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Im sure it wont sometimes these horrible things happen i dont know why but they do.. with my m/c i have come away stronger and my relationship is stronger our love really changed and we cant wait to share our love with a beautiful baby very soon....
It might be worth increasing your folate intact and im sure the drs will do extra tests and keep a close eye on you with the next pg..... I hope with all my heart that we both g on to have happy and healthy babies very soon..
Well Im back here again, I dont remember any of you as my first m/c was Dec 05. Ive just has my third m/c this time at 4.5 weeks. It doesnt get any easier does it? It was our first cycle TTC after having our miracle baby in Sept 06. My first loss was a missed m/c at 8.5wks in Dec 05 then I lost our son's twin at 6wks in Feb 06.
Im very sorry to see everyone here, its awful just how common it is :(
Hi everyone.
Anna - sorry that you are back here again. This really is such a hard time to get through, and we are all thinking of you. You are right, it is awful how common this is, and how so many people are not aware of that, or aware of how painful it is to go through, esp more than once. Cuddle your son and enjoy the fact that you have him, and you WILL give him a little brother or sister soon. :hug:
Mattsmum - it's funny how these things let you know what it is that you really want. Before we started TTC, I was worried about work, etc, and thinking maybe we should wait a little longer until my career is more established, and until we had more money. After the first m/c, I was soooo certain about what I want. I want a big family, and that is more important than money and career. But now that I know that is what I want, I can't seem to get it! After the second m/c, I just fell apart, and now I am convinced I will never have the thing I want most. Please try to believe that this won't happen again, the chance of that would be so very small. And I am sure your care providers will take good care of you next time and will understand your anxiety.
Jane- it is funny how these things can make a relationship stronger. DH and I are as strong as ever, and the last 3 months have not been fun for us. We have fought and struggled with our feelings over everything, but we are still so strong, so maybe that is the only good thing we can get out of all this...
I lost my baby January 3,2007 I find myself thinking of him all the time. I cry blaming myself how and why did it happen? Its so hard getting over what happen my husband dont want to talk about it and it makes me so mad that he dont want to talk about it but I do. I have so many feelings balled up inside of me that need to come out. This was my third pregnancy that I was not aware of. The thought of trying again is scary but I am more than anything I want it to happen and everything be alright. God will help us get through this I will never give up.
God Bless everyone that is trying again never give up:angel:
Hi all,
janeo - its so nice to hear that you knew someone that went through a similar experience that then went on to have a beautiful healthy baby. It really boosts the spirit. I too hope that we all go on to have healthy baby's soon. I am still taking my Blackmores pregnancy to keep up the folate. I have also found that this has brought DH and I so much closer than we have been for a while. It's funny how life takes over and you lose sight of each other for a while. Things like this can either make or break a relationship and the one thing I am greatful for from all this is that it has made ours stronger.
AnnaT/nikilove...well everyone - I'm so sorry for you all. I'm not sure how much support I will be having only just gone through this myself but i'll try to help as much as I can.
Niki - I'm sorry you can't talk talk to your husband about what has happened. Give him time to grieve in his own way and hopefully he will open up soon. In the meantime feel free to vent as much as you like here. That's what everyone here is for. It's not good to keep things bottled up so share it around and we'll help. One thing I am certain of is that you have to stop blaming yourself. It wasn't anything you did, or didn't do.
All my best to everyone.:grouphug:
__________________
Matts Mum (32) DH (38)
:babyboy: Matthew - 5/3/05
:angel: 11/1/07 - 13 weeks and 3 days
Hi all,
This is Matt's Dad posing as Matts Mum.
Firstly I'd like to thank you all for your support and good wishes. There is one thing about being the guy and that is no matter how much you can be there for the DW you can't say you know how it feels. I am so glad you are there for her.
Niki
I just wanted to let you know the male side of what happens to hopefully help. Us as the males can't know the pain you go through but we want to take it away. If we had the choice we would take it all rather than see you suffer. We in our own stumbling way try to do that by not talking about it as that just causes more pain - probably not the best response but we think differently.
