Where is my libido?

[Taurean]

I want my libido back!! Can anyone tell me if I'm in denial or are my excuses for my MIA libido legit?

1. I'm still breastfeeding DD but only twice a day
2. I'm on the mini pill
3. AF has not retuned
4. I'm a mum

So point #4 is a bit of a cop out but what about the others???

TIA!

[ss_storm]

Lol i'd like to know what my excuse is then since numbers 1-3 don't apply to me!!

[Taurean]

Lol i'd like to know what my excuse is then since numbers 1-3 don't apply to me!!

Ha ha ha!

[mrswright]

I know people who have gone off the pill generally say their libido increases after this - one my friends said she'd turned into a p*rn star in her own bedroom I knew one new mum who was told by her doctor to have sex 4 times in 4 days, whether she felt like it or not, and she said that fixed it for her. Much like Doritos, I find that the more I have the more I want Otherwise, sleep and exercise but I'm not sure how likely those are for most mums

[PollyA]

Maybe its on holiday in libido land with mine?

I know people who have gone off the pill generally say their libido increases after this - one my friends said she'd turned into a p*rn star in her own bedroom I knew one new mum who was told by her doctor to have sex 4 times in 4 days, whether she felt like it or not, and she said that fixed it for her. Much like Doritos, I find that the more I have the more I want Otherwise, sleep and exercise but I'm not sure how likely those are for most mums

I think this is defnitely true. When I overcome the tiredness, blah feeling etc I think why don't I do this more often. Maybe try that! Date nights help too!

[Calluna]

When you find where there all hiding can you send mine home too please?

The thought of DTD makes me feel literally sick lately. *tmi* Which is why we've only done it 4 times in the last year!

I think breastfeeding would be legit as it messes with your hormones. Same with the mini pill.
And just thinking about it makes me exhausted.

The fake it til you make it theory probably works well if it's any good. I wouldn't know *more tmi* DF is fairly useless (although has his moments) and I dont have the energy to just lie there and take it, let alone do all the work.

[Taurean]

Heather, PMSL! I kind of know what you mean! DH can be good but he's a bit lazy in the rack sometimes and I generally like my man to take charge in the bedroom....which reading that back, is pretty bloody lazy too really! We are doomed, LOL!

MrsWright - love your analogy! I love Doritos...mmmm... can I convert them to sex?

PollyA - we have tried date nights and they did actually work at first so we decided last night to give it another go, tonight being date night... wish me luck!

I may need to take my post to a more appropriate forum...LOL!

[boobaloo]

when you find your libido, ask it if it's seen mine???
which is funny, i have bloody raunchy dreams, but can't be arsed doing it in real life...

[onthefly]

HAve an ask round for mine too, while you're at it.
My main reason is exhaustion. Years of sleep deprivation will do that apparently.

[Chickoin]

i have bloody raunchy dreams, but can't be arsed doing it in real life...

This is my problem too, the dreams are satisfying enough...

[Nai]

I think they are all on holiday together - I haven't seen mine around for a while either.....

[Miss.September]

Maybe they've all been left behind in the birthing suites?

[~Hestia~]

Yep send mine back too when you find it! I've been off the mini pill for about a month but am still BF, I'm sure that's got something to do with it! That plus I'm on my own for over 14 hours in the day & am tiiiirrrreeed.

[Snacks]

Those are valid reasons IMO

I find that once I start to O again I get mine back, which means any hormonal contraception for me really reduces my sex drive.
Also, the tired factor plays a big part, but I am happy to stay up late if DH helps me with housework. If I don't feel run off my feet, just tired, then I am up for it. Don't know if this is relevant to your situation, but DH is less disappointed now he knows what he needs to do (e.g. THE DISHES!) to get me in the mood.

[Taurean]

OMG, too funny! Glad to hear I'm FAR from alone in this department!! PMSL!

Boobaloo & Chickoin - I'm hearing ya!! I only said to DH last night 'we were having such great sex in my dream this morning' to which he replied 'Was I really good?'. Ah, we'll live our sex life through my dreams, LOL.

Snacks - I'm not even getting turned on by DH doing extra chores around the house! It's definitely nice but it's just not doing it for me. I think my switch needs to be replaced and not just 'switched' back on!

Well I think I might stop taking the mini pill and I'm cutting back DD to one breastfeed a day so *maybe* we'll see a change soon. If not, I'm sure it'll return in full force when I'm ready to start TTC #2. Pity that's not until mid next year!

Thanks for all your feedback girls, I feel a whole lot more normal

[boobaloo]

I think they are all on holiday together - I haven't seen mine around for a while either.....

i think that would be called a Contiki vacation... lol

[Calluna]

I wonder what they're doing together on thier holiday? Something naughty no doubt....

Maybe we should ask someone who's libido hasn't run off to go find ours and bring them back? Although I'd feel terrible for the person if thier libido got distracted and joined in as well.

[meow]

1. I'm still breastfeeding DD but only twice a day
2. I'm on the mini pill
3. AF has not retuned

I'd say these are your reasons (plus being a Mum does count if you are tired, feeling 'over touched' etc). I didn't have any libido until my period came back at 14 months. I was still BFing so that in itself didn't affect my libido, but rather the effect it was having on my hormones by preventing my period from returning (my period returned when I was BFing 4 times a day and I coninued feeding till we conceived again about a year later). Once my period returned, oh my!!!

I didn't go on the mini-pill so I can't say for sure the effect it would have but I did spend most of the 15 years before getting pregnant the first time on hormonal contraception and I can't believe I did now! I thought I had good libido at times, but the effect of your natural hormones is SO much better- I'm never going on the pill again!