Antinatal class has terrified me, don't think I can do this now!
We had our antinatal class today and the morning was all about labour and birth. The information was delivered in a way that made me terrified. It was as if they focused more on the details of the really scary parts like tearing, medical intervention and she even went into detail about how they think that the baby is also traumatised by the experience.
Yes it was information but there was no balance. I felt myself panic and I even looked paniced and she seemed to think that was funny. I was actually looking forward to it and hoped to come home feeling more confident. Instead I have come home feeling like I need to book myself in for an elective C Section.
The afternoon was however great! A different lady, more positive lady showed us how to bath a new born with a real baby that was born just yesterday. She was so cute and I just couldn't believe how easy she was to bath, and wrap etc. I feel confident that I can do all that its just the bringing my baby into the world that I don't feel confident about now.
I dont think I will get much sleep tonight, I am scared I will have nightmares.
I just needed to vent and wonder if anyone else has experienced this kind of eduction.
i was also terrified. seeing that dvd at the class i was like "oh no, im NOT doing that". But hay when u go into labour u cant wait to get to all that stuff coz when u do it means ur going to be holding ur bub in ur arms real soon. Any which way u deliver ur baby its going to hurt.. before and after. I went through the labour and the emergency csection and the pain after it was horrific. I would have loved giving birth naturally.
I believe once u go into labour u will have an amazing strength. I dont know where us woman get it from but we do. U will be impowered and u will birth ur beautiful bub and once u got bubbi in ur arms and he looks up at u as if to say "oh hi there mum", all the pain and whatever happened will instantly vanish.
They need to tell you those things but please don't be scared because of that. Try and focus on the journey overall and holding your bub in your arms. Grrrr at that person who took the class for thinking it was funny to scare you like that!
Also seeing as you have plenty of time between now and the birth try and source out some gentle birthing DVD's or books. Youtube also has plenty of gentle natural births to view and help you see that it's nothing to be scared of.
I'm hanging out for the birth of my bub...anytime now little one
Oh, hun, son't be scared! Really birth isn't that bad! And honestly it's often the frame of mind you are in which can make it or break it. With my first birth I was so unprepared for it and having never done it, I was unsure and unconfident in myself. Having gone into hossy with a little (I mean tiny) amount of amniotic fluid leaking and ending up being admitted and having my baby the next day by induction. I was really unprepared and nervous and didn't come to terms with things, ended up being in labour for almost 24hrs and pushing for 3hrs!! I have gas and 2 pethadine shots because things went for so long and I hadn't mentally prepared myself to be in labour then at all let alone for so long.
My second birth, I had pretty bad prelabour for about a week, I was in serious labour for I don't even know how long cause I was just trying to go with it all, plus I had a wonderful doula helping me through it all. I went to hospital the day I gave birth to get some panadeine forte to try to sleep a bit and the midwife checked me and I was 8cm dilated! I wasn't in pain at all at that stage, though had had some serious contractions for several hours. I had laboured BY MYSELF (DH was at a soccer game!) and had managed on my own, having baths, using heat packs etc... to releive my pains. My birth was beautiful and perfect and I had no painrelief at all. My DS was born a few hours afer admission and after the midwife broke my waters. This time I was completely prepared and ready to birth, hence the huge difference in births. It is great to be prepared for the what if's, but go into it positive!
If I have another bub, I will be confident in myself and know I can do it, on my own if need be!
Be confident women are meant to birth babies and you CAN do it!
I have not had a VB so I cannot comment on what it 'feels' like, however I can share that I did not have any fear when I was pregnant in regards to having a natural birth, I did however fear a CS (and unfortunatly this is what I had) I did not attend a antenatel class as I heard that they can scare some women, I chose to educate myself. Read all you can on gentle birthing and do have a look at the you tube clips as Raven suggested there are some truly amazing ones on there., and some amazing women at that. Also have a read of the below thread, if you haven't already, even if you only read the posts from 'Blue Daisy' it is very informative.
Although I had a wonderful CS experience after all and it was completely pain free I do plan on trying for a VBAC next time. It is such a sacred experience and as I'm sure you have been told many times, this is what our bodies were designed to do. You will be great and before you know it you will be holding your little bundle in your arms.
