Pregnancy after Miscarriage or Loss June 2010

[angelfish]

ashie hun don't let what other people say get to you i know easyer said then done. I am going though the same thing when i got my frist scan they tech told me that i was due the 10th of feb when i went to get one done by the dr he tryed telling me that the report said the end weekend of january. But the dating and the weeks matched up with what the tech said. My day would have been shot by the hr went from 165 to 169 and it was the righted week and day that i was suppost to be.

AFM my ms had disapeared and i am not as sore so i am freaking out i know that i am 9 weeks and things can come and go but i have been pushed physical to my point the past couple of days.

[luna moth]

We're not finding out! It's a great big surprise! Although our favourite stallholder at our farmers market told us today that it's a BOY. And I trust him with a lot More than just organic passionfruit, so he must be right.

Wednesday was our angel-versary, which really spans the whole week. I wanted nothing more than for it to rain on the day, because it has rained on every significant angel date we have had. Then, on Wednesday at 1:00, I was at work and there was this little spit of rain, and I was listening to Eva Cassidy's "Somewhere Over The Rainbow" at the time. I had a little tiny cry (I was also surrounded by gorgeous sleeping babies, and that helped it along) Then when I left work yesterday, there was this enormous rainbow across the sky, and I felt so connected with our little bunny. Of course it could all be coincidence, but it never rains in Brissie winters, so I just don't reckon it was.

HPL - we have a Dutch cot coming to us! It's not heirloom or anything though. It's from some Dutch friends who are finished having babies. They have two gorgeous kids, and had two m/cs along the way so have been incredibly supportive for us. I had really wanted a cradle, I love them so much, but the cot offer came up, so we're going with that.
We have a lot of hand-me-down furniture for the nursery, all of it donated with a lot of love. So I'm trying to come up with ways to make it kind of "match" and I'm thinking about some of those wall sticker type things, or stencils. Not sure. Having fun though

[India's Mum]

Angelfish - my MS and soreness have come and gone since around the ninth week too. I feel so apprehensive everytime it subsides and then I have a big meal and feel awful again so I wouldn't worry too much about feeling a bit better. try and enjoy it. As for the rest, is there anything you can do with the kids that allows you some time to put your feet up, like getting a few good family movies for them? When I feel awful in the afternoons and have to lie down I put a movie on for DD and bring her toys and books into my bed so I can rest.

TimeforaFamily - Yea, Danni Minogue also reminds me of my last one who would have been due next week.

Dory - thanks for your support. I do need to rely on the OB a bit more and not feel as though I am bothering them with my questions and concerns.

HPL - You poor thing with the insomnia. It was probably the thing that made work the hardest for me when I was pregnant with DD. I would usually drift off around 3 so I wouldn't even bother to go to bed until 2am. I think I got more sleep once DD was born.

Ashie - Friends do put their foot in it at times. I don't see anything wrong with your scan results. If there was a problem your doctors would be telling you and they are perfectly happy with the result.

Audax - Beautiful story about the rainbow. It brought a tear to my eye too. It must have a been a very special moment for you.

Well, I am up to a very important week. I lost two babies at the 11th week so it's quite a nervewracking time. I know things could still go wrong but somehow I feel if I can just get through this week that things might be ok.

[ashie]

thanks i really wish the 1st trimester was easy lol, i think dh is saying a girl cause he really wants to use the girl name he picked out and i dont blame him its real pretty! im just going to stay on the fence until my appt with ob he'll do another scan and find the heart beat then ill be able to say boy or girl lol.

[Tegam]

Well, I am up to a very important week. I lost two babies at the 11th week so it's quite a nervewracking time. I know things could still go wrong but somehow I feel if I can just get through this week that things might be ok.

Its going to be an emotional week for you but im sure you will be brave and get a lovely reward!

[India's Mum]

Thanks Tegam, I am feeling optimistic. I realise now I had lost symptoms by this stage before I miscarried whereas I still seem to have most of them now including a really big belly! Wow, just read you had a home birth. Was that a great experience for you?