The other thing we want to do is solve the problem,move on etc which works well for us but not for our DWs who want to share.
The other thing I've noticed is that guys suffer in solitude (my wife tells me it is the gals as well). I have mentioned our loss to a number of guys and there has been a huge number who have gone though the same but I have never heard it from a guy before. Each time they seem to me to be relieved to finally be able to unload without making the pain more. The one thing that is common is that they all feel a huge loss but are more concerened with there DWs. I think it helps us as we are concentrating on you rather than thinking of our own losses.
I think I have raved on enough - sorry for taking up too much space
Matts Dad
Matt's Dad thanks for sharing the male perspective - often people forget the father has feelings to and his own hopes and dreams, let alone having to be the rock when the world comes crashing down when we lose our babies.
:heartbeat: Trish
"~♥~ DD Charlotte Rose 1/9/04 26wks ~♥~"
Samuel & Joel God's Gifts 1st July 06
Matt's Dad - that was great of you to respond. I think most DHs deal with this the same way, and it can be difficult for DWs to understand! My DH I think is exactly the same as you. I am glad that you did get to talk to some friends about it, it just seems that people really do not talk about this enough, esp as it is actually quite common. It is v difficult for men, I found that people were so sympathetic and worried about me when I m/ced, but DH was going through a v rough time too, and was trying to be strong for me. Even the nurses at the hospital, although they were great, they focussed on me and my feelings more than DHs, and I know it was a v hard time for him.
Hi to everyone else, I hope you are all travelling well.
Bun xx
Seems very quiet in here..a VERY good sign.
Thought I'd pull up a chair and sit down. Jed and I lost our twins last wednesday, Bit of a shock to have a m/c to start with let alone twins.
Hope others out there are doing fine and life has revolved around for them.
Firstly Maz, I am so sorry for what you must be going through. I hope this forum helps a bit :grouphug:
I hope everyone is doing better and thank you all for sharing your stories. And I hope you don't mind if I offload mine.
I had a d&c 3 weeks ago, it was my first pregnancy and I was at 9 weeks.
When we found out we were preggers :dance: , DH & I hid from our friends and lied to those we couldn't avoid for the first 8 weeks of our pregnancy. Then we joyously told all our family and friends. At the first ob appointment we were excited that we would see the baby's heart beat, but there was none. DH was great. He did all the talking (passing on the bad news) while I did loads of crying :crying:
Usually I am quite strong. But for the first time in my life I am struggling to cope. Between finding out that I was carrying a blighted ovum, and having the d&c, I was emotionally ok. But since the d&c, I have been very down. I was just searching the web, looking for some evidence that I am still normal, when I came accross this forum.
Thank you everyone for sharing. Your positivity is inspirational. And I hope better times are in store for you all.
PS Has anyone noticed all the lying involved? Like, don't tell anyone you're preggers until 12 weeks, which means lying about why you're not drinking, going to smoky places, tucking into that gorgeous brie, etc. Then after an m/c, your friends don't know what to say, so you have to lie and pretend that everything is fine? If you didn't tell them you were preggers, you still have to lie and pretend everything is the same as before.
PPS Sorry this is so long. And here I go, making it longer still :)
Welcome to BB Pash
I'm so sorry for your loss. The lying is hard isn't it? We only told 4 people about our pg before it was lost so I've not had many people to share it with. I have now started to tell friends about it (and I can do so without crying) and it is helping me feel better about the whole thing. We have decided to jump right back in there and are ttc again now. When you are ready to do the same come and join the ladies in TTC after m/c in the monthly thread. They are a lovely supportive bunch and have got me through many difficult days. Good luck with everything.
Oh pash I am so sorry about you little angle. I know the feeling of looking for a heartbeat and .....nothing. It breaks my heart that you have to go through this pain. No one can take the pain away only time will help you heal.
God bless and take care.
Hi Pash
I havent been here for such a long time but your story really touched me, i thought i was fine with the 2 m/c i had (last one was twins) but reading your post just reminded me how i felt for a very long time. The good news - you will feel better, i never thought i would but sometimes it just takes that 1 thing or word or whatever for you to move on. Dont give up hope, and good luck.
