Oh hun, I didn't realise you were going through so much. I agree that if your XP thinks an hour a week is too much for him, then so be it. It's his loss and you shouldn't blame yourself for his short comings. You have your beautiful girl who will look back one day and thank you for being such a wonderful, strong mummy and an inspiration to her.

In regards to your friends, they really won't know what it's like to have a baby until they are in this situation. I'm the same when it comes to going out, it's just not my thing anymore and I'd spend the whole time thinking of DD instead of enjoying myself. But I do try to make an effort to see them when it's a daytime activity, maybe you can try to catch up with them for a lunch or something instead?

Hugs hun, I'm here if you need to chat