[Tegam]

Oh Sammy it was the best. I had had two nice hospital birth so it wasnt like i was running away from any trauma, but i just found homebirth was so gentle and just felt 'right' for our family and the other children. We are planning another homebirth for this little one!

[possum magic]

Still lurking a bit, thanks Dory. Oh it'll be hard with your furbaby away but you will get there. Your DH will have to pass on your cuddles.

SammyP I had to stop by and say i'm thinking of you this week. It must be scary i know but the odds are still on your side and your pg symptoms sound reassuring. Sending you powerful sticky vibes!

Ashie: so upset for you that your friend made that comment. Why did she think she knew better than the specialist who did the scan? Very unhelpful. Enjoy looking at your pink and blue outfits and wondering which one you'll get to use!

Audax: What a beautiful story about your angel-versary and rainbow baby.

HPL: Yes, insomnia is hard and i remember with DD longing for her to be born so i could sleep comfortably again...even if it was only for a few hours at a time!

Not going to go too far back to do personals there are (fortunately) lots of lovely ladies in here right now: but wanted to say Belly rubs to all.
AFM: m/c is complete i think. Took about 3wks all up and no d & c so i'm very relieved (last one took 3mths). Feeling sad at the mo but hoping to be back here one day soon.

[milly5]

Hi ladies!

Dory - hello! and I hope your furbaby's treatment goes well. I know how much I would miss my furbaby if she was away from me for three weeks, so I am sending you some of her purrs - can you hear???

HPL - I know what you mean about the insomnia!!! URGH!!! I stagger out of bed this morning, and announce to DH that "I HATE BED" I hate lying down (reflux) I cant lay on my side (either side, clicky hips), shouldn't lay on my back but find that I end up half sitting half lying on my back (I think that this is thw worst possible position to be in, isn' it? I manage about 1 1/2 hours then I wake, and I am getting 2 or 3 of those a night. I am exhausted! Then, if I do fall asleep during the day or even at night, I am having really wierd dreams. They say it is to help you get ready for staying awake at night with the baby. I am going to be dead on me feet when it gets here I think!

Angelfish - I hope you are resting!

Audax - our furniture is a mix-match of older restored pieces and a couple of new things. I think for us the common theme is that they all belong to the baby! LOL! The items are mostly white, and I have put some transfers and things on them but each item has a different coloured "trim" as I wanted some bright colours to go with the white.

Ashie - Yay for your scan results! I have no idea either re the boy or girl! I have everything in white, green or yellow.

Sammy - yay for feeling optimistic! yay for pg symptoms!

Teagam - a home birth sounds fab! unfortunately for us - we live in the sticks, so no-one would come here and its a bit too far from town/hospital if things don't go smoothly.

possum - I look forward to seeing you back here soon too! I am glad that your m/c is complete - at least avoiding D&C is some small consolation. 3 months would have been an ordeal.

Hello to everyone else and sorry to those I missed!

AFM - 31 weeks. Yes WOW Dory is a good way to describe it.
I still have morning sickness (damn it!). I am finding it really hard at the moment. Because, as I am sure you all understand, we so wanted this bub, and were devestated at the loss of our angels, I always imagined that I would just lurv being pg. Well I don't, dare I say it, I hate it! So as well as the MS, I have reflux, so I can vomit at night too. And I have huge swollen feet. I have to monitor my BP to make sure it is not the beginings of pre-eclampsia, but fortunatley BP although a little high is OK. I mean, I don't want the baby out by anymeans, I just want to be able to be happy and glowing and enjoy the pg, and then I feel so guilty for feeling, well, like crap. I am so tired. I have got "clicky hips" (Pelvic Girdle Dysfunction), so my sacro-illiac joints click in and out, and my symphis pubis feels like I have spent a month on a horse. So it hurts to sit. It hurts to ly down, on either side. I can lay on my back for a while, but even that is painful, and you're not supposed to lay on your back when pg anyway. Even with pillows all around me, if I do fall asleep, I find that I have chucked them all out of the bed and when I wake I find I am laying on my back.
I have also been told that For swollen feet - sit or ly with your feet elevated.
For reflux, sit or ly with your head and shoulders elevated.
How do you do both? GRRRR
sorry ladies, that's just how I feel.

