Div, call the parent help line if you dont know what to do in the middle of a tanty. I called in desparation when mitch was in timeout the other day. Its good for some backup, and when you aren't quite sure what you are doing 132289. Lovely people they are!

With timeout - they have to stay there until they are calm. At the 123 magic course I learnt some kids trash their rooms, vomit on command etc, but they have to stay there until they are calm. Then all is forgiven and you go on as usual.

Its really good for the 'nip it in the bud' theory of Cailin's, which I do think is a good philosophy and may well work as it isn't a long term behaviour thing. I have always been a nipinbud parent, it worked a TREAT with DD, when she got older she would take herself off to her room and come on out with a big smile and an apology.
I've sort of replied to you in my thread....these things aren't working with Mitch, I really need extra help. He is a great kid but I sometimes wonder if my very stressful emotional time when I was preg (brother died) contributed to his behaviour, my poor little man....