our low number of embryos (only 2 last time), I doubt we'd ever be able to do PGD anyway.

I will say though, that if 75% of embryos in that study were abnormal, that means 25% were normal! 25% is still a decent number. IVF boils down to luck. I've seen people given a 75% chance who get a BFN and people with a 2% chance take a baby home. If 75% have a problem, then I'll be praying that you get one of the 25%. It could happen!

[fionas]

Statistics are evil beasts and can completely do your head in. But to answer your question, no, I don't think you are kidding yourself. As someone else said, I think a 25% chance is actually pretty good in the whole scheme of things.

I have met women in their 40s who were completely pollyanna about the whole baby thing (single but cheerily saying that if the right person came along then they'd like a baby with absolutely no sense of urgency). I think they would do well to have a look at some stats and get a wriggle on.

In terms of positive stories - a friend of mine had a healthy baby at 44. I had a healthy baby at 41 and after convincing myself that there'd be something wrong at the 12 week scan, the stats actually came out phenomenally well. I know how scary they can be, I freaked myself out too.

Good luck!

[myturn]

And I should stop having a relationship with Dr Google.

as should we all..... but he still keeps popping back into our lives!!! I can't seem to get rid of him no matter how hard I push....

sweet pea - there's never harm in trying... and it's okay to be worried.... at some point you will make the decision to stop, but sounds like that's not just yet....

look after yourself.... and keep busy.... I find Dr Google is far less appealing when i have other things to do

[Miss.B]

Thanks again ladies I just have to close my eyes, cross everything and take the plunge I think. I know I haven't finished yet, but the stupid stats are just plain scary and making me squirm! Boo hoo to them