Oh I am certainly no help but am sending you hugs and support as my DD is around the same age and does pretty much the same thing - although I am not brave enough to let her run around with no pants/nappies on. Am doing the pull ups as they are supposed to make the child feel wet but save parents the mess of leakages....the first day DD told me that she had had a 'leak' to which I discovered it was just her experiencing the wet feeling with no mess for me to clean up...but after a couple of days wearing them (pull ups) it seems as though she has gotten used to the wet sensation as she won't tell us now. She too will occasionally say about sitting on the loo just for nothing to ever come out..........

Am bf DD#2 so it's very tricky to catch DD#1 in time to get to the loo sometimes and she seems to leave her poo moments right when I am in the middle of a feed....then she tells me!

I hope it all pans out for you soon to give you some mental relief!!