DD's getting AF how did you cope? What to do to prepare?

[paradise lost]

My plans:

I hope that by 9 or 10 DD will have a good grasp o what AF and what it means. She already knows i have AF from time to time (not recently!) and how the baby got in there, and we have touched on how your AF means you can have a baby.

I was nearly 13 when AF came, so i reckon i'll be ok until DD is at least 10, and then i will buy pads and tampons and talk to her about the whole deal. I will ask her if she wants to keep them in her room/bag or if she'd rather they were in the bathroom cabinet (my mum put pads in my underwear drawer when i was just 11 and i felt like an immature peter-pannish freak having to wait 2 years to use them!).

When the time comes i plan to take a day out (keeping her off school possibly) and take her out shopping, to get her nice underwear, some pads or tampons SHE chose, and a meal out with just me to welcome her to womanhood. I plan on making it a really positive and proud moment in her life, while keeping it private (no AF parties for us!) so she has her dignity too.

Bx

[Kitt3n]

When the time comes i plan to take a day out (keeping her off school possibly) and take her out shopping, to get her nice underwear, some pads or tampons SHE chose, and a meal out with just me to welcome her to womanhood. I plan on making it a really positive and proud moment in her life, while keeping it private (no AF parties for us!) so she has her dignity too.

Ditto.

I have made it a point of not hiding anything AF related from DD. SHe understands that one day it will happen to her. (She also understands that sometimes mummy gets uber grumpy and she needs to back off!!).

I use cloth pads so DD thinks they are really funky, all the pretty patterns etc. When I was her age I actually couldn't wait to get AF!

[Lulu]

DD got hers about 12. She had a pretty purse with an assortment of pads and liners in, and when we went shopping she could choose a deodorant.

We had a little celebration and told her Nan and auntie and we welcomed her into womanhood.

[AnyDream]

Emmy i started a couple of years ago by getting a book (aimed at young girls) about the whole shebang. We've also had conversations in the pad/tampon aisle at the supermarket. I started her using deodorant last summer, but TBH it's taken this long for her to understand it's something she needs to do every single time after a shower - I encourage her to use a roll-on BUT I've also let her choose some spray smellies at the supermarket too. I think the penny's finally dropped when she's realised how smelly some of her classmates can be.

Re periods - planning to take her shopping over the school holidays - she can choose her own purse and we'll stock it with pads and a spare pair of undies so she can take it to school with her. They've already talked about it at school and she knows if she gets caught unawares that Mrs H in the office will help & she can ring me up, etc.

Re bras - well this one has already come up - DD is still completely flat chested but I've introduced the idea of wearing the little strappy crop tops under some clothes/tshirts when needed to make sure her nipples aren't showing thru. They have a great range of comfy stretchy ones in funky colours, I'm guessing it'll be a natural progression once she's got enough breast tissue to need one most days.

[Mildez]

Thank you for all your advise ladies. I never thought of having a little celebration (just her and I) to welcome her into the new stage of her life. Obviously its a little way away but I don't want her to be like me and be completely surprised when I learnt what sex and periods were in Yr5. My parents never spoke to me about it so it came as a complete surprise and I was so grossed out about it at the time and scared. I might get her an age appropriate book or two as I have found now she is harder to talk to about it as she is getting a little embarrassed. I've never denied her answers and details when asked or appropriate but now she seems to be too embarrassed to ask any questions. I really don't want her to be surprised when they do sex ed at school like I was or not be prepared for AF and normal body changes when they occur.

[Lulu]

Emmy, think back again to your own experience. What would have made it better for you? Then you can do it with your own daughter.
It should be cause for celebration (imho!), even though we may be grossed out when we are younger feeling part of a bigger picture can help smooth the transition.

xoxoxo

[entreat]

what great ideas! I got mine at a friends house on sleep-over. Luckily my friend already had hers & there were supplies & an understanding mum. But otherwise, it wasn't talked about at home. I actually sent away to one of the brands for a sample pack (they're free & they still do it!), so I had some stocks.

[tan32]

my DD is now 11. I have just picked up on her moods. She tends to be grumpy or teary and i have kept track of this and it is in a pattern of a cycle. She has no other signs of puberty, no pubic hair etc. I have sat down and spoken to her about the change from a girl to a young lady. I spoke to her about washing and using deodrant and we have spoken about periods.
She took this really well and is not worried about it at all, infact she has started to take more care in her apperance..