Hi Puppies.
Myself and my partner had a private class (3 hours straight) and it was great but we were showen VERY graphic images and I left feeling like there must be some other way that the baby could come out.!!
But the truth is, there is no other way, and the baby is coming out no matter what.
The best way that I found to think about it was that it is one or two days out of your life that you will be in some pain and discomfort... ok I am suger coating it slightly lol.
But really, its one or two days. Then its all over. And you wont forget the pain entirely but it sure comes a distant second when you finally get your baby.
I have a 6 month old now and was worth the pain and more.
I wish you all the best and remember, on the few nights when you feel a little scared, you have all your friends here to talk about it.
I could have typed exactly what you did when i had my first class before DD1 was born, in fact i think i said similar things in my then Belly group about my feelings! I walked out of the hospital at the end petrified and wanting to find a way out of giving birth all together, c/s included..but really...once your there on D day everything is so different and its all ok. It might sound all scary and daunting but let nature take its course and dont over think it.
I skipped antenatal "care" classes for this reason!
Hun you are going to get more and more pregnant and those wriggles and kicks you feel every day are going to become pounding feet and fists. The little baby inside is going to grow and grow until you are so big with it you feel you might be more baby than woman! And when you rub your big belly and feel those strong feet and hands you're going to know how STRONG your baby is, and how STRONG you are together.
Life gets uncomfortable. Sleeping gets harder. Your hugeness dominates your thoughts and actions, the baby looms large in your mind. The connection between you is strong and you will begin to long and long to feel those limbs wriggle in your arms, to look into the fresh eyes of your baby and say hello. You're going to want this so so much, and on the day you feel your first contraction the FIRST thing you will feel is excitement - your baby is coming, your time is now.
As each wave surges through you you will feel so many sensations and emotions. Yes, there will be pain. Not a pain you have imagined or thought of, a pain you have never encountered, and remember it well because it is the pain of womanhood, it is your gift to your baby and to yourself. I know, it takes a lot to wrap our western pain-medicated minds around the concept of a gift of pain, but it is just that. Ask yourself "WHAT do i feel?" I did that and it really helped, because yes, i felt pain, but not only pain. How was your first time at sex? Was there a pain, a tightness, and then a yielding and through the pain a suggestion of the pleasure that makes every living thing that does it do it? There are moments in labour when it hurts AND it feels good, but if you sit thinking "it hurts it hurts!" you might miss them. DON'T deny pain, but do ask what else you feel.
Make sure you're well-supported. Try to have an attendant who believes in you and in birth. Even my XP was surprisingly wonderful at this (it doesn't HAVE to be a doula). At some point i was hanging in desperation at the velocity of my labour over the edge of the bath shouting "i can't do it" and he looked at me very calmly and said "you ARE doing it."
Labour teaches us to live in the moment. Labour is only ONE contraction long - the contraction you're having. None of the others passed or coming matter, just the one you're having. Live in the moment. If you divide labour into contractions and breaks you get LOTS of rest, USE it. Relax between contractions and praise yourself for your progress. When you are holding your newborn you will really appreciate what labour taught you about living in the moment because they grow SO fast and you're going to want to DRINK every moment with them.
Ever since you were born you have been doing First Things. First breath, first cry, first poop, first feed, first smile, first solids, first step, first bikeride, first day at school, first relationship, i could go on. This is your first baby. You have risen to a million challenges in your life, and some of them you won't even have THOUGHT of as challenges, and you have succeeded. Your baby is inside you and birth is something you WILL do. Not can or can't. WILL. It's not going to be easy because things worth doing rarely are. It's going to be difficult and challenging and the most wonderful, worthwhile, joyous achievement of your life. Until you have your next one
Gosh that doesnt sound like you had a good class. Was this at the hospital run classes? What hospital is it?
Our classes were ok - but i now know that the hospital run classes just didnt prepare me for birth ata ll. I got way more info through Bellybelly and reading REAL stories.
Antinatal class has terrified me, don't think I can do this now!
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