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thread: Positive things about bringing a new baby home to your toddler!

  1. #1
    Registered User

    Mar 2007
    6,900

    Positive things about bringing a new baby home to your toddler!

    Why is everyone so negative about pregnancy, birth, babies, everything!! There are heaps of threads about the comments people start getting from the time they're pregnant. Ahhh!!!!!!!

    At the moment what's bothering me is what everyone is saying DD will be like when the baby arrives. I most often get:

    'Oh, DD will be jealous'
    'She'll have her nose out of joint!'
    'She won't use the toilet anymore, she'll go back to nappies to get attention'
    'She'll hate having to share you'
    'She won't be the center of attention for much longer'
    'She's going to play up when the new baby comes'

    And the list goes on...

    Well thanks alot, do you think I don't worry about all these things already I already feel sad about her feeling left out or not having enough time for her.

    So please share with me, what are the good things?? What did you love about those first few weeks when you introduced your new baby to your toddler?

  2. #2
    Registered User
    Add NaeNae on Facebook

    Sep 2007
    South Gippsland
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    subscribing

  3. #3
    Registered User

    Sep 2005
    In the middle of nowhere
    9,362

    My DD was a bit older than yours, but I'll tell you what I remember. For me bringing another baby home to Darcy was a joy. I will never ever forget the day he was born and she arrived and swooped up to the bed to have a look. She was sooo excited.

    When she proudly told the CC girls that she was getting a brother and his name would be Nate (not that we were telling anyone anything or had even discussed it with her but she had picked the name some 15weeks earlier and had been with me - but not listening I thought - when we had discovered he was a boy).
    When asked by people who were visitng and she'd beam and proudly say "that's my brother!"
    When I'd discover a handful of her toys in his bed because she thought he'd need something to play with.
    The way she'd hover over the pram protectively when we were out if someone approached him.

    She didn't regress with her sleep or her toilet training and she had been a pretty crap sleeper. I never heard her say a bad word to him or be mean at all, she is the kindest gentlest little girl - until he started to antagonise her all those months later.
    Without being told she knows to stand up for him at the park. My heart nearly burst the first time.

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Oct 2005
    Cherry Tree Lane
    1,108

    friggin hell some peeps are seriusly uncool. there are so many cool things- didint really affect mr 18 moths at all when miss 2 came home. now he is 3 and she is 19 months and they have a ball. Mr 3 was and is so affectionate to her.

    so- don't push- just let her see the baby when she wants to maybe take her shoppping for little pressie for bubs and help her wrap it etc. and tell her no how much new bubs love her and knows what a good bid sister is gonna be.

    thank the other peeps for being so negative- that'll show em.


    big hugs

  5. #5
    BellyBelly Member
    Add ~MummaBear~ on Facebook

    Sep 2009
    Bunbury WA
    804

    i think the BEST thing about bringing a new baby home is watching the older siblings .. the pure Joy and excitement you see in their little faces.. they are the only ones that have no expectations on how this whole new baby business will go down they just love the baby for.. well being a baby!
    My Ds's were the same age as your DD when we bought home the next bub iykwim and they were so proud to show off their new.."toy" lol
    Sure some bits are hard, kids dont read the rule books but looking at the way they try and interact with bub or they way they simply look at them makes it all worth it!
    Good luck... But i dont think you will need it!!!

  6. #6
    Registered User

    Sep 2008
    Perth
    593

    I agree with mummyof4, the look on their faces when they see their little brother/sister for the first time is amazig!

    When ds1 left to go to the movies with nanna this morning, ds2 was having his nap. As ds1 left I had to promise to give his little brother 200 cuddles and kisses from him the minute he wakes up so he doesn't miss him. It's moments like this that make up for the grumpy times! Focus on these and you'll be just fine!

  7. #7
    Registered User

    Jun 2007
    Where Chaos is fun and plentiful!!!!
    1,883

    Oh Heaven, there are plenty of wonderful things!!!! DS was 23 months old when DD was born- for the first 6-8 weeks to be honest he didnt even care she existed, no jealousy- she was just boring so he didnt bother!! He was great if iw as feeding her and all of that- and his favourite saying was, "time for baby go to sleep?????"

    Then one day she got the hiccups.... Shane sat there and watched her and they smiled, and he kept saying "more" and she kept hiccuping.. and from that day- she was the best thing in the world- and every day he just loves her even more!!!!!

