Well, I'm proud of what you did. I'm proud of me for screaming at DS when he doesn't sleep. Why am I proud? Because all I did was scream. I was brought up with physical punishment and for me to just shout and not hurt my son; that's an achievement. When a person is sleep deprived they often lose their temper and just shouting is wonderful. You can apologise for it and explain why it happened, but you still kept some self-control. Well done.