Firstly I think you need to look for some activities that help you let off steam. Does your local YMCA have a crèche? Could you do Zumba or aerobics or swimming or spinning? I'm a hot head and I need to let off steam regularly otherwise I yell.

I would also look at ways you can bond with your dd. would you consider cosleeping? Or at least sitting and watching her sleep. When I went through a tough time with Dd after ds was born, I used to watch her sleeping and try and remember how young she really was.

As for the behaviour, I think it must be related to the upheaval in all your lives in general, but of course you can alter any behaviour that isn't acceptable. Perhaps you could try having an arrangement with her, where certain behaviour is rewarded, while other results in time out. Make it clear and even make a drawing or a chart so she can see what the agreement is...house rules as such.

Thinking of you