    A few cute and adorable things.......

    DS looking lovingly at DD saying "Awww baby!!"
    When DD is crying if i am not close by he will run to her and say "its ok baby, its ok, mummy be here soon"
    The second he hears her awake he shouts "Baby's awake!!!!!!" and runs to her door!!!! Best baby monitor on earth!!!
    The way DD's face lights up when she see's her big brother!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Hearing them giggle together when DS jumps in the cot with her, when he plays with her, when she see's him!!!!!

  8. #8
    Registered User

    Oct 2006
    Sydney
    4,081

    I think the most wonderful thing is the way the baby responds so enthusiastically toward their older sibling. Older siblings get THE BEST smiles.

  9. #9
    You were RAK'ed in 2015.
    Add beansbeans! on Facebook

    May 2008
    with the fairies and butterflies
    2,535

    I loved the way she fell instantly in love. How she helped with everything and was so happy to be a big sister who had to look out for her little sister.
    I loved watching her get nappies and help get clothes. From the day DD2 was born DD1 just boasted about her to everyone including our animals.

    Honestly I can tell you that DD1 did none of what people are telling you. She loved having someone else around. In the car, DD1 would sit and tell us what DD2 was doing, ie: shes moved her head, shes sleeping, shes cold, shes hot, she needs a toy. It was so cute. And actually she still does it today!!

    The one thing that has stayed with me is that DH and I swear that they have special smiles and language with each other. When DD1 walks into the room, DD2 has this amazing smile that is only for DD1. They have always 'talked' to each other even if we have no idea what they are on about.

    Also DD1, taught DD2 so much already. In DD1'a world she taught her to smile, to laugh, to roll over, to sit up, crawl etc. Thats what we told her and she was so happy to play such an important role in her sister's world.

    She even tells DD2 everything that is going on.

    As you can see I just love the relationship between my two. I love how special they are to each other. I love that the other DD1 cried when DD2 went to the dentist. There are so many more positives compared to negatives. Some people are just kill joys! I would ignore them!

  10. #10
    Registered User

    Jan 2009
    pakenham, victoria
    3,660

    ppl are awesome arent they!!
    FWIW, when we bought DD2 home, DD1 coped the best out of all of us! she took to the big sister roll like a fish to water and it was a very long while before we started noticing signs of jealousy. even then they arent major things.
    she didnt relaps into nappies, she didnt scream and fuss for our attention when we were looking after the baby, but she sureloved to help out!
    it'll be amazing hun, u wait and see

  11. #11
    Registered User

    Jan 2007
    7,197

    Awww hun some people just don't know how to be happy about anything do they. Having the new baby around is so special for everyone! A few things that I have loved seeing...
    The way they just adore each other more and more each day and the way Iz will say "Mummy, James is my best fwend today"...
    The way she just wanted to cover him in hugs and kisses all day long when he was a baby.
    When Iz would breastfeed her dolls because that is all she saw all day every day!
    The way they both fit perfectly under each arm for story time and you can give them both big squishy huggles.
    The way they are growing up together as such wonderful, beautiful friends and every day really is just priceless.

    We never had any jealousy issues here at all, so it all just depends I guess! Good luck hun, it really is just awesome!

  12. #12
    Registered User

    May 2007
    Newcastle NSW
    1,688

    I think the most wonderful thing is the way the baby responds so enthusiastically toward their older sibling. Older siblings get THE BEST smiles.
    Sooooo true! I never thought that would happen so soon either - Evie was only a few weeks old when i noticed her noticing and responding so much to her big brother.
    When dd was born, ds was 22 months old. He knew something was happening and when i asked him at the hospital if he wanted to take her home he said yes. The first few weeks he jsut ignored her pretty much - around 6 weeks he started getting jealous a little bit, lasted all of 2 weeks until he realised that she was here to stay then ever since it has just been wonderful between them. She loves him so much and vice versa!

  13. #13
    Registered User

    Jun 2007
    93

    We went out the week before and got DS to choose a present for his new sister, and there was a present waiting for him from her at the hospital.
    I was really careful to meet DS in the hallway and we all walked in to meet the new baby together. I didn't want him to feel he was replaced... but that he was a part of welcoming a new addition to our family.