I don't usually depend on the kindness of strangers, but I was blown away by the kindness of your responses. Thanks Satya, Cherie & Owl. Isn't it weird how much you can open up to strangers, sometimes more than those close to you? Maybe you don't want to worry them, or let them see the chinks in your armour, or in all the excitement over the cricket, it never comes up :)
Owl, I am sorry to hear about your losses. It must be difficult. Are you ttc now? (I've almost got the lingo down :) )
Satya, thanks for the other response too. I'm going to go reply to that after this :)
Cherie, thanks for the kind words. Are you ttc now too? I can't wait till my first AF. I'm rearing to get back into it. (Its not often you can admit that in public now, is it?)
Pash
It is amazing really how we do look for support in people we dont know and find such comfort there. I think it has alot to do with the fact there is no judging just genuin care. I know it has helped me come a long way! I am definatley ttc now I just finised my first AF since my D&C. I am excited but scared (Suppose that is normal under the circumstances). I hope your TTC journey is a short one for you and me both:pray:
Well, here I am. :( Back again. It's been one week since I first started spotting and had that awful feeling that everything was over. Again. The blood test done at the hospital last Sunday showed my hCG levels had dropped to 6000 and the miscarriage was confirmed on Monday with an ultrasound scan that showed no heartbeat and a baby which had stopped developing at about 7w1d. I'd had a scan on March 26 that had shown my baby at 6w3d with a flickering heartbeat. While I'd had diminishing pregnancy symptoms in the two weeks prior, I'd consoled myself that it was because I was nearing the end of the first trimester and that I hadn't had any bleeding or cramping. I was so keen to see my baby again at the 12 week scan, desperately keen to see the heartbeat again and movement! I'd even been looking at hiring/buying a doppler, so anxious was I, but stopped myself from clicking on "confirm" because I was so close to having that scan. Today I'm still spotting since Tuesday's d&c and I'm feeling so alone. I am just so grateful for BB. It's the only place I can "talk" about how I'm feeling and look for a reason to keep hope in my heart.
Again im so so so so sorry Kerry.. Im here if you need to talk anytime my m/c was very similar to yours in that my baby had become an angel earlier then when i found out...
I would like to discuss my experience with my miscarriage. On March 31,2007 I got married after 8 years of being together. We never tried to get pregnant before but decided to try right away after we got married. We got pregnant right away on our honeymoon. We flew to Vegas, drove to San Diego and then went on a Mexican Rivera Cruise for 7 days. When we got home I had some dizziness but thought that was sea legs and getting adjusted to be off the ship. When I missed my period we decided to take a HPT. It came back positive, so I figured that I got pregnant on our first try. I called to make a doctors appointment and in between the time I found out and went to the doctors I took 5 HPT. During this time I was paranoid everytime I felt a ting or a pain. Right before I went to the doctors I had really bad period like pains. I went to the doctor and found out that I was 6 weeks and 4 days they did a internal ultrasound and there was the baby and the doctor said that she heard a heartbeat and that my changes of a m/c were only 5%. Exactly a week later I m/c. First it started as a light brown spot on Thursday but thought that maybe it was nothing and it was very faint. On Friday it was more so i called the doctor and told her and she told me that there was nothing to worry about. I felt so much better after that but then I went to the bathroom and there was blood. I was scared and didn't know what to do but the doctor said that there might be some blood that was left over from previous period. I laid down eventually fell asleep woke up at 2 and went to bathroom and there was nothing there I felt relieved and went back to sleep woke up at 7 and was scared to go to bathroom and when I did I passed 2 big clots. I cried and begged with my baby to hold on that mommy was there and that I would take care of it. I called the doctor had to go into the emergency room and have a D&C. It's now been a 1 1/2 months we are going to try after my second cycle but I am terrified that it will happen again. I have this feeling of constant sorrow everyday that just wont go away and I keep thinking that it was my fault. I wonder if it the drinking that I did while on our honeymoon and after before I took a HPT. I wonder if it is because I was around my dad who is a chain smoker or because I was so scared and stressed out. I wish that my husband and I didn't wait so long to start our lives together. I wonder if it from the eating disorder that I have had off and on for the past 10 years. I wish that I would have taken better care of my body. Sorry that this is long but I didn't know where to post this. i just needed to write all this down maybe someone can help me.
