I also think what you are feeling is very normal. I didn't feel maternal at all when I was pregnant for the first time, and even after giving birth, those nurturing feelings do not always come straight away. But while you are right, being a mum is hard work and it does involve a lot of nappy changes and lack of sleep, there are also many many positives. I agree with em - it must be hard when the people around you are being negative about it, but try to focus on the positives, and don't compare yourself to other people - their experience does not have to be your experience. The same goes for labour too - it is scary, but I think if you read a lot and do the classes etc - just inform yourself about it, it will help you feel a bit more prepared and in control.
Having a baby does not mean your life will be over - your life will be very different, yes, but not necessarily in a negative way.
Ive had similar times where i feel like this...
However im so sorry to read about your mum not caring about you, thats terrible.
My 2 closest sisters turned their backs on me, and didnt want to know me when i told them i was pregnant. All because im not married to my DP yet.
They rideculed me, and sarcastically wished me luck, telling me i would fail, and that they felt sorry for the poor baby inside me..
It hurts when someone so close can say things like that, especially when i was hoping for their support...
My mum was shocked, but has been great, never once did she get angry or turn her back...shes been so supportive.
All i can say is im sure its just hormones, an these feelings will soon go away when you see your gorgeous miracle....
Your also very lucky to have such a supportive partner, who is obviously anxious to meet his daughter, as he talks to your tummy, which is so cute.
Try to forget the negatives, and look forward to the positives. The great future ahead of you and your partner.
I get worried at times if i have made the right decision..i get scared i may lose my old life, and be trapped bringing up a baby, in a house, with no where to escape...
but its all part of that wonderful thing called life...youll be fine....
xxx all the best
I feel better reading your comments. I don't really think I'm surrounded by negative people. I think the problem is I have no one to talk to (my best friends here have all gone home, the latest one this morning) and so I am focusing on the negatives. There are so many unknowns. I guess it's all gotten on top of me these past few days.
I haven't read all the comments so sorry if I cover what someone else has said.
How you are feeling is so normal.....
I remember being about 30 weeks and after spending the afternoon with my friends completely feral children coming home and saying to DH "What have I done - I don't like children!! and completely freaking out for about the next fortnight.
It all passes - and when you see your bubba you don't even realise.
this is my first, and im not really that far along but i do have moments when i freak right out..
"what have i done?" "Im not ready!!" "Im not gonna be a good mum!" "i can barely look after myself!"
I get scared sometimes coz i dont want to fail and i want my babies to love me and DH coz i know we will try our hardest to be awesome parents. Then i look at my own parents, i despise my father and my mother and i have always had a rocky relationship.. did they try? like us? and di they fail terribly like im scared im going to?
Its so hard coz its the unknown, but i do know one thing, i LOVE my baby more than anything in this world already and i havent even met her yet, i know that she will always love me coz i will NEVER do anything to make that not so.
Yeh, i might suck at cooking, and i may not have a career that i would like her to be proud of, but we will give her the best that we can, DH is super excited to meet her, he keep telling me to hurry up and make her faster :P hehe he's so cute!!
Sweety, you'll be fine, and its all normal. being away from so many supportive people must be hard
But we're all here for you if you ever need to talk xxx
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