Feeling nervous about sharing our news.

[myson]

Normally I am quite confident and self assured, but for some reason this is shaking me up a bit. Maybe its the hormones????

I am starting to feel a bit nervous about telling people we are expecting because....

I am an older mum. 35.

Our two kids are a bit more grown up. 11 and 8.

I have been very vocal in years past about " no thats definately it. no more kids for us"

No one evens knows we were TTC let alone considering another child.

We have many friends who are not able to concieve, or have concieved but then experienced losses.

We want to keep it quiet as long as possible. But maybe this is just me chickening out and trying to delay the inevitable. I think I need some good old BB unconditional support and encouragement that you are all famous for!

[LaDeeDa]

Congrats on your pregnancy myson!
You'll be fine and I am sure everyone will be thrilled for you! Everyone knows that people change their minds, especially as the other kids get older (my parents waiting 10 years to have my bro and mum was 47 when she gave birth)
I don't think your chickening out! Why not wait until you've reached 12 weeks - by then you'll be more adjusted too!!!

I hope you have a wonderful pg

[Pandora]

Do you have to tell people? Do you want to?
You could always just let them work it out for themselves when it becomes apparent.

[Heaven]

Another gorgeous baby is coming into the world, everyone will be happy about that!! How could you not be?
Sure, you might get some surprised looks and 'why?' questions but just remember that's because people will be surprised, not because of judgement because you've been telling them there's no more on the way!
Just make sure when you announce it you say how thrilled you are (rather than looking nervous waiting for their reaction) and people will be just as happy!!!!
A very exciting time myson, congratulations!!!!

[myson]

thanks Ladies. Good advice Sarajane.

i think it worries me a bit too (because i have so many rude, nosey inlaws) that there will be lots of people saying... "really... was that an accident?"

[Ellie]

Hi Myson
Don't know if it helps but I'll be 37 when our miracle bub is born...my inlaws pointed out to me that I'll be 67 at his/her 30th birthday...helpful???? I guess people will say what they want...so do what you want...if you don't want to tell...don't...it'll be pretty obvious soon enough!!! And remember...you ARE a confident contented Earth mother....I just love that

[studentmum]

We have DD's 5yrs and 7yrs because we left a gap and they're both girls the comments I've had are...

Wanted a boy did you?
Was that a bit of a surprise was it?



My DH and I have only JUST turned 28... some seem to think that I'm 'getting on a bit' or 'shouldn't you finish uni first'....

We always wanted lots of kids and the only thing stopping us was we were just busy and enjoying our girls - I love how everyone's an expert on pregnancy

Sarah

[studentmum]

We have DD's 5yrs and 7yrs because we left a gap and they're both girls the comments I've had are...

Wanted a boy did you?
Was that a bit of a surprise was it?



My DH and I have only JUST turned 28... some seem to think that I'm 'getting on a bit' or 'shouldn't you finish uni first'....

We always wanted lots of kids and the only thing stopping us was we were just busy and enjoying our girls - I love how everyone's an expert on pregnancy

Sarah

[mrsmac]

My children were 14 and 6 when DS was born so lots of people asked was he an accident- I just look at them in horror and say "no, he was planned" That usually shuts them up! I love my age gaps I have thoroughly enjoyed all of my kids cause they have been spread out. I know its not for everyone but it has suited me.

[Mumma2three]

My DD is 10 and DD2 is 2 and we're having our third. I still get asked if it was "planned". (I am 35). My cousin is 39 having her first, so my rellies have definitely not said anything to me this time around! It's mainly friends. I still find it the strangest question I've ever heard, I would NEVER ask someone...
35 is not old to be having your third. 31 is the average age for first babies these days, so you're well in the "average" age range.
I think it's wonderful, and I think you're sensible, you'll have two helpers now!!! Funnily enough I know someone having her third and her two are 10 and 8!! Not sure why she has the gap, but again, I think it's wonderful!! And Im all for gaps!! xo

[mrsmac]

I agree with the helpers bit, hey I even have a babysitter!!

[megs]

Hi Myson,

I hear what you are saying about not wanting to tell people. I remember when I announced I was pregnant with our 2nd son, because the age gap was so close I was constantly asked if he was an accident. Quite rude of people really.

I am hoping to hold on to my news for as long as possible, it feels like your pregnancy becomes everybodies business once it is announced and it is nice to have my own little secret growing inside me.

Good luck be prepared and tell people only when you are ready too.

[myson]

thanks everyone. talked to dh last night. he wants to tell people already!!!!! but we will definately wait til the 2 trimester at least. We are getting together with all the family when i am 15 weeks, so I may feel ready to share the news by then. Will be easier with them all together anyway, and its not an an event focusing on anyone in particular, just a lunch, so i wont be hogging someone eles limelight.

might just get DD2 to wear a "I am going to be a big sister" tshirt. and let the girls tell everyone the news.....

[Heaven]

That's a cute idea myson!!

[AliBaby]

Mrs Mac- I agree with you! I think it is so rude of ppl to ask was it planned or not! Is it any of their business? Nice way of handling it though!

[sassymummaof2]

i know how u feel although you are older, im younger and have the same troubles,
i fell pregnant unexpectantly at 17 , had my 1st daughter at 18 , i then tried for another when she was 9 months old, and had my son,
after he was born i fell preg on the pill, when he was only 4 months old,
we often get comments like,

omg you guys breed like rabbits, or dont u have a tv, u need to get a hobby ect ..

my 2nd daughter was born next , and only 3 months after she was born , she is 5.5 months now , i knew something wasnt right, it had happened again !

i know its not what many people chose and i certainly didnt , but my suprises are blessings, and iam in a perfect relationship of 5.5 years, engaged and own a house,
yet im looked at so badly by most people,

im 11, weeks 5 days today , and we are worried to even tell our parents who may think its too much this time, which makes it worse as i didnt want bubby ,

but i know exactly how you feel we are leaving it as long as possible to tell anyone to avoid all those comments which are stupid but do get you down, for as long as possible.

good luck with it all, just wanted to let you know there are others out there, young and older, it doesnt matter in the same situation as you

CONGRATULATIONS and all the best with you pregnancy .


sarah 21 - jason 27
dd-05
ds-07
dd2-08

#4 due 4th april 09 !!