also an add on to my previous post. Ever since I got married we have had bad luck. First I m/c then the week later my parents dog suddenly had to be taken to vet and put down for a tumor that went unnoticed, a week after that our wash machine broke then a week after that I have to take my husband into the emergency room and found out that he needed emergency surgery to remove his appendix, he was in the hospital for 2 days and off of work for 2 1/2 weeks. We are just wondering when our luck will turn around for us and scared for what the next week will bring.
BIG HUGS Faith....... It is so hard having a m/c....... Your life gets turned upside down for this little bundle of joy..... But hold in there matey, it will never go away but it becomes easier, i lost my angel baby 6 mths ago and i still think about my angel every day, we had decided to start trying straight away and i thought i would be stressed to the max when i fell, but after 3 mths i hadnt fallen pg and i was so stressed i thought i was going to have a break down.. We got engaged and decided to keep trying and hold off wedding but i was having a horrible time TTC so we decided to get married first and put TTC on hold...
Since then im in a much better mind frame im happier, and my cycles have gone to being near normal.... Its hard at the moment as my due date is in 2 days and that is really hard but i know that i will be a mother soon and so will you....
Maybe take sometime out for yourself Faith, trying and push the negative thoughts out and bring in the good thoughts, even with the horrible things you are going through at the moment, you are healthy so is DH, you are newly weds and enjoy that and then bubs will come along im sure of that....... It helped me to talk to someone about it too maybe thats worth looking into....
Hi Faith, my name is Kat. I have been roaming around bb for a few weeks now. Not yet preg, again, but i am in preparation.
I have suffered two late losses and one miscarriage. I think with the miscarriage i tried to ignore that it happened. Because my first loss was at 18 weeks i started to feel like a little miscarriage wasn't the same thing and i didn't need to grieve as much. After a few months and a near marriage breakdown i realised that every loss has its sadness and needs to be greived, no matter how small.
I too felt guilty about everything. I actually didn't have tests done because i was blaming the fact that i had smoked, that my hubby smoked and drank. I put all the blame on myself. Since loosing my daughter Zahra i have found out i have a blood disorder which has possibly been the cause of my problems. I was too busy blaming myself to look at any other possibilities. It is so easy to blame ourselves.
I also thought i would tell you of my year of bad luck after my hubby and i got married. We returnrd from our honeymoon to find out the house we were renting was being sold and we had two weeks to find somewhere to live. (we were given four weeks notice, but two of those weeks we were blissfully un aware.)
My hubby lost his license and then his job
My recurring sore back from a fall 3 years prior starting playing up, i too had to stop working
Our car broke down while we were moving, never got fixed
We stayed with friends for a few weeks and eventually moved to a small town and started fresh. We then decided to start to try for a baby. A year later i got pregnant and that started our long road of disapointments and losses. Everything else has panned out ok, i got a great job at the local pub and hubby is about to start his own business. I think these things are here to test us and its how we deal with them that matter. What is that saying, what ever doesn't kill you makes you stronger?
I hope that even just writing your post has helped you a little bit. I send a big hug:hug: and wish you all the best for your future. Try not to be too hard on yourself and take each day as it comes. Dont be afraid to cry. It brings on a strange sort of releif. All the best from Kat
Hi Faith, I am so sorry that you have to go through this. It's probably going to be a really hard time for you & DH, but you will come through it. Don't beat yourself up over what might have been. My GP told me that 95% of m/cs are due to chromosomal problems, and nothing to do with what the mother ate/drank/did. He also said that if something is wrong with the baby, it will miscarry, no matter how careful you are. So please don't blame yourself or your marriage.
I found it really helpful to rant & rave here. So, welcome, and you can put down any of your feelings here. No matter how sad they are, someone here will have been through something similar, and can probably help you come through it.
