DD is being particularly difficult at the moment and the only thing that works is to either turn it into a task I need her to help with or make it part of a game e.g. we have to play schools all the time if I address it like I am teacher and she is pupil (e.g. That was a good school trip wasn't it Chloe or whatever name she is that day - lets get out of the school bus and go back into school for lessons). We get the not getting out the car alot - so the other thing is can you help me carry this or hold your brothers hand etc. Anything else just results in tantrum and more stubborness. Also I ask her what she thinks should do and often the answer is what I want her to do anyway (eg get out the car) but it has to be her idea. I figure the phase will pass eventually and it certainly keeps me on my toes keeping in character. :-)