Lilias - she is jealous, and we know that. But i think there is only so much you can "Favour" her, without the other two getting upset and wanting their share of attention too ya know?

I hope my comments didn't upset you Mel, was just trying to offer suggestions and support. I know you do the best you can by all of your kids, I can only imagine how much work it all is. I'm exhausted with just one toddler and being pregnant!
Sounds like you are giving your DD plenty of one-on-one time....so it mustn't be that then.
I know you were offering suggestions - but sometimes its hard to hear suggestions when you already know what the problem is (plus I had a toddler in my arms whilst typing so had to be brief). We know she wants attention, we know she is jealous - hence the extra stuff we do with her. But I think the only solution to the problem (for her) would be to give the other two away and ya know - thats not an option. So how much more do I take from the other two to give to her?



has she ever had a hearing test????? or ears checked for fluid/glue ear??
She had a hearing test when she was born? But thats the only one so far. She doesn't suffer from ear infections that much, its the other two that seem to have that problem.

Def sounds like attention seeking in my humble opinion babe.... and its SO hard to address with other little ones, trust me....

Would she understand an "allocated" time? You can put a sticker on the clock at say 12pm, and tell her when the hands get there, she can pick what to do with mummy.. (doesnt matter if DS is there, but bub should b ein bed, and its her choice what you do) or pick a job, packing up, then its her turn to choose.. even pulling out paint and playdough, and saying "Your big now, you choose!"

It got so hard with mine I started to throw their toys out... if they done something they had just been told NOT to do, i would throw out a fave toy.. tears and tantrums, but when i threatrened it again, they knew I meant it, and they'd straighten up quick smart!!

Even just calling her a "big girl" can make a massive difference (sometimes!), and giving her a "job" when she looks bored.. even whispering that she is very big now, and ds1 cant do it, so can she please wipe the toilet.. give her a wet cloth and let her go... playing little games like this can distract from the nasty behaviour.. (again, sometimes!)

Good luck sweets, its so hard ..xoxoxoxoxo
I do stuff with her, gosh its sounding like everyone thinks I don't do stuff with her. I pulled out stuff today for her to do, when Eden was asleep so she couldn't wreck it on the older two, so we had a good morning, and then as soon as Eden was awake, the fights started. I don't do play doh when Eden is awake though, because DD1 just pulls it apart and puts it on the floor for DD2 to eat - which she knows she's not allowed to do, but doesn't stop her from doing it.

I wish I had the answers Mel . Sounds like you're having a really hard time with her. If you need a break from her, feel free to drop her off here for a couple of hours -I'm not just offering to be nice, I mean it!
Nah I couldn't do that to you guys - I think you guys have enough on your plate at the moment. Thanks for the offer though. I'd hate it if she started beating up your little man.