oh hun, since when is it about getting her to agree to the minor details? You should outline how many people, starting time, what food SHE is going to provide (with your help of course), the fact that NO alcohol with be allowed and drunken kids that turn up with be sent away or their parents called.

She can fill in what goes on inside those parameters - regardless of how well she has done at school. (I painted a wall last week - doesn't mean there is a brass band coming down the street to celebrate )

Of course she is going to whine about it (that's her job). Too bad, you have to be the boring parentals and set the rules because that's your job.

xoxoo GL!