Berenice, you are not weird hun! First of all, I'm sorry you've lost your wee Twinkle. Big hugs hun. When I lost Josh, I would also continue to write down how many weeks i would be on my calendar. I was doing it when Josh was still in my belly, and when he he wasn't there anymore, I kept going. For me it was honouring his memory and I wanted to keep going until his EDD, I guess I wasn't ready to let him 'go' just yet. My psych told me that by continuing with the calendar, I was still in my 'pregnancy' journey, and when his EDD arrived I would suddenly not feel pregnant anymore. It's so weird but I DID still feel pregnant right up until his EDD, and then when that arrived, I let him go. It was a strangely calm feeling, like he flew away then and not 4 and a half months earlier.
I'd say it's natural to want to know how you'd be feeling if you were still pg, at how many weeks etc. But at the same time, you won't be ready to start another journey if you wish so, until you let 'go' of Twinkle, and by that I don't mean by forgeting him, I mean by accepting your loss and dealing with it properly. Hun, we never forget our angels, ever, but by accepting our losses and moving forward, we are in a way healing ourselves for the next journey ahead.

Big hugs sweetie.

Beata xxx