Smudgy - it sounds like you're having a tough time! I was a first time GD also (my dad has type II). My obs always said to me to remember that essentially it's a tug of war between your pancreas and your placenta. Sometimes no matter HOW well you eat, you'll end up on insulin, so don't starve yourself in the process, cos it sounds like you're going hungry which isn't good for either of you! Low BSL's because there's no food in you is not a long-term solution!
To make sure I was still eating enough for me and bubs I found this link quite useful for menu ideas and to make sure I was eating about the right amount: Gestational diabetes... Diabetes Australia - NSW there's a link half way down the page, " Healthy Eating for Gestational Diabetes Fact Sheet (PDF)".
I did end up on insulin and it wasn't as bad as I feared it would be. Also, they did tell me that I didn't have to freak out because of a few high levels in the first week or so when you're trying to get things sorted. incidentally one thing that guaranteed set my BSL's off was baked beans, even though everyone else found them good! Also, sometimes you can eat the same thing but get totally different readings - it's not your fault, it's just the hormones mucking with your insulin resistance.
Sounds like you're doing a great job, hang in there it WILL get better
Oh and re weight loss - I found I stopped gaining weight at all but didn't actually lose. My obs said he'd start being worried if I lost 5-10kg... but depending on your current weight your obs may or may not care. I'd suggest giving your DE a call if you can to talk through what's happening. And yes, what megan said is definitely true - make sure you have snacks, is really important!
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