I agree with Onyx - Put her back in nappies, don't think about for how long for at the moment, - with DD (who took over eight months to toilet train when everyone around her was toilet training in what appeared to be one day!). We had zero nappies except for at night for over 14 weeks, I was consistent and tried EVERYTHING, but it didn't work, and unlike you I didn't have her holding on which I can imagine is compounding the problem and stress for you both. I just told her we were going back into nappies until she felt like she wanted to wear knickers, then, a few weeks later (about 4-5 weeks) we started talking about not wearing nappies again and while it wasn't easy, it has slowly happened. I gave her the power to decide instead of fighting something she didn't want to do. Ignore the age of your DD or comparison to other kids, they all do things in their own time (believe me I know how hard it is to do this). You have done a GREAT job trying all these options and your beautiful, articulate little girl will get there, she just needs to do it in her own time. GL
Onyx - You're right, I'm feeling very frustrated by it all. I went from having a baby who despised being in a wet nappy, who'd carry on a treat until it was removed, day or night, to the same child who would now walk around in her own muck all day if I let her. Pull ups aren't really an option so much now. She hangs on for so long that if she goes in a pull-up, there's a lot of overflow She's in sposies. We have the step beside the loo - she doesn't want a bar of it, but she will sit on the potty so I don't want to push her on the actual toilet. On Sunday we were at mum's place and had a friend and her daughter over, DD went into a different room and cried and cried. None of us were in the room with her. I had asked her a few times if she wanted to go to the toilet and she just got more and more distressed. Left her alone for a while and she stopped crying somewhat abruptly - and I got a nappy full of wee.
Sunshine - She's in nappies at the moment. We do go in waves of it. When I feel like it's going downhill in undies, nappies go back on and I don't mention the toilet. I'll answer her questions or statements if she brings it up, but that's it. She's doing the crying thing regardless of if she's in nappies or undies.
My girls had a few unsuccesful attempts before they are ready, sometimes stopping for a bit and letting everything settle before trying again helps
It sounds like she needs privacy, my dd1 needed this which is really tricky when they are still learning. Have you tried letting her go on the potty toilet on her own?
Good luck I thinks ow how frustrating and challenging it can be
I agree with the others she doesnt sound ready and she also sounds nomal behaviour for that age it will pass. I also had some success with physically putting my DS onb the potty every half an hour which was a tiring three days but it paid off and once he finally let go and went it all clicked I would practise pushing noises and run taps to help him go even read storys to him
definatly worth a try with your DD
I think she probably knows what to do, but for some reason just doesn't want to right now. The start of your post sounds very much like my DD, and i know if i try to push her to do anything she does the opposite. For this reason, I am trying to let her lead with TT and even not getting too excited when she shows initiative. i am sure i will be asking you for advice in a few months!
PRMG, my dd was exactly the same! She was 4 before she would use the toilet and I tried EVERYTHING from bribery to taking her to a continence clinic and NOTHING worked.
My advice is to leave it. Don't talk about anything wee, poo or toilet related at all. She will do it when she's ready.
If you need to talk about or any kind help, pm me xx
Sararose - When she sits on the potty, we disappear. There's a wall that juts out in the bathroom and I can see her feet but she can't see me.
Mummabee - When we first started, we were putting her on the potty every 15 to 30 minutes. But I haven't tried it in a long time and I'm a bit spooked that it will put her off completely. I ran taps when we did the 3 day method, especially on the day she held on for hours. Had no impact. I tried putting warm water down the front of her when she sat on the potty but that didn't work either (I read that they feel the warm water trickling down, think that they've gone and then relax and actually do wee at that point)
HotI - That's where I sit. She knows what to do. She just won't do it. And I can't figure out if it's a power thing or not. She's normally very eager to please, so it doesn't make sense.
Tinks - Oh man. 4?? She has to go to kinder next year and she'll turn 4 in March! EEP! What was it that finally clicked with your DD? I'm wondering if when this baby arrives, she'll see the nappies on a newborn and decide that it's for babies.....hoping....hoping....
Yes, 4! I was so worried, I'd toilet trained 2 kids before her with no problems and I had no idea what I was doing wrong or why she wouldn't TT. She was about to start kinder and I was pretty stressed about her still wearing nappies. I had a meeting with the teachers about her wearing nappies, they were really really good about it.
She finally toilet trained because we were going swimming and she wanted to put her bathers on earlier that day. I told her that if she was going to wear her bathers alll day she'd have to use the toilet and she just did! She even came running to me while we were at the pool to go to the toilet. She had her 1st poo on the toilet at the swimming pool! She didn't have one single accident since that day.
It will click with your DD suddenly, just don't push it. She won't still be in nappies at her 21st birthday party
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She's in sposies. We have the step beside the loo - she doesn't want a bar of it, but she will sit on the potty so I don't want to push her on the actual toilet. On Sunday we were at mum's place and had a friend and her daughter over, DD went into a different room and cried and cried. None of us were in the room with her. I had asked her a few times if she wanted to go to the toilet and she just got more and more distressed. Left her alone for a while and she stopped crying somewhat abruptly - and I got a nappy full of wee.
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