Working Mummies Support Group

**Astrid** · April 22nd, 2013, 12:25 PM

Probably 50/50 sharing the sick days. Really depends on who has unbreakable commitments at work or who may also be feeling unwell also. There are days where we share, or I might take the sick on into my work for an hour or so, then DH picks up to go home.

I did find with childcare only it was easier to work due to the hours. School, kinder and childcare is a nightmare to juggle. Sadly no after school care that is accessible. Waiting till next year when both girls are at school, will then need to have both at Vacation care (which DD2 seems so little for

)

wysiwyg: I would be more inclined to go permanent rather than contractor, just for the certainty of pay and knowing leave days are paid for. Even with permanent though, it pays to keep track of actual vs reported income through the year, as bonuses, pay rises and overtime can throw things out. I always overestimate a few grand to cover those.

**wysiwyg** · April 22nd, 2013, 01:23 PM

I think you are right Astrid permanent would be better if can wangle it - it sucked today leaving DS sick at home with DH when he wanted me (he has never napped for DH) and the decision had to be made on purely financial basis - if we were both permanent at least could take all factors into consideration (although as they get older the need for it to be me will decline I would think - DS is still BF and would have liked to be able to feed him while sick). I think once is next financial year will be easier as we get no CCB at moment even though within rates because we had CCB while I was looking for work and for DD while on mat leave so now I am effectively paying that back (a fact I hadnt quite grasped when calculating child care fees) - is a shame they don't treat it differently if you are returning to work after a child like they do with FTB B.

**wysiwyg** · May 2nd, 2013, 10:44 AM

You know the thing I hate about working most at moment - is having to wake the kids up and get them out of bed and dressed in this cold weather - they are so peaceful and snug - it seems so mean. Is funny the set patterns you have in your head, 7:00 is so fixed in my head as being appropriate time to get up, just need to convince myself that is perfectly fair to get them up at 6:30.

**crumpet** · May 2nd, 2013, 11:55 AM

i feel your pain, DD is terrified of the ducted heating at the moment and so DH doesnt put it on so she can sleep as long as possible before i wake her and dress her to get going.

we have had issues with child care and DD being bitten, its a long running issue and this week i was seriously considering why i was working, i just wanted to be home with my girl kowing she was safe and not at the risk of being bitten.

child care have moved her now after me putting in notice to remove her, its so annoying it takes so long for proper action to take place!

**wysiwyg** · May 2nd, 2013, 08:20 PM

Crumpet - that is awful about the biting, glad they have eventually done something. We seem to have avoided that although DD bit me tonight and I cried and she was so sorry but when I asked her why she did it and is generally having lots of strops at moment she said someone bit her at childcare but there are no marks and she didn't complain to anyone so think she is fibbing - although she has had bite marks before but has always said she has done them herself - kids eh who knows.

**crumpet** · May 3rd, 2013, 08:32 AM

we have been really lucky DD hasnt bitten anyone. the staff seem to think the 2 kids that have bitten her have been lacking communication skills so are hoping things improve when they can speak.

**Astrid** · May 3rd, 2013, 12:54 PM

The guilt still happens at school age. DD1 carries on that she misses me when she is at school, kind like blaming me for working, hard to get through to her that she would be going to school regardless of me working, it is just that I am less able to help during the day. Same with DD2 and her days at Kinder.

**phebee** · May 3rd, 2013, 02:34 PM

Can I join in? I work 2 days a week. I'm a Visiting Teacher of the Deaf and I was FT until about 8 weeks before DD was due, but I didn't need to take mat leave until about 3 weeks before thanks to school holidays

She took another 2 weeks to arrive so I had my longest school holidays ever! She's 14mo now and I've worked the last 3 months. The hardest thing I've found is trying to fit all my work into those 2 days. I just donor have enough time and usually end up doing work while she naps during the day (so housework suffers) or in the evenings (less time with DH). I'm so glad I only took on 2 days!