Having said that, We booked in to the hospital last week, so that made it all very real, and was very exciting. But it was also triggery too. The room they sent me into was the room that I had to go in when I had my m/c last year, and it was all a bit de ja vous and I started to cry, and feeling emotional couldn't stop. The midwife was really good, especially when I told her how horrible I was finding pg, and how guilty I was feeling because of it. I mean I know I have to go this journey to get the reward at the end, I just wish the journey itself could be enjoyable too, IKWIM? I mean, I spent first trimester spewing and scared of m/c. I spent second trimester spewing and scared, and then now I am passed 30 weeks, and can relax somewhat, I am just overwhelmed with even more spewing and exhaustion and pain. Why can't this be fun?

sorry for my moan ladies. I really am, and I hope it's not too triggery. I know it sounds selfish to those who have just lost their angels, and those at the beginning of their journey, and I really don't mean it to be, so I hope you forgive me my moan.

Bellyrubs.

[timeforafamily]

Dory – About the pins and needles, Vitamin B6 may help, but definitely ask your OB about that. Maybe I do too much reading. Which fingers does it tingle in most? If it’s in the little finger and ring finger it’s more to do with ulnar nerve compression (funny bone). If it’s in the thumb and first finger it can be more to do with carpal tunnel syndrome which is related to swelling of hands from no movement eg. When we are asleep. Worse on waking. Otherwise it may be brachial nerve compression, coming more so from shoulder armpit area. Just being reading about all this because I’ve had tingling in my R) hand. Or just blame the whole thing on being nearly 30 weeks pregnant, you go girl. Just hope it doesn’t bother you too much.

I want to stay and chat, but know it's better for me to get to bed right now. Got our 6 week 5 days U/S in the morning, then work in the afternoon. Cheers all

[timeforafamily]

Me again,

Dory – poor putty cat. Won’t she be so glad to see you when that ordeals all over, lot’s of meowing on that day.

Ashie – well I really do wonder how accurate those measurements are with CRL. Bubs could be turned any sort of way, and the angles would change the lengths. Feel free to take some of those sort of comments like water off a ducks back.

Angelfish – hope you are still feeling pregnant and not freaking out about loss of m/s symptoms.

Audax – it’s great that you can make connections like that. So soothing for the soul. We need more of that.

SammyP – Hooray for your really big belly!

Tegam – I’m glad you feel comfortable about going the homebirth option. My SIL had her 3rd at home in a nice warm pool in the middle of her lounge room. The two older kids were woken up in the middle of the night to share the experience. My 10 year old nephew was just too tired to really remember but my niece has some amazing memories that will stay with her.

Possum magic – I’m glad your body knew what to do.

Milly5 – well no one would want what you are having to deal with right now, so you are totally allowed to moan. You are sure giving me a reality check about the need to organise time off work. Are you able to sleep in a recliner chair perhaps?

AFM - Today we had our 6 week 5 day scan and all is well. One little bubs, not two, in a big black watery sack. It’s all a bit surreal at the moment. The doc wasn’t able to measure the CRL. Something I thought was so important. Well the little heart beat was all I needed to hear, 124b/min. My partner videoed the whole thing. The doc was having a hernia, asking him to sit in the corner on the red chair in the dark, which wasn’t a good viewing point. I think she was concerned that he would get footage of an ultrasound probe up my duff. He has been really pro-active with the camera the whole way through. Stepping into all the appointments and all the last minute consultations on the day of EPU with the camera. The nurses or doctors just turn around and he has the camera rolling. And he says, you don’t mind do you? I don’t think they know how to react. Although, for this FET I got really annoyed with him because he wouldn’t sit down and the embryologist was about to walk into the room with the pipette of precious embryos loaded in it.

Anyway, back to today, the ultrasound views and photo she gave us was so blurry. The poor doc was running an hour and a half behind, running out of ultrasound gel and kept on saying congratulations maybe to get us out of her room sooner. It really made me think about going private.

