Not all OBs are terrible

[BellyBelly]

LOL PacRak I could get started about Telstra, I have very poor mobile service here in the country, I am in a Telstra blackspot which they are investigating

If the title would have been worded differently I may not have posted, for example, I have a great Ob, or I love my Ob. But since it was 'Not all obs are terrible' its implying an issue of an ob bashing mentality. The whole BB is an anti-ob, anti-formula site mentality exists with some, and I am trying to convey the message that we do very much appreciate Obs here, they save lives, but also without alienating those who have had trauma with their births. I now understand that the OP was all about being happy about the choice of Ob, but the wording used wasn't clear that it was only asking for posts in agreeance - but that is foreign to me like I said, I don't post just so people will all have the same belief, support or experience. Could have also been just as easy for a response to say, 'Yes I can see how they could be hurting, must be difficult to have a bad experience. I am so lucky! I'll definitely be telling all my friends' etc etc...

n2l - I see what you mean, but I don't get that impression at all, I see that there are people who are pro-midwife, pro-freebirth, pro-ob. And also the anti- of all of those. I just don't see it as being a massive thing? We all just have our preferences with care and can have bad experiences in all those settings. I know homebirth stories where the mothers weren't happy with the care too... just as anywhere else. Maybe I am not looking in the right places... and maybe thats a good thing. Negative energy isn't a great place to be, groups like that sap the life out of you!

[Mumma T]

Lulu I agree that there are some great ones. The team I am under both ob's, endocrinologists and middies at My hossy have been amazing. They know me by name (yeah ok I am there alot lol) and are always willing to spend as much time as I need with me. While I am pushing for an induction due to pelvic pain that is getting unbearable they are taking every precaution that they can so that is my only intervention if possible. It really is great when you know you have a supportive OB or even medical team cheering in your corner.

[Ambersky]

Obs are just people, some are rubbish, some are awesome and all shades between, I'm glad you have an awesome relationship with yours Lulu. I have a mostly great relation ship with mine too, but i have seen threads elsewhere from women who have had massive issues with her. I find the generalisations hard too.. but i have not walked their journeys nor they mine.

[meow]

I don't understand your post to be honest.

You're saying this OB offered you an induction and you said you're okay as you're not that overdue yet, but your ticker says you haven't even reached your due date? Then the OB went on to state that you would be given interventions regardless next time you're in hospital.

But you think this OB will only give you a c-sect if things go wrong and you need it. Well yeah, that's often the case but it's a question of why did things go wrong?

I'm sorry, but I'm not sure what part of his practice you are trying to convey was good? He sounded overly into unnecessary interventions and in a power position over your body to me.

I AM glad you're happy though. Because a good match between the mother and the care giver is important

[little_O]

I personally am happy with my ob. I've had to have two in this pregnancy and both have let me call the shots and feel like I have control over the experience.

I agree with Lulu about the bad generalization a lot of ob's get and I don't doubt it's because most women can vent on here where they normally could not and it is healthy to have a medium to express yourself. I think the difficulty arises when you feel negatively viewed for wanting and liking your ob. Everyone who has a good ob should be able to voice that without being slammed by others, the same as I would not judge a woman who feels comfortable with not having a professional involved.

Like others have said every doctor is different and some arent worth their qualifications, but for those of us who have found one we trust completely it's a good feeling, no doubt like a proud home birthing mamma who achieved all she wanted.

Personally I think everyone needs to respect and be happy for eachother, in how they choose to birth and support everyone's personal decision. We should be all on the same team

And hey it doesn't hurt to have something positive to say about a group of people occasionally


At the end of the day we all deserve to have a comfortable and happy birth!

[LuluHB]

Just goes to show that our perceptions are often moulded by our beliefs.

Nowhere have I said that my OB has pressured me into anything. He knows ME. He knows MY history. He knows that my last child was delivered in slightly under 20 minutes, that I now live at least 40 minutes drive from the hospital plus whatever time I need to organise my two children here and my Mum to care for them, and am terrified that I will deliver in the car. He knows that my trip to hospital at midnight last week left me completely shattered emotionally. He knows that my fears of losing this baby are sky high. He knows that I don't want an induction if it can be avoided, but that I am smart enough to know the risks and that I am smart enough to understand that sometimes my mental and emotional health is more important than getting the spontaneous labour I would choose in better circumstances, or an ideal world.

This is an OB who saw me during my last pregnancy when I was 41+1 and said "see you in a week" because he saw no need to do anything other than let nature take its course. He is not high intervention. He is high care. He knows that what I want is to go into spontaneous labour, have a lovely slow build up to allow me to get to hospital on time, and then deliver naturally, drug free as I did last time under his care, and that's what he wants too. Fortunately for me, he also wants me to actually stay sane throughout the process and so provides options when I tell him that its all geting too much for me. His comment about breaking my membranes if I end up in hospital again is to reassure me that whatever happens it will be ok (I asked for an induction last week and he agreed to do it for me, but also told me all the reasons why I should hang out longer if I could. One of those apparently mystical OBs who doesn't reach for a scalpel or a drip at a moment's notice. So his remark about not "letting" me go home next time was not said as a threat that hey, you'd better get it right next time or else I'm taking over.

