anila & maddison - i agree maddison. my brother lost his son 5 years ago. he was born at 24 weeks and lived for 2 weeks and the family doesn't talk about it. my brother needed and needs to talk about it so on little izacc's birthday i always call my brother and let him know that i know its izacc's birthday and chat about what he would be like if he was here and we have a cry and a laugh.

anila - maybe you could text your gf once a week and let her know you are thinking of her. take care of yourself and don't beat yourself up. jealousy is a natural feeling in our situations and we mean no harm by it.