Oh Miss B That was kinda how I looked at my d&c as well, I'd been bleeding for so long that I wanted to be able to just move on.

How is everyone else? I saw your thread Diamond Girl, and was kinda at a loss as to what to say. Second guessing my reply and all that. I don't think we ever really get to the stage where we can hold newborns and see other babies and pregnant women without feeling that stab; I guess the best we can hope for is that the cut might not be so deep one day y'know?

AFM, Meow sent me a PM about something called 5-MTHFR the other day. Basically, some people are genetically unable to metabolise synthetic folate and folic acid. So all the vitamins, all the folic acid that's added to our food does nothing for us. Not having enough folate or folic acid can cause birth defects, recurrent miscarriages and depression. There's testing you can get done, but money's tight for us, so I'm just gonna start having green smoothies. The natural folate/folic acid is metabolised, just not the synthetic stuff. Given that all of my bubs were 6 weeks and I suffer from depression, I reckon I have it anyway. And there's no harm in getting more folate and folic acid anyway, right?

So I'm kinda putting my hopes on that. Doing the stupid exercise that hurts me and counting every dumb calorie as well of course. Hoping desperately that SOMETHING will work, because at the moment I am so skin hungry for my own take home baby that I could cry.