Maybe I should have been far more detailed in my original post and included a whole heap more of my personal history as I've now done. I thought it was enough to say hey, I've got a great OB. Lucky me.

[Floweryfields]

Maybe I should have been far more detailed in my original post and included a whole heap more of my personal history as I've now done. I thought it was enough to say hey, I've got a great OB. Lucky me

It should be enough and you shouldn't feel a need to explain yourself or meet anyone's expectations but your own.

[RhiChiChi]

I see you live in Perth, because I could have sworn we are talking about my OBS in Melbourne!

I am extremely comfortable and happy with mine too. He was my OBS for my DD and I decided after much careful thought into what type of model of care I wanted (I chose private hospital again) that I'd see him again & I am so glad I did. I too don't get rushed in any of my appts, he went through my birth notes and his notes when I saw him for my DD. We talked about the decision I had to make in relation to where I wanted to give birth (which hospital) and how I wanted to give birth (I had an emerg. c-sect with DD). We talked about risk of VBAC (uterine rupture etc..) and repeat c-sect. Told me I had plenty of time to decide or change my mind (I have chosen VBAC). If I change my mind & decide c-sect he said that is my choice, however is cheering me on for a VBAC and as he said if I don't give it go, I won't know. I also talked about my choices in hospital being respected by him & the midwives & that they are all on the same page (in as many circumstances as they can be) and what the % of successful VBAC is at the hosptial I have chosen - all answered honestly & frank.

I wish you all the best for your upcoming birth & it sounds like you are in great hands!

[sahbear]

I have a very similar ob, and will go with him and the same private hospital when we decide to have number 2!
We had a wonderful experience from all caregivers, and made an experience which I was completely freaking out about wonderful and empowering! (I was so scared about it all, I had convinced myself I would never ever be pregnant again, now I cant wait!)

I am so grateful to have found a "good" one!

Good luck with your upcoming birth, looking forward to reading your BA!


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[Cranky Kitten]

Yay for good Obs and more to the point, having a good relationship with your ob where he knows what's on your mind and vice versa.

I'll say I was very glad to have my ob there when it all started to go pear-shaped during DS's birth and am grateful for all his expertise and assistance that kept me from needing a c-sect in the end.

[BlackRose]

My OB is awesome too. Just saying

[onthefly]

LuluHB, you're happy with your OB and the care you're getting. I'm glad to hear it.

I don't think you need to justify this at all. I do think maybe the title of the thread made it seem like you wanted to have a go at the haveagoers, and may have invited some comment.

[AwesomeFoursome]

When i was pregnant with DD3 I had a terrible OB at our local hospital, would end up in tears every time I seen her, it was her way or no way. However when I went in to have DD3 I had a wonderful OB. I ended up having a c-section which was hard after 3 VBs but I know the OB did all he could and waited as long as he could before talking c-section. I had my midwife and student midwife with me plus the 2 midwifes from the hospital who all agreed with the OB so I know he didn't just jump into it lol. He gave me a chose and listened to what I wanted. I'm glad you got a good OB. It will all be over soon and you will be holding your beautiful baby.

[Sagres]

I love my Ob, I'm glad you've got a good one also! I think my ob was one of the ones cheering the loudest after DD2's smooth drug free arrival, she said I should get a crown and a gold star and I should tell EVERYONE how well it went

I also think that tarring all Obs with the same brush is unnecessary and unhelpful. These are very highly trained professionals with years of experience that we can't assume to replace with some reading on the internet. I think we can research and compliment that years of training but not replace it.

But I can definitely see how they get a bad wrap. Of course there are the Obs that are the bad seeds.
I was a private patient and hand picked an Ob who was I was going to work well with and help me get what I wanted, but I can totally see that many women going through a public system mostly see midwives (which is a good thing!) and only see an Ob when things go pear shaped. And no one is going to feel warm a fuzzy about the person who had to take action when things have gone pear shaped. Like another poster has said, they are the ones trained to handle things when they go wrong, so by virtue of that they are going to handle a lot of situations where things haven't gone to plan and there is a lot of ill feeling.

[Charlotte91]

I'm glad your OB is great. sounds like he knows what he's talking about and knows you really well.

I have a good OB this time, after having a nightmare of OBs last time, I know how important a good one is.

Can't wait to see your BA and will be silently stalking.

All the best for the coming days/weeks.
xx

[k4t]

I'm glad you're happy with and trust your OB LuLu. Yay for all the great OBs out there.

I'm sorry some people in this thread have made you feel like you have to defend and justify your trust in your OB. Overall this is a pretty open minded and respectful forum but it's certainly not perfect.