Keeping your DH & DP happy in the bedroom!

[frankie]

Hey guys,

I have Spd which is real sore and I cant perform with my DP so I just wanted to ask, what are you guys doing to keep you DP's and DH's happy in the bed. If you know what i mean? Even if you dont have spd maybe you might have other problems.

I feel really bad for him cos i know he wants the love and attention but wont ask for my sake cos he knows im sore. How are you guys keeping your men Happy?

[Cricket]

Have you tried different positions? I think some find that spooning, or rear-entry positions are much easier on aching pelvic joints and big bellies in general.

BTW - I had a little giggle at the title - good luck keeping your DH and DP happy in the bedroom. That might be more than any woman could handle.

[Lily J]

Have to admit that I laughed at the title too!!!
Agree with Cricket that some new positions are handy - this might sound weird, but if you use a BIG stack of pillows under you chest and hips, that makes rear entry a litle more comfortable and makes you feel a little more supported. Also -This might be a bit too personal, but maybe you could do all the non-penetrative sex stuff... um, ahem, like oral...
I don't think you'd have to get in an uncomfortable position for that and your DH could return the favour without aggrevating your condition I think?
Anyway, just some suggestions.
Good luck,
Lily

[meow]

I keep my H quite happy in the bedroom- sleeping

I don't have any special complaints but with someone banging away from the inside on my pelvis and cervix already I am sooo not interested so we sleep.

[Kitt3n]

funny title - Keeping DP AND Dh happy in the bedroom, made me think "huh! lucky girl!!".

then i read the post, you poor thing!!

soz, just made me smirk

[Kitty33]

Very good idea with the pillows to support you for rear entry...... (he he he)
I used 5 pillows!! It was good for support...... and while we are talking about it when u r DTD with your pillows underneath... it helped that I gave myself a bit of a tickle while we were DTD from behind....
OMG i cant beleive I am typing this!! HE HE HE....
I found it helped sooo much to relax the muscles on the inside and made it very very very much more enjoyable for me

Good luck honey
xox

[AnyDream]

hehehe @ title!

Well, I had SPD and my hot tip is to keep him happy Very Infrequently...that way when he gets it it's so mind-blowingly good that it outweighs the fact it's not very often LOL.

Not a solution for everyone, but really ladies, we're talking about weeks and months of his life, not an eternity!

[lismith25]

I agree go the rear option, I have found being on my back is just too painful. Dh is actually being really good about it, he knows that I am not in the mood and I think hormonally it is making him not in the mood either. Thank God ...its hard enough getting out of bed to go the loo every 30mins never mind dtd

[~kaos~]

Naked cuddles and help him help himself.... along with all the other suggestions

[Jas]

Hi,

Well this is a little personal but I found a chinese position can't remember if it was in a pregnancy book or if it was on one of those foxtel birth shows but DH and I found it really great during pregnancy. I'll so my best to explain it. so woman lies on her back and puts her legs up bent (imagine you are sitting on a chair except horizontal) so say you head in at the head of the bed and your feet are down the end then DH or DP lays on his side facing you across the bed and you rest your calves on him and well I'm sure you can figure out the rest!!

Feel free to pm me or ask for clarification if that doesn't make sense!! We found it really great because I was...lets say in the mood quite a bit and we were still active up until the day I went into hospital to be induced and it was great not too exerting for a tired preg lady but your tum doesn't get squished

[frankie]

hey guys,

Thanks for the tip jas, Funnily enough my dp was checking th email and read your reply and laughed cos we already do that position. Ha Ha Ha. Its really cute he said " hey your friends replied to your post and they suggested that thing that we do". very funny. Its kinda cute when he gets involved cos he checks my posts and reads them and pretends he doesnt find it interesting when he really does. hehe

I also wanted to mention that im in so much pain that i cant enjoy anything sexually, my clitoris hurts, my breasts,the inside of my hoo haa. Its all way too painful, so i try to give him oral as often as i can. Being in this much pain is it normal symptoms for SPD?

[Cricket]

I don't think the pain you're mentioning is because of SPD specifically, but more just being a little more tender due to the extra blood flow in those areas in pregnancy. Maybe try going very slowly, (explain the issues to your DH, although if he's reading this thread, then I guess he already knows! Hi Mr. Frankie! ) communicating clearly about what is good and what is not good,and use something as a lubricant? And have him stay away from the boobs if they are very sore.
HTH!

[Jas]

lol thats funny frankie! Well that sucks a bit doesn't it! Well I reckon at this point you should just chamge the title of the thread and make it up to him to keep himself happy in the bedroom lol

[Schmickers]

In all honesty, any sexual intimacy (and I don't mean just sexual intercourse) with love behind it is appreciated during pregnancy. Even if it's just holding, kissing and cuddling while we DIY, I'm sure most guys would appreciate that as a satisfying alternative to sex...

[Macca79]

It took DH a while to get that sex was not enjoyable for me as I experienced alot of pain, particularly now in the later stages. So I made a point to have what I call 'cuddle nights'. I give him a massage or just stroke his back and he does the same for me. It's not so much about physical release but accepting that we are both at a changing time in our lives but still having time to connect.

I know for me I felt guilty for a while because I had no interest what so ever in any type of sexual experience but DH did so for a long time I just did what ever to 'keep him happy' but I thought at the same time I wasn't being fair to me either. So we talk about it now. If I'm in the mood to give him a hand so to speak, I can't have intercourse now too painful, I do but when Im keen otherwise it becomes a chore for me.

I hope you find an answer to your problem that works for both of you but remember that you are growing a baby and so much is happening to you already. Don't be afraid to let your partner know that right now he is your main support person and part of his role now is to help ease your worries and concern so include him in the process of finding answers. Don't forget pregnancy doesn't last for ever.

All the best.