**wysiwyg** · May 3rd, 2013, 09:02 PM

Welcome phebee - sounds like an interesting job. I think most jobs you always end up needing more time than you have - even when full time I still managed to bring stuff home - although DH never brings stuff home - I think he is very good at saying 'No' - whereas I have a real need to do things properly and often find myself thinking would rather spend extra hour at home on this than leave it as it is, I find it very hard to detach from it. I used to hope that contracting instead of being a permanent employee would give me more distance from my job and not get so (I want to say emotionally attached but it is IT and logistics - so you can't really be emotionally involved with it) - so I will say entwined with it, but hasn't really made any difference.

**veus** · May 3rd, 2013, 11:42 PM

Welcome phebee! I'm with u, struggle to accomplish/feel productive with 2 days so end up doing albeit here and there. I keep forcing myself to remember this is DD's time. I try anyway.

**MummyNaomi** · May 17th, 2013, 09:08 PM

Today's the last day of my maternity leave. I'm totally gutted, teary and emotionally spent today. Back to full time work Monday. DH is off for the next 18 weeks on long service leave then I go part time in September.
I'll be popping in to chat with you guys if that's cool x

**peanutter** · May 18th, 2013, 09:14 AM

Hugs. That's a bit adjustment.

**wysiwyg** · May 18th, 2013, 09:08 PM

Hugs MummyNaomi, you think is harder this time leaving two or easier because you have done before?

**MummyNaomi** · May 18th, 2013, 10:18 PM

I think there are three reasons making it harder this time babe

1. I'm still Breastfeeding this time. DS had weaned months before so I didn't have that to consider

2. Yes, I am leaving 2 this time. I don't think it will affect DS so much, he is used to childcare and much more used to Dad doing things for him but I've barely been apart from DD since she was born

3. I also think that as this is my last maternity leave this is a factor. When I returned from having DS we were planning on another baby at some point. We have completed our family this time and although I am content with that it means now I will be working until retirement now. No big chunks of time with the kids. I guess I feel a sense of loss at that.

I wonder did others feel different returning to work for the second or subsequent time?

**wysiwyg** · May 18th, 2013, 10:28 PM

I wonder did others feel different returning to work for the second or subsequent time?

I had been looking for so long I was just excited to start so at the point of return didn't think much about it, but now am at work the feeling is different because I know this is it forever, last time I knew/hoped was just till had next baby and returning to work actually made me have DS a year earlier than had planned. I am thinking more long term these days and some of those thoughts are depressing.

**peanutter** · May 18th, 2013, 10:52 PM

Both times I returned to work after only a couple of months (9 weeks the first time, 8 weeks the second) and both my boys fed exclusively until 6 months, and comp fed until 10 months, so there was a lot of expressing!!

I work shocking hours, but it was just part and parcel of the arrangement.

I didn't find two any harder than one, but I always knew that I'd be going back to work - I never thought I'd be staying at home, so it wasn't upsetting the way it could have been otherwise ITMS.

I've been at my place of employment for 7.5 years, so I can take long service leave any time now, which is good to know. At my job, I'm allowed to take it in chunks of no less than one month, so I can have (in addition to my 4 weeks annual leave) a month long holiday every year for the next three years if I want.

Realistically, I'll probably wait until DS2 is a little older and then we'll go on two long trips.

When the boys are older, at school, and DH is working full time again I will probably try to work more family hours, to be regularly home for dinner and homework and special sports events and all those things

But for now, I'm focusing on quality as quantity isn't a readily available option.

**Frantelle** · May 19th, 2013, 07:09 AM

Pn I always thought that it was 10 years for long service?

**Astrid** · May 19th, 2013, 07:24 AM

Depending on which state you live in, you can acess prorate LSL at 7 years.

Mixed feelings second time around. Over joyed to had found a great job with great hours. Relieved to be finally bringing in money. Sad at leaving DD2 as she really is and was a home body mummy's girl. She really struggled with it. Excitement at getting to the next stage of our lives, where we could finally make long lasting decisions as our family was now done.