now where i thought it was, i cannot find it, but will keep looking for you..
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now where i thought it was, i cannot find it, but will keep looking for you..
BellyBelly Life Subscriber
Well, you know, it's one of those things. There's information and there's responding to your specific circumstances. Ultimately only parents can know what their kids need. The problem comes when we are not in touch with our kids and our instincts and try to override or ignore those things, following arbitrary advice from some book (or whatever).
So, although none of us are perfect and we will all get things wrong from time to time, if we are in touch with our kids' needs and our instincts, then we will most likely muddle through in a fairly satisfactory manner. Having said that, it does also tend to help to have good information as well when making decisions.
So I'm glad you've found a way you're happy with.
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Great post, we did the same thing with our boys.
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Great post, and quite brave really! I have three kids and they have all settled in different ways. DD1 would self settle and snooze anywhere. We never had to contemplate settling methods as she would just close her eyes when she was tired. She slept 12 hours from the night we brought her home. We co-slept for about three years. Our choice, we couldn't bear to be parted from her for a whole night!
DS would show tired signs and would settle into bed but would then have what we referred to as 'the last hurrah' where he would grizzle for 1-5 minutes before dozing off. He was never distressed, just making noise and would settle very quickly. He would not co-sleep and would only settle in his own space. He slept in a bassinet and then a cot.
DD2 does not self settle. She likes to be rocked to sleep, preferably with a boob in her mouth. I have left her to self settle and have tried a modified CC but she becomes truly distressed (as opposed to shouting a bit!). I have persevered with self settling beyond what I am comfortable with in the belief that she will 'learn' self settling. She doesn't, she just becomes more and more distressed. So, I cuddle her to sleep, usually with a boob, and she sleeps in our bed.
I think you are doing a great job by listening to your own babies cues and meeting your babies needs. Every baby is different and as mum's we have to meet their differing needs by using a variety of methods.
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I think if we all just ditched the labels (CC or CIO) people could be more accepting of alot more. Because although there are a couple of EXTREME books out there promoting very firm guidelines; in 'my' experience most people use adaptive approaches that suit themselves and their children, and usually only after exhausting all other avenues.
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I agree with both of these posts. I think it is important to understand your child/ren and use whatever method is best for you & them. It is great to have different information and opinions too. Most of the time parents either need a different POV of support to know they are doing the right thing for THEIR family.
From what you posted Bloom, that is exactly what you have done and your little one is content with that.
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