I am becomming increasingly depressed, but not because of the baby, but because of other things that are stressing me out in my life atm.

I suffered from post natal depression after the birth of my oldest daughter, and it took a long time to recover, and with baby number 4, i suffered from pre natal depression, that was associated with the pregnancy, which i saw a social worker for and took months to help resolve the issues.

This time, im not sure its classes as pre natal, as its not about the baby, but i can recognise the symptoms of me heading that way, i know its mainly due to stress, not driving and the pressure of getting my kids to dance and soccer now hubby is on night shift, the fact my son is going through terriable 3s etc, i vent on face book, but then get things from my mum and sis going on about what i put on face book, i put it there cause i have no where else to say it iykwim.

I cry almost every day, i start to feel horrid about myself, i feel like a failure as a parent, just little things start to pile up, and they build up so much, im affraid im going to burst.

I feel nausea from stress, guilt of not driving, of not keeping a perfect tidy house, of always having sad face book status, of not being a good friend, of being a crappy wife, i just want to be happy and enjoy this pregnancy!

I have a dr appointment at the hospital this thursday, so will request to see the social worker again, and hope to get this resolved, but in the meantime, not getting rid of the stress isnt going to help me get rid of my depression.

I feel numb somedays, and trying to talk to hubby, sometimes feels like it turns back on me and its my fault, i know he doesnt blame me, but not driving, it is stressful for him.