Bath, my Dads Dad hates me... Because I resemble his deceased wife, my grandmother!

He has always ignored me (well since her death almost 14yrs ago)...
My Mum has spoken poorly of him since & my Dad sticks up for his father, but will put me first as his daughter if there would ever be a confrontation between them over I... But he usually makes remarks to my Mum about my weight (I am a size 12)..
He adores my kids & smothers them with love but totally ignores me! Thankfully I am an adult & I ignore him back & dont force any conversation with him...

It is hard to be nice to someone when you see them hurting someone you love... I am guessing this is howyour DD feels, she sees the stress your Mum causes to you etc & she feels the tension...
If your Mum is disrespectful to your DD no doubt she will reciprocate the feelings!

I think your doing an awesome job...

Perhaps not discussing your Mum's bad points may help...

good Luck!!!