I hope you find a way to grieve & come through this sad time. :hugs:
Thank you everyone for your encouraging thoughts and words. Even though this is a trying time for my DH and I we have hope that next time there will be a better outcome. 2 years ago when my sister was 5 months pregnant she had a stillbirth due to an incompetent cervix. She was in the hospital for a week trying to save the pregnancy and we would all go up there to see her and were there when she had her son. We were able to all hold him and take photos with him. I now have my first u/s photo and his photo together in a safe place together. The doctors found her condition troubling because she had already had 2 healthy kids but she had them 16 years earlier. She got pregnant again about 4 months later and had a stitch put in and was on progestrone shots and bedrest for 4 months and had a healthy boy. I also have had 3 friends with problems. One of my friends have been trying for 7 months and is on Clomid another had her baby girl when she was in her 6th month and another had an ecpotic pregnancy. A neighbor of my sisters was due within a week wasn't feeling well went to the doctor and found out that they had lost there baby boy. He was 9lbs.
I know that next time that I get pregnant again I will definetly not take it for granted. I know that alot of women will go on to have a successful pregnancy after a m/c and I hope that we all can experience the joy and happiness that they feel.
I also feel that I had certain signs right before my m/c. The Thursday night after my DH softball game I was watching Greys Antomy and the women on there had a m/c. I was reading a book and in it a women had a m/c. After my m/c which was in my 7th week but 3 days away from being 8 weeks the number 8 popped up on the tv during a commerical. It was really weird.
Thanks again to everyone and sorry for this being soo long and for some of the misspelled words.
Yeah Faith the same thing happen to us after our m/c, every tv show we watched either talked about m/c had one in it, and 2 movies we watched the same thing and the book i got for christmas had a m/c exactly the same as mine.. Very hard... But you are sounding a lot my +ve and my thoughts are still with you...
OH girls - im sitting here crying cause I to know how much m/c hurts. My wounds are still fresh from my twins that I lost in March. This pg is my 11th, I have 3 darlings and the rest just weren't ready to come to my welcoming arms. There is hope, after every storm there is a rainbow.
Keep up with your positive thoughts (as hard as it is ATM) and know that there are girls on here who feel your pain. I just wish I could hug you all and let you know it will be alright.
xxmaz
Hi girls,
I have been reading your stories and my heart goes out to you all. So many of us feel this pain that others can't even imagine. I am actually miscarrying today, so i am needing to 'offload' my feelings as i feel so confused.
I first had a miscarriage at 12 weeks a few years ago (we had no indication of anything gone wrong - went for the 12 week u/s to find baby with no heartbeat, so had to have D & C which i found so clinical and so impersonal in hospital as they made me be in the maternity ward!!!??). The good news is i recovered and went on to have a healthy little boy (major complications during pregnancy and after his birth, but that's for another time).
Found out last week i was pregnant, 3 positive HPTS, and a positive blood test also. Then, spotting a few days ago, then bright red blood this morning... trip to doc's again, blood count shows hCG not increasing, therefore miscarriage on its way.
Now i am feeling so confused... bleeding just dribs and drabs tonight, but i know it needs to come out... i had been using natural progesterone cream (which i used with my son's pregnancy) to help maintain the pregnancy, but now that this pregnancy is not viable anymore, i wonder how long it will take for my body to have the complete miscarriage and expel it all.
Sorry for long message... just so sad tonight... don't want to have D & C as it caused me to have Grade 4 Placenta Praevia with my son's pregnancy (and all the probs i had). Does anyone have any advice on how i can help my body to miscarry naturally and quickly? (It also took me sooo long for my normal cycle to get back after the previous m/c - i am worried it will take forever to get regular again, let alone conceive again!). Sorry for rambling...just needed to get this out.
Shari.
Just an update on my situation... have decided not to have D & C and my body has almost resolved itself now (yay). Going in for an ultrasound on Wednesday to make sure that there are no more "retained products of conception" (i hate doctor terminology). Fingers crossed that it will all be okay.
Where has everyone gone to?
This thread never seems to get going really, which is a shame.
kbowman - OMG I'm so sorry! I didn't even know you were UTD!
