I'm so relieved you benefited from my post darl... to be honest I nearly deleted it... I don't often tell people what they should or shouldn't feel. I thought it might have sounded too harsh. However having been through such a similar experience and having started to walk down that path of not living in hope I guess i got a glimpse of that choice of pathway.... and it really felt to me that it was a path of continuing sadness, not relief and healing.

This is your time for healing now. Surround yourself with things that will enhance your sense of renewal... I pray that you find some answers to why this is happening... and hope that we all can pass on some vibes of strength to help you start the journey again