thread: Saddest time of my life!!

  1. #1
    Registered User

    Jul 2009
    Sydney west
    38

    Saddest time of my life!!

    Nearly 2 weeks ago i found out my babys heart beat had stopped I could not believe my ears. I cried my heart out right than and there and havent stopped.

    I gave birth to my lil baby 2 days later and the pain is so hard. I dont understand why this has happened or were to turn too. I feel like i have failed my bub even though people say its not my fault it really feels like it is.
    I was 19 weeks pregnant. How can this of happened?!

    I feel let down and just dont know what to do!

    Sad and dont know what to do? What do i do now? I feel lost! My heart is broken and feels like it can not be put back together.

  2. #2
    Registered User

    Dec 2007
    Geelong
    3,438

    I'm so sorry for the loss of your precious baby, my heart is breaking for you. I wish I had words to take your pain away. Let yourself grieve in whatever way you feel. I'm so glad you have found BB, I found so much comfort and love here. Take care of yourself and hold your memories of your precious angel close to your heart.

    Regards,
    Dianne
    Emmanuel born sleeping @24wks

  3. #3
    Registered User

    Jul 2008
    Home with my Son :)
    2,611

    Sunshine big hugs to you.. Everything you are feeling is normal. My advice is to grieve the way you need to and be gentle on yourself.. Maybe you can honour your baby with jewelry, or plant a tree or something like that. Just do what feel right. Did you give your baby a name? Maybe seek out a support group like SANDS SIDS and kids or Bonnie Babes.. These things I am suggesting may not be right for everyone so do what you feel you need to. I am so sorry for the loss of you precious baby.

  4. #4

    Feb 2008
    With my awesome cherubs
    2,975

    big hugs to you hun, i feel your pain i really do my little boy was born at 25 weeks and passed away 3 hours later theres no way of describing just how heavy your heart feels after that. Grieve as much and as long as you like and most importantly HOW you like, many people cope differently. I am so sorry for your loss.

    Nikkie
    Anthony James (born 25 weeks) my little angel in heaven

  5. #5
    Registered User

    Jan 2008
    Busselton
    218

    I also know just how you feel.I also lost a little boy at 19weeks, with no reason they could find. Let it all out - cry, hide, whatever. Just do whatever you need to to get through. For me it was avoiding certain people and situations that brought it all back, and trying to keep busy after the initial few weeks of crying in my room passed. I found keeping a journal and making a special memory box very helpful, and after a while, a special little ceremony by the beach to let him go, when i was ready ( a year later), where we read poems and said goodbye. He has his own Christmas decoration (the angel on top of the tree) that stays in his memory box throughout the year)I found SIDS & Kids here in Perth a great help when it was just all too much to bear.

    But as everyone else has said just do what feels right for you- there is no right or wrong way to cope with your loss

    After time has passed, I found the memories became bitter-sweet - he did change my life and gave me a gift of realizing how precious life is and I will always be grateful for that. He may have been stillborn - but he was born still. Your baby will always be with you, too. There is also hope- I have since given birth to 2 healthy boys - losing Tom was a rare once off.

    Big hugs xx

    Thomas Peter born sleeping 19 weeks

  6. #6
    BellyBelly Member

    Jan 2005
    Brisbane
    1,300

    I am so sorry to hear of your loss.....please dont blame yourself for this sweetie you didnt do anything wrong.

    Please take as long as you need to greive for the loss of your precious little one. Thinking of you

  7. #7
    Registered User

    Oct 2008
    Victoria
    4,601

    I'm so very sorry for your loss.

  8. #8
    Registered User

    Jan 2008
    Brisbane
    5,039

    how can you die and be in so much pain all at once! I can hear your screaming! I am so sorry for your loss!

  9. #9
    Platinum Member. 2010 RAK Recipient

    Jun 2009
    455

    Sunshine - I left you a message in our other thread. I'm so so sorry for what you are going through - the pain you must be feeling right now must be so hard to bear but you are a very strong person to have gone through this already you will get through it even though it feels like you won't each day is different and give yourself all the time and care and love you can you did not fail your baby you did everything you could to bring them into the world it is cruel that you had to go through this but you are not alone sadly there are women here who understand and who will help you through let them hold you be kind to yourself cry and find comfort in the people near you who love you who would do anything to help stop the pain not everyone will understand out there but in here they will and will always be there with a comforting word or kindness or wisdom take care love Alice xx