I'm so confused.
Its only been 2 weeks since I moved into my own place with my kids and left my husband. I had been unhappy for some time (years) and he has been in his own world and not listened or tried or acknowledged the sad state of affairs of our relationship.
In the meantime I have met someone and been seeing this person, although it is never going to go anywhere as he is married and this is an extra marital affair. Please no judgement. We click, I like him. I am not sure if its just because its new and exciting and easy. Its a secret and no one really knows.
My husband is now asking me what he can to do get me back. I don't know how I feel about him & whether I love him like that. But for my children and for the sake of maybe being a family again I feel I should consider attempting to reconcile. I know its only early days but I just don't know what I want and I am so confused. I miss my warm house. I miss being normal and am sick of feeling like I am in a crisis, which I am. Maybe me moving out has shocked him and he will change and we can work on building a life together. But then I think about this guy I have been seeing and how awesomely we connect, and it confuses me. Can you really have EVERYTHING in a relationship? Is it wrong to consider overlooking chemistry and connection in place of security and being with the father of my children and being a family again?
How important is chemistry and do you think with ANY relationship it eventually sort of fades?

I just don't know where my head is at, what I want, or who I am anymore. I love seeing this guy as its an escape from reality, he makes me feel good and forget about my problems and I guess I do the same for him. Even though I know it would never lead to anything and eventually I would be left wanting more, I am not sure I want to give him up.

I am scared to even post this as I know its fraught with so many wrong things.