Trying to Conceive after Miscarriage/Loss April/May 2009

[boble]

Jen - sorry to hear RB has arrived. I was going to have a makers or JD and coke last night since he had arrived but I had a bit of a headache so decided against it) -tonight though, there will be no stopping me.


Ok... i'll be back later for more persies.. just on the phone with sivf sorting out my testing scedual eek!

[Trillian]

I also just want to reiterate what Flowerchild has just said. It is not a huge ask to turn your tickers off in this area and quite frankly the arrogance and disrespect is astounding.

[sushee]

Apparently, Flowerchild's post has been utilised to attack her, when in effect she is speaking as a representative of many of the members who use this thread, and this forum. That is something we do not tolerate here on BB, that members feel it's okay to attack a moderator for doing her job in protecting the members of this forum.

As individual members, you are not privy to complaints, PMs or discussions that we, as moderators, receive on a regular basis. You are not the person who has to appease a woman with a recent loss who finds pregnancy tickers confronting and painful. You obviously do not have to deal with this pain and therefore you will not have an idea of where Flowerchild is coming from.

This forum is 90% about pregnancy and babies, and there is 90% of the forum for you to view pg tickers. That there are members who find it difficult to see such a ticker in a M/C forum is understandable.

That there are people arguing with the rule to turn pg tickers off in this forum makes me wonder if in fact you understand that being supportive ALSO means not doing something that is likely to hurt someone and cause them pain. Or is support only offered on YOUR terms? Does the fact that there are those who are hurt by it mean nothing to you?

I welcome you to PM me to discuss this further if you have any further input on this topic. We have had this rule in the LTTTC forums for many years without issue, and if I need to explain it again in plainer terms to you as to why we have the rule here now, I'm more than happy to do it in private. ANY further public discussion on this topic will be removed and the poster infracted without further notice for debating a moderator decision.

[coco1411]

I agree with Mods.

I know that when im having a bad day and see someones ticker it sends me into a depressed state that's hard to get out of. I dont think it is too much to ask that those that are having successful pregnancies not to display their pg tickers in a forum where women are grieving.

If you want some hope, (and I do this myself)..go into the PAML thread

Thanks Mods!

Other than that, hello to everyone and all the newbies in here! I have been lurking. We are still having dramas with our real estate re closing the sale of our apartment and the stress is causing me headaches..literal headaches. Instead of closing today we're closing in another month.. basically the tenant went and signed another lease after being told not to and after she was made aware that we were selling the place so the buyers therefore couldnt have it vacant posession...We didnt think anything of the lease when we got it in the mail because that was when we lost our baby. *sigh* I hate real estate..

I am due to get my blood taken to test my progestorone and do full blood work to rule anything out so that's pretty cool. I have started ther POAS with OPK now because I ovulated early last month & dont want to miss it! I think I am meant to have the progestorone tested at 7dpo is that right? I thought it should be earlier, can someone please help me on that one?

Hope everyone is having a better week than us!

[Inanna]

Coco the progesterone test is sometimes called the day 21 test... This is because it should be done for the most acccurate result at 7 dpo. So about 8 days after you get your first positive opk.
Good luck.

Thankyou for the masses of positive feedback and understanding I have received. As Sushee pointed out - my job is to enforce the guidelines of the forum. I think it is also important to remember that this forum is visited by folk that don't post - women and some men who want to glean support from others in a similar position. So just because a very few of you think it's not upsetting a large number do. We have privvy to that information. Our aim is to be a place of support and understanding - where the majority are comfortable.

Now, lets put this to bed and move on with supporting those that need support...

[meh]

Gosh guys what a full-on couple of days it's been in here!

coco ~ Good luck with your testing. It's beyond my knowledge, just sending you some good luck vibes. I hope the RE dramas settle soon. Our settlement date is 8 May and in our case the vendor is being awful. How I wish all our RE transactions were without hassles!

erybery ~ that's magical news about your small girl. I'm so pleased for you!!

Mrzbaby ~ I'm thinking of you, hang in there.

