Hi Sarah,
I had my two 14 months apart the same week I stopped taking mini-pill, (I was BF too - DS1 was 5 months) but I did not have the pressure of DP not wanting any more kids. He wants as many as I'll have so it's basically up to me. I did feel a little isolated when they were growing up because I didn't drive and my bff and I had stopped talking but I coped until I found support with playgroups. I didn't have trouble with my body returning back to pre-pregnancy weight. I do still have a little bit of lose skin from stretch -marks but I worked hard and ate healthy which also helped my emotional health.
I think you should discuss it with DH and find some support in your area so that you don't feel so isolated. There is nothing worse than feeling overwhelmed, under appreciated and isolated when trying to raise kids so try and look after your mental health first and then the rest will fall into place. I don't know if it affects BF but you could look into alternate methods of contraception such as the Marina device. You definitely need to share with someone near you that you are not coping as well as you should so that they can help you (whether it's hubby or a mother's group, family etc).
I hope this place can be a source of support for you as well.
Good luck!
My two are 12 months apart too. I was breastfeeding but not on the mini pill, and we had only DTD three times. To answer the questions you asked of Kimbaz, I found the pregnancy incredibly difficult as you know from our belly buddy group. My body just wasn't sufficiently recovered and re-energised after a crappy pregnancy with DD#1. Now that I have the two I am finding it very difficult most of the time but every now and then I seem to have an easier day - probably comes along just when I reach the point of looking for a cliff to drive off. My mum is helping me out a huge amount and TBH if she wasn't I'm not sure that I wouldn't have full blown PND.
I only put on 3.5kgs with DD#2 so getting back to pre-pregnancy weight wasn't a problem for me, but there's definitely nothing toned about my body!
I wasn't in the same position as you with a DH who didn't want anymore but more than I didn't want our second baby yet so I was very negative about the pregnancy for most of the time. I think for your own sake you need to test and speak to your DH asap. Nothing worse than worrying about things - we tend to always think the worst!
Quick update, took test (10am) and SNAP i'm NOT pregnant... THANK GOD...
Will tell Dh to go and talk to DR about getting snip. However if he hasn't done it until when Wyatt is 8-10months old tuff luck and I no doubt we'll be fine to fall pregnant than.
Am so realived, the thoughts have been racing through my head of having to buy a new car, only update ours 2 years ago. Along with DH stressing about buying or looking for bigger house, as this is only 3bedroom house. First house is never a forever house, it was something we could affort to buy at the time.
Am copping fine now, it was only when Wyatt was first born, and DS#1 wanted to play with him like a toy. Every morning I write myself a list of things I would like to get done before 10am. If I don't get them done then they go on tomorrow list.
Thanks all for you words of advice. I really dont know how you all cope with them all so close together but it all gets easier.
WEll that is my little huffalump waking up just thought I would update all.
Lulu: That was my main concern. I would like to enjoy Wyatt before even thinking about another one. Thoughts were running though my head, of Wyatt was going to get pushed aside to make way for new baby, when he still baby himself. I would like to have him in day nickers before I give birth to another baby. I think that would be bad, doing a newborn and toddler at the same time.
Anyway how is every thine going with your little girl? Wasn't she the one in our belly group who broke her leg?
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