Just a few details before I tell you my story, I'm 21, hubby is 24. My LMP was Aug 12, but my cycle is 35 days about. I have asthma and this is my first pregnancy.
I'm about 9 weeks pregnant, but had some very slight spotting over the last week, not continuously just occaissionally like every second or third day there'd be a small amount of sometimes brown sometimes red bloody discharge only when I wipe not enough to stain my knickers.
On Saturday evening, whilst visiting family, I passed a tiny clot, perhaps about 3mm, and got worried so the husband and i headed off to the local A+E where after seven hours waiting we were seen by a gynae doctor. After an determining that i wasn't dilated at all she performed a vaginal ultrasound and found the baby, and after a bit of re-adjustment found a strong heart beat in the little angel, although she mentioned that baby looked a little small at first, from the second angel at which she saw the strong heartbeat, she mentioned that baby looked at least 6 possible 7 or more weeks. She reccommended that i have a follow up visit at our local hospital just to make sure everything was ok with our little one. She also mentioned that I might bleed for a few days as there was some blood still in me, but there was over a 90% chance that baby would be grand. I did pass some blood on sunday evening, but none since. As you can imagine, Hubby and i were elated that all was well with our baby.
Its now wednesday and I've just come back from another (internal) ultrasound scan at an Early Pregnancy Clinic. This time the doctor i saw said that the heartbeat was very slow and that the baby only seemed around 6-7-ish weeks and that this was quite worrying. He told me to be "cautiously optimistic" as the baby was quite small and that he thought the heartbeat was too slow for the age it was. He was concerned about my dates, and told me that it "could go either way", and booked me in for a follow up scan next week. I bled a little bit again after the scan but no more than before and it appears to have stopped now.
As you can imagine, we're absolutely devastated. Although this baby wasn't planned, we've already fallen in love with him/her. I've never heard of this kind of thing before, of the heartbeat slowing so suddenly. My husband is convinced that the doctor just didn't get the ultrasound in at the right angle or misread it or something like that.
Has anyone else been through this and come out with a healthy baby? I've never heard of finding a healthy heartbeat and then it getting slowed down. Is it worrying that the baby is so small when I'm supposed to be 9 weeks? Can internal ultrasounds or sex damage the baby?
I'm terrified that something might happen to our baby.
Sorry I can't offer any useful advise, but I'm sure there will be plenty of lovely ladies that can. The only thing I can suggest is just take it one day at a time and as hard as it would be, try not to worry too much. I hope everything turns out ok
Hi Christa,
Congrats on the pg, athough it sounds ike a worrying time for you and your DH atm...
No advice from me either im afraid.
Just wanted to give you a and let you know that there is a world of support in here, im sure that someone will be able to offer some reassuace.
Hang in there little one!!
As Tannis said, one day as a time, make sure that you rest over the next few days,
Goodluck with the next U/S, i will be thinking of you
take care
Like the others, I can't really offer any advice but I do want to say to keep strong and hopeful, your bubba needs you.
The only other thing I can think of is that internal scans and intercourse must not hurt the baby, else our health care providers would advise against both of them.
Certainly there's nothing I can think of during intercourse that would hurt the baby... never had an internal u/s so I'm not sure exactly how they work but I can't see how they would hurt either...
Hi Sugarfiend
Spotting is quite common in early pregnancy especially at the time you would normally have had your period if you weren’t pregnant. The amount of bleeding you describe I would consider to be normal and not be worried about it. Sometimes the cause of this bleeding can be traced to recent vigorous exercise or sex.
The clot you passes is quite small and again I would not be overly concerned about this and would suspect that it was formed by you sitting and not moving much for a couple of hours or so.
To check the size of the baby correctly they need to do a number of measurements, they should not estimate the size on what they think it looks like. Even when they do use the measurements the dates they give you can be out by as much as 7 days.