    He is the most delightful big brother - sure they quarrel but there are no jealousy issues. I guess preperation (making him wait for things before baby arrives etc) and ensuring his routine doesn't change too much all helped I think.

    HTH?

  14. #14
    Registered User

    Oct 2006
    Melbourne
    1,798

    I got told all of those things too and it really scared me. Gosh some people just like to point out the negatives but the positives outweigh them by a mile.

    DD adored her brother from the first time she met him. My biggest problem was making sure he didn't get smothered to death by her hugs and kisses. She didn't go back to nappies or stop sleeping and in fact I think it made her grow up a little bit as she wanted to be the 'big girl' and not 'the baby' anymore. It really is awesome! And even if your DD is a little jealous then that is completely normal and understandable and won't last long, I bet they will be the best of friends

  15. #15
    Registered User

    Oct 2007
    ★ nor here nor there ★
    4,134

    DD1 actually progressed with the TT'ing and went into knickers all day
    DD1 is absolutely besotted by her little sister and gives her the best kisses and cuddles
    DH and DD1 wrapped a present together for DD1 to give to DD2 when she was born, and gee she was a proud big sister when she gave it to her
    DD1 get genuinely sad when DD2 is upset
    DD1 tells DD2 it will all be ok A.... when she is upset
    DD1 is helpful and loves being involved, opening the nappy bin, picking up her dummy, singing songs to her
    DD1 was very impressed when DD2 gave her a present the day she was born, and special little gifts each time she came in (ie colouring book and crayons)
    Loved the moment when DD1 met DD2, looking at her in the isolette, we opened the door and she put her hand in and held her hand..... awwwwwwwwwwww

  16. #16
    Registered User

    Dec 2006
    Melbourne
    3,737

    As others have said the excitement of newborn cuddles, the proudly showing off their brother at daycare and to family, all bring lots of joy into the house. There is always a lot of laughter. Our girls are 20 months apart and they were doing nudie runs around the house and giggling together. Ds is 18 months younger than dd2, she adores him she loves getting his dummy and makes sure he has his blankie and a toy. She was a bit rough to begin with but she is learning. Ds would only roll to see what his sisters are up to until today.

    There are so many positives. Dd1 has regressed in tt but I was in hospital for a week then Ds was born and we moved house so she has a lot going on. There have been no sleep issues though, and i swapped to cloth nappies as two in nappies full time and one part time got too expensive.

  17. #17
    Registered User

    Jul 2006
    Melbourne
    3,715

    Oh yeah, we got told by everyone that DS1 would be soooo jealous, he wouldn't know what had hit him, he was going to hate it blah blah blah. Some really awful stuff actually. Well, almost 11 months on, we have NEVER had an issue! I'm surprised at how smoothly it went, given the dramas we had with my pg and with DS2 being in hospital for a month after his birth, DS1 really got neglected by his mummy . But he is an awesome, loving big brother, and my boys have a wonderful time playing together. I'm sure they'll belt each other someday, but for now it's all good

    The best thing is seeing the big one cuddle the newborn DS1 really loved being involved with bathing DS2. Even changing his nappy, dressing him etc. He loves to show him toys, or read books all together. Something that makes life easier for you, is that once the little one is old enough (which comes around faster than you think!) they are so happy to play on the floor, if their older sibling is there too! DS2 is so happy to roam around the lounge room without me, because his brother is there. It's awesome! LOL

    We did all the present giving etc too, I think it really helps. Good luck, and enjoy

  18. #18
    Registered User

    Apr 2010
    WA
    457

    I have absolutely LOVED sharingthe experience of meeting our new baby with our daughter. It is so different to when it was just her.
    From day one I thought it was magic. She was gentle, her eyes were wide with wonder. She thought this new baby was the best thing ever.
    And as he's grown she has been his favuorite thing in the world. He just watches her, all the time, and laughs when she bangs him over the head (which makes discipline very difficult)
    We were pretty open minded about the effect it might have on her, bad behaviour, regression etc. but none of those things were true. It took us a bit longer to be ready for things like getting rid of her dummies and night toilet training (we're still not there) because we needed to wait for a time that we were ready to put up with less sleep, more laundry etc, but she's been pretty cruisey.
    Some things are a bit harder to come by...sleep, quiet time, but some things are much more abundant...precious moments, love.
    Good luck
    x

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