Thankyou for all ur support. It is a very hard time but i am not 'desperate' to start TTC again soon, i mean i desperately want a baby but i know my body needs time like u have all said because i am both physically and mentally exhausted. I guess i am just terrified of this happening again and also of not being able to fall pregnant again as we would love t have a bubba next year, it's taking so long so i guess another few months waiting won't hurt if it means i have a better chance of carrying a healthy baby to full term and having them in my life, here on earth! Thanks again xoxoxo