The Doctor who said that the “heartbeat was very slow” did he say what it was? A normal heartbeat should be somewhere between 110 and 160 however it is quite common for this rate to be lower than 110 for a short time.
Sex and/or internal ultrasounds cannot harm your baby.
Sadly yesterday we had another scan and were told that the baby i've miscarried and that our baby had died. The baby measured in at 6w 0d on the 12 of oct, 6 1d on the 15th and 6w 2d yesterday, 22nd of october and were told that the baby's heart had stopped beating completely. I swear, our hearts splintered into a million pieces.'
I just died right there.
We don't know what to do with myself now. DH has gone to work and I'm alone at home.
We're going back next week to the hospital to make the decision as to what to do next. I'm not bleeding anymore, I don't know if i'll even naturally physically miscarry soon. Something called DNC was mention, though i'm sure we'll be told more about next time.
Thank you Alan, Tania, Oceanprincess and Sammiejane for your kind words of reassurance.
I was just wondering does anybody know what happens to the baby if I have it surgically removed? It seems so disrespectful to just throw it away. I mean, it was our child, even if he didn't make it. Sorry if i sound crass, its still sinking in.
What happens if i miscarry at home what happens to the baby, what happens if i have to have this DNC thing at hospital, what will they do with our little angel?
Love to all, Through a pair of throughly broken hearts,
Hi Sugarfiend
I have just been through a D&C 21 days ago.
I lost my baby at 9weeks and it had stopped growing at 7 weeks.
I couldn't bare to miscarry at home, not knowing how long it would take so I opted to have the D&C....
With the D&C, it's generally a suction D&C. D is dilate and C for curette. They dilate your cervix to allow them to suction out the uteral lining and whatever is left. I don't know what they do with the remains. I asked if I could have them but was told with what they use to perform the D&C it would be almost impossible so I just let them do what they had to do...
I performed my own little farewell as I didn't have the remains, we used something else...
Some people plant trees or place a plaque in the garden, sprinkle rose petals on the beach - that sort of thing...
If you miscarry at home then you can do what you like with whatever you pass. It will only be small at this stage - I was told it would look like a large clot.
Hope that helps.
I know how hard it is and if you want to talk, I'm here...
Its been so incredibly tough though lately. Was told that forceps would be used in the D&C. I'm absolutely terrified of repercussion of any complication. Like what if the dilation procedures used cause me to develop an incompetent cervix or possible scarring causes me problems conceiving in the future?
The only reason i want to go ahead with it would be because the hospital will arrange blessing and burial for the foetal remains, and i want at least that for our son.
I'm absolutely terrified I've never had surgery ever before.
Sugarfiend - I have never heard of forceps being used before...
What about sitting down with your doctor and going over the procedure in detail and then you can ask about all the risks that are worrying you?
I have healed perfectly fine from my procedure - I had an infection which antibiotics cleared up in days and we have been cleared to try again when we are ready...
Surgery isn't too bad...
They put you to sleep so you don't feel or remember anything and you wake up in recovery with a lovely nurse at your side to reassure you everything is ok if your a bit spacey.
If you have any pain they will give you something for it and then you go back to the day ward and in a few hours after the procedure you will be at home RESTING!!
Give yourself time to rest and recuperate.
Grieve and mourn.
I'm really sorry for your loss. We also miscarried our first child, he died about a month before we had any signs and I went through with this procedure. It was very important to me to be able to take my baby home and bury him myself. At first I was told that this was not possible but I pushed until I was listened to and, after signing some forms, went back to pick him up at a later time. Whatever you choose to do, this is your baby and you get to say what happens to him.
I was also worried about the surgery and what could come of it. Whilst the whole experience was horrible, it was made much harder by the emotions that I was experiencing. The actual procedure itself was ok and I had no physical issues from it.
Give yourself as much time as you need to make this choice and be really gentle on yourself. It took a long time for me to heal emotionally so make sure you have lots of love and support around you.
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Take care of yourself and we are all here if you need to chat, hun.
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