I’ve been head-achey for about 3 days now, and that’s totally not like me. I’ve got a sore throat, so I may have the start of a cold. I had my Vitamin D levels checked and they were really, really low, so now I’m catching every bit of sun I can get. Even looking at the weather report. Today, the scan ran late, therefore I wasn’t going to have much time at home to get ready for work. I just thought, stuff it, I need my sun, so while I was meant to be at work, I spent 20 mins at home catching some rays. Where is the career girl gone? Pregnancy head in overdrive today! I didn’t even apply for a job promotion either, which was due in today. And I feel so comfortable about that too...... Well maybe it's the tiredness and intermittent nausea having something to do with it.

[angelfish]

thanks everyone yes i have been trying to relax i let the housework go alittle bit then b/f came home and called me useless for him and his kids when i have taken his kids out to dinner once and ice cream twice sicne they have been here that hurt me so badly. but the m/s has disapeared and i had a bit of of engery boost today and i am so scared i cant get another scan until the last week of the month which to me is too faraway. but lucky the girls go home tommorow and then i can rest.

[luna moth]

TFAF - that's great news on your little heart fluttering away!

I'm just watching my scan DVD again now. Everything went well today, baby behaved reasonably well. The placenta is sitting low enough to be low grade placenta previa, but if that's the worst news I get all day, it's still awesome. So that's a huge hurdle that we're over! I might think about starting to relax....
The rest of the day sucked though. Just exhausting, and I am finding full time work so tough, even with everyone's support. Two and a half weeks to go though, and I'm increasingly thinking I won't work at all past that point.

[~MummaBear~]

Hey guys, i know i dont come in here very often but i am stressing out right now. I have my scan tomorrow and i am so worried that the same thing is going to happen. I have been having nightmares agout the scan for a week now and i am feeling like i am going to be sick. the stupid thing is i know bub is alive right now, i can feel kicking but my stupid head wont stop playing the what if game... how on earth do you relax before a scan??

[luna moth]

mo4 - I don't relax before a scan! I could just about vomit before every single one. This morning it was only the fact that I was running late that actually saw me striding through that door - I was so distracted that I forgot to be worrying my pants off. I have played the what-if game for weeks - maybe that's not actually kicking? maybe it's something else? What if that leftover soup I ate wasn't hot enough? I was also briefly convinced there was a hole in my uterus (sooooo stoopid, but true) and the baby had slipped out and that's why I could feel kicks, and then thought they'd find nothing at the scan

Will be thinking of you tomorrow hun! (actually, I'll be thinking of my bed all day long, sooo tired, but I'll make sure you feature in my thoughts too! xxx)

[angelfish]

audax -before scans i get so nervous i cant even think i get in a bad mood just thinking that something that is going to go wrong.

afm i had a couple of semi good days not today i am super tired and m/s is setting in once again

[Tegam]

Hey guys, i know i dont come in here very often but i am stressing out right now. I have my scan tomorrow and i am so worried that the same thing is going to happen. I have been having nightmares agout the scan for a week now and i am feeling like i am going to be sick. the stupid thing is i know bub is alive right now, i can feel kicking but my stupid head wont stop playing the what if game... how on earth do you relax before a scan??

I am always scared before a scan. I work myself up that much that i cry all the way there and am a blubbering mess when i leave too! Lucky DH is so understanding!

[Hoping]

Angelfish - i'm so sorry you are having such a hard time with your b/f, i hope you know you have whole bunch of ladies here to listen to and support you when you need it. As for the m/s, i am about 8 weeks at the moment and the end of last week my m/s completely disappeared for 2 days and i started to worry and then it came back 10 fold and i have been pretty much in bed since so i wouldn't read too much into it.

TFAF - great news on your scan. Its great to see your hubby is so excited. Do you think he will be down the 'business' end when the baby arrives with the video camera in hand?

AFM - i have my scan tomorrow after my initial scan only showed the egg sac. I am crossing my fingers that everything is ok. I really hate waiting!