i managed to have a good talk to my mum about Christmas - her preference is cold food, DH's preference is roast lunch. she's going to compromise and do a bit of both. normally she'd not give in to DH's traditions, but cos i told her i couldn't eat a lot of the salad type stuff we'd normally have (coleslaw and stuff) she is relenting. works for me - i'd prefer to have a decent roast any day!