Ladies - if there is anyone that needs to talk, I'll be happy to :)
I didn't know that this thread was here. Have just been lurking because I don't feel like talking about TTC atm. I am having a very bad day and have been bawling for most of it. I had my pg confirmed last week by HPT and then had a BT on Saturday only to start bleeding on Sunday night. The doctor called me Monday afternoon passing on his congratulations and that the BT confirmed my pg - I had just m/c not long before he called. I keep hearing of women bleeding and thinking that they have mc'd and they are still UTD. I am wishing that were me right now but I know it isn't because of the huge clot I passed and my temps went right down. I know I am being a little hard on myself, but I am sick of my body right now. sorry for the whinge, but I just have nobody that understands the feelings that I have.
Nicambahar
I am so sorry! I wish this didnt happen to you. I know how awful it is and the feeling that your body just cant get it right. Take time to heal and take one day at a time and soon enough you will have a baby in your arms.
Take care
NIcambahar - matie I wish I could give you a big hug. I am so sorry for your little one not sticking honey. Try and focuss (Yes, I know how hard it is) on the positive (god knows what that is atm) and heal yourself inside. It has taken my ages to get to know this baby inside of me after loosing my twins in March. My sil just had a D&C yesterday after a 12week pg and my feelings are still very raw.
The girls in here are fabulous. they are our shoulders when no one else will give us one. I dont know how I owuld have survived without many of them.
I'll be praying that you heal soon and that you have that loving baby you so deserve, in your arms soon.
hey girls
guess i belong here as well
we lost our bubba at 12 weeks as well. This bubba took 4 years of trying with IVF, natrupathic, reflexology, and anything else that could help. Finally we got a sticker with a FET. Everything was going really well and was feeling bubba moving around and feeling crook as.
Went for my 12 week scan and found out that the heart had stopped a couple of days before. No signs, no symptoms - nothing
so had to have a suction currette
so here i am - stil really sad- but getting there. I am finding it hard to cope with as i can't just get pg again easily. If i knew it could happen again- it would make it a bit easier -but it is such a struggle to even get that far
I know that there are a couple of us that were due around the same time in april 2008, so would love to chat with those that are going through the same type of thing, as well as those that have been there before.
thanks
odette
Odette - I am unfortunately in exactly the same postion as you at the moment :(
I found out on Tuesday at my 12 wk appt that our bub had passed away. I had no signs (except for a gut feeling that something was wrong, I so wish I had acted earlier on it :() and still had pg symptoms right up until the curette was done. I'm sure also that having no ms was a sign for me that things weren't right - I had terrible ms with my DD.
I am still very much struggling to cope with everything that has happened this week - I just wish the next few weeks would suddenly disappear so I can start to feel a bit better.
We conceived this bub on my first cycle of Clomid, so while we have had a few troubles conceiving, we have had nothing like you have been through. I'm hopeful we should conceive again fairly easily on Clomid. So I guess I can't help much with that side of things, you do have my sympathies :( Maybe just hold on to the knowledge that you have conceived once now - there must be a good chance that the FET will work again for you.
Anyway, I hope I haven't said the wrong thing at all, and if you want to chat I'll be around.
Nicambahar - sorry to hear you are not doing well today :( I know exactly how you feel. I just cry at the drop at the drop of a hat lately. I guess the only advice I can give you is to take it as it comes - that's what I'm trying to do, not very successfully I must admit :( I just feel like my life has changed forever.
Cherie - Thankyou very much.. It's so nice to know that complete strangers care so much.. I am so stoked that you are pg again, take care and I hope that you have a healthy pg. xx
Maz - I am really struggling through without any family support. My DP works very long hours 6 days a week and I am just so damned alone.. I am now worried about getting pg again because I feel so pesimistic about it all.. You have hit the nail on the head when you say that it has taken time to get to know your knew little bun inside becuase I feel as though each loss is a loss of a person and everyone around me just says "oh well, it wasn't meant to be", I am so sick of hearing that right now.
