Thanks you guys. It is so hard to have confliciting emotions inside me about this subject. It is so easy to push these feelings aside and look at the positives of what I have done, but it doesn't take much to bring them out again. Now I am at the stage where I possibly wont have another chance to try again, I feel a bit wistful about that and a sort of loss IYKWIM, because I will never know if I could have made a go of it.

I would give anything to be able to say, "I BF my child for x amount of time".