Separation anxiety...not him, ME!!!! Advice please!!

[krystals]

So it's been 11 months and almost 2 weeks and DS has spent all of his time with Mummy except for about 10 hours total when it was just Daddy.

I have 3 people close by that I would be happy leaving to care for DS but I just don't seem to be able to make the steps toward making it happen. I can always make excuses for why it won't happen. Yup, I'm the crazy lady who won't let her child out of her sight. I tell myself that it's easy, that I trust these people, but then I talk myself out of it again.

It's getting to the point where I know I have to do something soon, otherwise I'll never let go, and it'll be worse for all of us when I go back to work (not for a while yet). For people who have been in the same situation as I'm in, unable to physically remove yourself from your child's presence, but have needed to....what steps did you take to make it happen?

I wish my mum or sister in law lived closer. That way they would've had him ages ago (But I can say that, perhaps I'd still be in the same position!)

[crumpet]

hun i could have written ur post word for word

i to have big issues leaving DD, to the point where ill find any excuse under the sun to avoid it.

she has probably been looked after for a total of 10hrs by someone other than DH or I in her 8 month life its not that i dont trust anyone with her but to me its my job to look after her and be with her.

theres been many times where ive thought about organising a date night with DH and then push comes to shove and i dont go through with it

ive got no advice but i just wanted u to know ur definitely not alone!

[krystals]

thankyou!!

its not that i dont trust anyone with her but to me its my job to look after her and be with her.

This is what usually drives me away from whatever I've planned- how dare I go and get my hair done/watch a movie/go out for dinner/lunch/MARY POPPINS!!!! What kind of excuse is that to leave my baby who needs me? What if he needs some boobies??? Even though he goes most days 6-30am-6-30pm without them? LOL

I think I have a heightened sense of how much he actually needs me LOL. But that's what goes through my head.

[crumpet]

thankyou!!



This is what usually drives me away from whatever I've planned- how dare I go and get my hair done/watch a movie/go out for dinner/lunch/MARY POPPINS!!!! What kind of excuse is that to leave my baby who needs me? What if he needs some boobies??? Even though he goes most days 6-30am-6-30pm without them? LOL

I think I have a heightened sense of how much he actually needs me LOL. But that's what goes through my head.

i dont even have the boob excuse!

i know DD will be fine without me, the 3 times ive had to leave her she didnt bat a eyelid, but irrational me thinks "you never know..."

pretty sure i need her more than she needs me!

[krystals]

any ideas wonder mummies/daddies???

[NaeNae]

I hear you sister ...... aside from a few hours here and there and nights during this pregnancy I have ALWAYS been with DD. I only handed the night shift over to DH because I needed a break to sleep but if I hear her crying through the night I still wake up and sometimes get up and check they are alright.

DD was breast fed up until 2-3 weeks ago and we went cold turkey because I just couldn't deal witht he tongue flink nipple thing she started aside from a few other things.

I have my FIRST "girls night out" with my bestie this saturday night and I am spending the night away from home. I will be out early on Sat morning come home for a little bit then out again until maybe lunchtime the next day.

Part of me is DREADING being so far away from DD (1hr) for such a long time but another part of me is saying " its going to be a few years before you get to do this again"

I have no tips on how to deal with it, But I can tell you I feel horrid about the decision but I am in such need for some "me only" time before the next baby comes and before I get too big to travel longer distances.

If I remember to pop back and let you know how it goes I will

Nae x