Does it ever go?????

[Inertia]

Were do we draw then line...when do you know that your last baby IS your last baby?

I would like to know the answer to that myself. Sam was our last. Then Harry was our last. Now this bub is going to be our last.

While there are ways to make sure of that, I think that for me, losing that ability would be completely unbearable. DH does not want me to have to go through what is major surgery, either. He actually thinks its horrifically unfair that the government will pay for a woman to go through all kinds of surgery as birth control, but a vasectomy - which is safer, more effective, keyhole day surgery with a shorter, less traumatic recovery time - we have to pay for that. He is not happy about it at all.

Even then, when we were ready to pay for it, he backed out because he wasn't sure he was ready to let go of the idea of another baby. That was just after Sam. If he had, we wouldn't have little Harry and its impossible to think of life without him now. To not keep going, DH and I will both be fighting extremely strong maternal/paternal urges. I don't doubt it is going to be a very long road.

[mollycat]

How do you make that decision that there will be no more babies?

How do you cope when you just can't fall pg?

I recently said to someone in the last 20 years, I have fallen pg 3 times, unfortunately I only have two earth babies. The eldest of those is 17 next month OMG, my younger son is 12 in May. Is this the time to give up on my dreams? I have not used birth control since DS1 was about 12mo.

I have PCOS and even though I ovulate regularly, just can't seem to manage to catch that egg. DH refuses to go through further treatment - we've been as far as clomid (and tamoxifen), DS2 was a clomid baby, perhaps with something else we may be able to have another "take home" baby. I'll never know.

I work with children and one of these is only a couple of weeks older then my angel would have been had he/she survived. Somedays that is really hard.

We too, looked into foster care - a few years ago the first time - we pulled out for personal reasons, I've enquired again recently, however DH is not so sure that he wants to go ahead this time. I can cope with giving the child/ren back, but I don't know if I can cope with having no little bubs in my life. Maybe I need to wait for grandchildren (DS1 - I'm really in no rush LOL).

Maybe for some, this question is really easy to answer, but others just have this need to give, perhaps over time, this need lessens, but may never go away.