Last night I asked the kids to brush teeth and DS was blowing up his thing from the fair, he turned to me and said "I will just finish this" normally I would get a bit cross but can see now that I haven't shown them respect so I said - ok but as soon as you finish go do teeth and he did!
That's great! For some reason, whenever they are not listening or talking back it makes me feel like I need to control them more. But all that does is result in more conflict and they are less likely to do what I say!! I was really skeptical that just talking calmly and listening would do anything in these kinds of situations until I tried it, but it actually really works! And so much nicer for everyone.