Hi everyone, well I'm losing the baby, I started to bleed last night and it just got heavier and heavier, and now I have really bad cramps, so I'm pretty sure I'm losing the baby!
Rang Dr. and he said there's nothing I can do or him for that matter, I see him on Tuesday for an ultrasound just to make sure.
DH and I were up half the night me crying and talking to him and vise versa, we've decided and this was very hard for me to do coz I do want more babies but I strongly feel that this is again nature's way of telling me I have 2 beautiful healthy children and that's my quota if that makes any sense!
I'm now well on Tuesday going to talk to the DR about having a hysterectomy, this is something they've suggested happen after my (well this pregnancy ) was over so it's not a light decision it's one that's been happening for quite a long time.
So Christmas or just after is probably when it'll happen.
I kinda just feel angry but numb, Im angry at my body, coz I can't understand why I can't do this again, so I feel that my body just can't or won't do it again and I honestly can't go through this again, I don't have the strength, and I feel in sayng that, that I'm selfish after all you brave amazing women keep going and going and I'm just giving up, but I just can't anymore.
I feel that now that I've made my decision I need the stength and determination (for lake of a better word) to follow through and put it outta my mind to become a Mummy again, as I said b4 I have 2 amazing wonderful children that I am going to focus on now and love and watch them grow, this desire I have for another will I guess just fade away (hopefully).
I'm not sure what else to write or say nothing can be done or this can't be fixed, I have to except it and move on.
Oh nadia, it breaks my heart to read this. Hun do not feel like you are selfish for not trying any more, you are simply doing what's best for you and your body and your family, I'm sure no one here will think you are selfish.
Know that we are all here for you You are in my thoughts, take care.
Nadia(((hugs))), I am so sorry for what is happening to you. Like Bec said, you are not selfish sweetie. Take care of your self and remember we are all thinking of you.
Nadia, I am so sorry to hear of your loss! Please remember there are scores of wonderful ladies (and a few men!) here at BellyBelly ready to support you.
OMG, Nadia, I am so sorry matey. When I saw your name next to the post and read it my heart sank and all I could do is cry for you. Its just not fair!
My heart goes out to you and DH and please know I am here for you if you ever want to chat. :hugs:
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