What is wrong with me??

XH has been so freakin lovely to me and tells me that he is so miserable that our marriage is over and woe is him he is the hard done by one. Then I feel bad and be nice back to him and start questioning my decisions. Did I really do the right thing? I do still love him, so maybe I shouldnt have left him?

Well there was so much chemistry between us and we ended up kissing then one thing led to another. After the act though, he was back to himself and annoying me a lot. So yesterday we had a discussion and he claims that he didnt know our marriage was over, but that he got told by others second hand when he thought things were fine WTF??? I dont understand this! I explained that I gave him an ultimatum and he didnt ever give me an answer, so i just moved on. So i ended up telling him that we could get back together but he would have to let me have my way half the time and i want more kids eventually

Well, he wanted some action today again and was all over me like a rash. Of course I was flattered by the attention anjd ended up doing the wild thing with him. Does he only want me for sex? Is he not going to make an effort ever, he just wants sex? Or am i being super hard on him??

He really seems to think he hasz been so hard done by in all of this, like he still doesnt properly understand my problem with him......

AAAARRRGGGGHHH, I am so embarrassed by being weak and going back to him that I wasnt even going to tell you all

Maybe I am wanting things to be fine cause my life will be so much easier with him and Arch will have his parents together....

And I think to myself, even if i do get back with him I might be so hard on him constantly that we would be miserable anyway...