I didn't find our with my first 2 boys. With my 3rd pregnancy we chose to find out as I was worried about gender dissapointment.
As you can see we did in fact have another boy, I found it helpful as I dealt with my dissapointment at not having a girl and was able to bond with him. We however chose not to tell anyone so for everyone else it was still a surprise.
If I have a 4th (which I'm hoping for) I really don't know what to do, as I must say I much prefer the surprise of not knowing, but if it was to be another boy I would hate my inital reaction at the birth to be slight dissapointment.
We found out at the 20 week scan with DD and we loved knowing we were expecting a baby girl and noone else knew!!!! We kept it a secret but it was hard keeping it a secret at times!! but we did well.
DH really wanted to know so he could get his head around it all, just knowing what it was would help him bond in 'his' way.....so I let him.
I must say, knowing the sex, definitely helped me with bonding with the baby too!!! It really did.
But this time around I said I didn't want to know, want a surprise this time and he agreed that was fair. So yeah, we are waiting til the birth!!
I am glad we will have experienced it both ways....
I didn't find out for the first two...I was quite happy for it to be a surprise.
But I found out for the other 5...for several reasons:
- So we could name bub and the other kids would know them by name and maybe bond a bit before birth.
- So I could get organised rooms, clothing, bedding etc.
- Because the older I got the more impatient I got
i had to find out with all of mine, there is no way i could last the full 40 weeks not knowing!
we have enough trouble deciding on one name, let alone one for a boy and one for a girl. i did have recurrent dreams with dd tho that they told me the wrong thing at the scan, i panicked and spent the last 2 weeks running arround getting green, yellow and white clothes as in my dream we had a beautifull little boy, and nothing but girls clothes for him! i never ended up using any of them tho!
DH and I have always said we wouldnt find out and have a surprise. it doesnt bother us either way, and i'm so easy going and laid back i'd prob just dress my boy in pink and vise versa if thats how it happened and it wouldn't bother me. DH didn't findout out with his last 3 children, and they even picked names that could be unisex, (which strangly worked out perfect that the more boy name was a boy and for the next kid the more girl name was a girl..)
I think if i had twins, i would want to know if they were the same or different...but still wouldnt want to know what, itms.
well i had it both ways without a choice with DS he had his legs wide open so we could see the lot we were so happy coz we wanted a boy with DD we couldnt see coz she had the cord in between her legs and i was so annoyed that i couldnt find out i had a feeling she was a girl but i couldnt say it out loud but everyone else said girl but when she was born DH almost had a heart attack he thought she was a boy but the cord was still around her leg cheeky girl lol the reason i wanted to know is coz i like to be organised
Because where I live is so limited with super cute baby clothes and nursery equiptment I wanted to find out. I made a trip to Melbourne (home) with an empty suitcase at about 6 months UTD and went crazy at the baby shops! I'm going to find out with this one too because I really think it's a boy and I only have really girly stuff! I'll have to get cot sheets and such so he doesn't get stuck with hot pink and fairies
I wanted to have a surprise with DD but i had this overwhelming feeling that i was carrying a girl. Then when i got closer to 20 weeks i had people saying it was a boy as i was carrying all out the front so it was i had to prove them wrong!
I will find out with our next one, and if its a boy and we choose to have anymore i will leave it as a surprise as we would have both.
BellyBelly Life Member - Love all your MCN friends
Jun 2004
The Festival State
3,008
i didn't choose to find out
idiotic specialist who did the amniocentesis, after being told by me that i didn't want to know the gender - handed me a page of results, all the pairs of chromosomes etc.
bit hard to miss the XX.
not happy jan, i was planning on finding out when bilby arrived.
i hear you on the "not going shopping" after baby has arrived angle. i did stacks of opshopping for sizes 0000 to 2 whilst pregnant (and lucky i did, cos bilby's delivery was "very eventful" to put it politely.
keep price tags and receipts for baby stuff you buy, so at a pinch, you can get refunds/exchanges.
there is alot of neutral unisex stuff and things that don't really matter. or get white things, to dye, as soon as you find out.
you'll get stuff given to you when baby is born too, i didn't account for that as i didn't have a baby shower.
You could do "research" now, take photos and details of what you like, so if you want them later, you have already done the hard yards. You could give photo and details to a helpful dh/relative/friend and they go off and get it for you.
Great thread we are having this discussion now with the twins we found our but now we have a boy and a girl and all the baby stuff associated with each i would really like a surprise this time.. now to convince DH But saying that we both think its a boy!
We have found out all 3 times. Lots of reasons.
-I am very impatient and DH is an engineer and really likes to be organised.
-We are both scrooges when it comes to money so I wouldn't have been able to spend money on pink or blue stuff without knowing the gender, and didn't want a whole wardrobe of unisex stuff.
-In my opinion the birth is surprising enough, this way I get a surprise half way through the pg, and then I get the surprise of meeting my baby at the end. And TBH, checking the gender of my babies when they were born was the last thing on my mind, I just wanted cuddles.
-This time though there was the extra consideration of DS1. He is old enough to understand sister vs brother and was adamant that he wanted another brother. I had considered not finding out this time, but changed my mind as I didn't want DS1 to have to deal with gender disappointment when the baby arrives. Lucky I did find out cause this one is a girl and he wasn't impressed when he was told. It hasn't taken him long to come around, but I am glad I wasn't dealing with his shock at the same time as bringing home the new baby.
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but we did well.
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