Odette - My first loss was the same, I was 15wks and felt that something wasn't right. Our baby had passed a week or so earlier. I have found that with each loss I have gone balistic emotionally a day or two before it happens and am wondering if my losses and trouble conceiving are something to do with my hormones. I am heading back to my Dr on Monday and am demanding that he lose his blaze' attitude and do some tests.
Megsmum - sorry to hear of your loss, sounds as though we have had the same week too. I am bawling all the time, even over there being no tea bags in the cupboard. Can I ask how Clomid works, I have heard of it alot but don't really know anything about it.
sorry if I don't really make any sense atm, my mind is just mash and I can't think straight. I am so very glad to have you guys right now because I feel so lost sitting here by myself. Take care xx
Nicambhar - each loss is your special person matie..you grieve honey. Jed and i made a garden for our babies we have lost. It helps at times when I feel down or even on a 'normal' day when I look out of my window and my eye catches hold of the plants, I think of my babies. Jed and i even named our twins cause they ment os much to us. Sunni and Willow.
I hear you on falling pg again....it really was very difficult for me to accept this little person growing in me. I felt guilty almost yet scared $hitless at the same time. Just take time for you and DH right now matie, and again, allow yourself to cry as much as you want to.
Odette and susannah - girls, I am so so sorry for you both. I know it doesnt really mean much when your heart has been torn in 2 but please know that if you need to talk and just get out all the angry and hurt, there are other people standing next to you to support you here. Take some time out for yourselfes and remember the little person you had developing inside of you, even if it was for a sort time. Cherish them in your hearts. I wish I could just give you all the biggest hug. I had no-one other than my darling Jed and the wonderful girls here at BB to help my thorugh my m/c. Fmaily and firends (RL) were usless with their false concerns as many of them had never had a m/s before so they couldnt relate to the pain inside.
Try and relax girls...with everystep back...you do actually start to inch forward.
Hi Odette, Megsmum and Nicambhar - it is not fair hey!
I too have the same feelings that you all described. I m/c twins and had my curette on 31st August and yes I was an April belly buddy with you Odette. I guess we were all due in April were we not???? This is my 2nd m/c of twins and I think having lost 4 babies now is doing my head in! Each day is getting easier and each day I just hug my little boy so tight and realise how lucky I am. I think I have read far too many stillborn stories lately that makes me realise that I would hate to go through that. Everyone says well there was obviously something wrong, and I know that but it doesn't make the pain any less. I have met some amazing ladies on this site and they have helped me imensley get through this sadness of mine. I have atleast 5 people now around me that I know very well in real life that are pregnant and due around the same time as I was and I think this is what is making my sorrow so fresh still. My sister is due 2 weeks after me and I hate having these feelings of resentment towards other people when they tell me they are pregnant, and I am not! I just don't understand why my body gives me twins if I can't carry them!
Take care girls and would love to continue chatting with you.
Girls, i feel for you all and know what you are all going through. It totally totally totally sucks and is not fair. Sending out the biggest hugs to you all and praying that we all get our longed-for babies in our arms very soon.
I am sooooo angry right now. I have just come back from the Dr's. He asked me to come back in and see him after he found out that I had mc again. He asked me why I didn't go to the hospital, I wasn't in friggin pain, I was bleeding and I knew that I was having a mc but what can be done about it?
Then he asked me if it were necessary to TTC again...... scuse me, I didn't think that I had to justify myself to anybody about how many children I want. arrrrrrrgggghhhh, people wonder why I don't go to the doctors very often..
Phew, with that off my chest now, my bloods came back normal - my thyroid levels were checked. The only thing was that I was extremely low in Vit D. I did ask him about the Vitex and he seemed to think that it was a gimmick..
As for the TTC front, I think I might be O super duper early. Am on CD8 and have had loads of EWCM and my temp has taken a huge dive this morning. I am so confused about everything now.
Sheree - I am so happy for all my pg buddies too, but I do feel a bit of pain as well and maybe some envy. I had waited such a long time to put my name up in lights with a BFP and it was so short lived.
Maz - You are so lovely to take the time out to share your story. I keep reading over your post as it provided me with some comfort. Thankyou..