for you calluna. I don't have all the answers for you but I can tell you that your not alone. I felt guilty about being happy to be pregnant again because that meant I was happy to lose our first bub. In my head, that is. It took longer to bond with this pregnancy. I think part of that is the fear that it might be taken from us again.
I'm 18+5, i still don't feel "safe" now and im still on constant wipe watch btw.