Michelle - Enjoy the game tonight. I am sure it will be very emotional for you and the family. Thinking of you xxxooo
Bek - You poor thing It sounds like you are having a really rough time with Eva's sleep. I don't know how popular this opinion will be but I am trying to give you my honest feedback in the hope it will help. I am no expert by far, so take from this what you will. From what you have posted it seems to me that she has become very dependent on the breast for sleeping, a sleep association. I will make it very clear that I have no issue with babies feeding to sleep. If it works then that's awesome. Unfortunately it never has for any of my children, particularly during the day. At night, they have woken and fed so I guess this is technically feeding to sleep. But again, I can't say this has 'worked' long term because I have always found myself at the point where they are waking from habit/for wanting the comfort of a feed/not knowing how else to put themselves back to sleep and not from hunger (this becomes clear from the way they feed and in L's case, he got to the point where he would refuse to feed at all most of the time). I am now at that point with D and will need to come up with a plan for both of us to get a better night's sleep.
Can I ask why you are feeding her 3 times in the morning before her attempted first nap? If she is having a feed at 6am and breakfast that should be enough. I would cut out the 8.30am feed and the feed before she goes to bed. It sounds like she is 'snacking' a lot at the breast and again, I think this is very normal for a young baby, but at 9 months I would expect this less. What are these feeds like? Are they big, gulping, full feeds? D generally has a feed on waking, one after his morning nap before lunch, another after his afternoon nap and one at bedtime. He then usually has 1-2 feeds overnight (although sometimes up to 3 if we're having a 'bad' night). This isn't a routine or schedule I have put him on. All of my babies have had a very similar feeding pattern at this age after the introduction of solids.
With her bed time/afternoon nap feeds I would try and break it up a bit by offering her a feed, then something in between (story, cuddles, song) etc before trying to put her down. This will hopefully lessen her association between the boob and sleeping. I have heard that the NCSS book has great tips for this particular issue, but I have never read it myself.
I do not say any of this lightly, I KNOW how hard these issues are to address and have definitely fed a baby to get them to sleep because nothing else was working. But in Eva's case, I don't think feeding her is working either?
Also - you are not starving her. If she has had good weight gains, is generally content, and is eating solids, you are not starving her. How did she sleep after the bottle? Did it help or not?
Wrapping - I understand the heat because I've had babies in the middle of summer and both my boys run hot anyway, very hot sweaty babies. But f you are saying she is still startling in her sleep, I would definitely try wrapping. You can strip her down to her nappy and put a fan in her room if need be and use a very light muslin wrap. It will need to be big, at least 1m x 1m. Why do you say she hates it? Is it because she protests when you try to wrap her? It sounds like she protests at any time you try to put her to sleep, so it might be worth trying to work through that and see if the wrapping actually helps or not. I know most people would tell you she is too old to be wrapped but I disagree. For some babies, it really does make a huge difference to their sleep. Particularly babies who like to be held and rocked to sleep. It just makes them feel a bit more secure. I have been wrapping D with one arm out for quite a while now, since he started rolling and becoming more mobile in the cot. Last night tried wrapping him again firmly with both arms in. He woke once overnight It could be pure coincidence, but maybe not Maybe he is just a baby that needs to be snuggled in tight to have a good nights sleep. I will try again tonight and see what happens. He is a puzzling case my D...he has self settled pretty much from birth and generally sleeps very easily during the day. He was great at night too until the last 2 months when things have started to deteriorate. So I'm not sure what the answer might be with him. I am happy to feed him if that's what he needs but I am not so convinced that is the answer at this point. Very different to L who had difficultly sleeping from birth and just could not self settle consistently for a long time.
Last edited by Willow; April 10th, 2010 at 07:10 PM.
: more typos than I can count!
It sounds like you are having a really rough time with Eva's sleep. I don't know how popular this opinion will be but I am trying to give you my honest feedback in the hope it will help. I am no expert by far, so take from this what you will. From what you have posted it seems to me that she has become very dependent on the breast for sleeping, a sleep association. I will make it very clear that I have no issue with babies feeding to sleep. If it works then that's awesome. Unfortunately it never has for any of my children, particularly during the day. At night, they have woken and fed so I guess this is technically feeding to sleep. But again, I can't say this has 'worked' long term because I have always found myself at the point where they are waking from habit/for wanting the comfort of a feed/not knowing how else to put themselves back to sleep and not from hunger (this becomes clear from the way they feed and in L's case, he got to the point where he would refuse to feed at all most of the time). I am now at that point with D and will need to come up with a plan for both of us to get a better night's sleep.
It could be pure coincidence, but maybe not
Maybe he is just a baby that needs to be snuggled in tight to have a good nights sleep. I will try again tonight and see what happens. He is a puzzling case my D...he has self settled pretty much from birth and generally sleeps very easily during the day. He was great at night too until the last 2 months when things have started to deteriorate. So I'm not sure what the answer might be with him. I am happy to feed him if that's what he needs but I am not so convinced that is the answer at this point. Very different to L who had difficultly sleeping from birth and just could not self settle consistently for a long time.
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