Jen ~ When you posted you were having a drink it was hysterical to read because it came up as 9.50-ish am!! I hope RB isn't too dreadful this time. I'm glad you're compling a list of questions for your Dr's appointment. Knowledge is power!

Sally ~ hoping that maybe you've caught your pearl

boble ~ good luck with your investigations with the Sydney clinic.

I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed here and in RL. I'm just trying to breathe and not drop too many balls at once. DH and I did a relay today - I worked this morning and now he's working this afternoon. Thanks so much for our DS's birthday wishes. Fingers crossed he'll get better soon and life can return a little to normal.

It's so funny?! This month I'm pretty sure we aren't pregnant but I'm still checking for every little symptom. Interestingly....there are hardly any symptoms!! I'm a bit confused. I was starting to think (completely without medical back up, just me trying to make sense of things...) that I must have stacks/enough progesterone because of the strength of my PMS symptoms in the last two cycles. I'm just about ready to stop looking for anything, because I'm just getting confused.

Someone here (and I'm sorry, I can't remember who...) used to talk about a 'zen' approach to things. Well here goes nothing!

My apologies to those I haven't named individually. I think about you all often.
Take care everyone,
M

[milly5]

Hi all,

I posted this over on another thread (I am not sure where actually as I am new to this site).

Anyway ....

4 days ago I had a m/c. We had been TTC for a while, and were so excited when we got the BFP. *sigh*

We were really struggling with TTC, so I had got the OPK sticks. I got the sticks because I didn't feel confident with temping, given that I work shift work, and would not be able to temp at the same time each day.

But I am anxious for us to TTC as soon as possible, and the DR has advised it will be OK as long as I have at least one normal cycle.
I am considering a fertility monitor, as I can't sit back and wait another year to TTC (I am now 37 and have 2 angel babies and no living children).

Does anyone have any experience with fertility monitors, and can recommend a good one (and where to get it from)?

Or even any advice really would be appreciated.

Thanks.

[Cherished]

morning lovlies,

milly5 Welcome I am so sorry for your loss. I temp and use the opk's which I have found to be really accurate (if that helps at all) temping would be pretty hard for you if you work shifts so if the opk's work for you than maybe give the temping a miss? Do you track your CM too? I think I could really do a chart just on CM and use the OPK's also. Re ttc again. We decided to try straight away but didn't geta bfp. I have just had my 1st period and am hoping to get a BFP this time! Good luck with whatever you decide

Lulu, Sparkles,Ferrals, Teme, Missymoohoo & Susie-T I am thinking of you all

Shortcake I hope you are ok honey

sallyk61 what did the acupuncturist say your temps should be? I forgot to mention that I went back on Friday for the 2nd visit since the D&C and she said that there was a huge improvement in my hormones so I am feeling pretty confident that my body is all ready to go for o on (hopefully) Monday.

tutmae thanks for the baby vibes

charm What is preseed... I think I've asked before ages ago on this thread but can't remember if I got answer? Does it boost your chances heaps? How does it work?

Hannah so nice to hear from you hope you are doing well xoxo

Meh, Mel, Angles, Jen, RhiChi, Sunny, Smi, Ervbery, Coco, Boble, Mollycat, megsmum, Greenslw, Mrzbaby, JackJack& Mannie

[charm]

Mrzbaby I really hope that it is just to early to test I am thinking of you and best of luck.
My order of pre seed arrived in time for my O this month so I am hoping that will help with making my ttc wish to happen faster as I am not the most patient person in the world the last 10 weeks seems like a whole year not that I am wishing time away have a good day everyone.

[sallyk61]

Thanks for letting us know how to turn the tickers off! It will be very helpful when the time comes.. hopefully very soon!

Milly - Sorry that your joining us but it is a wondeful, supportive and helpful thread. I have only used OPK's and temping isnt reflecting my bodily activities I dont think but I do remember something being mentioned a while ago so who ever posted about it will be on soon no doubt to help!


meh - hope its gets easier soon and your little man starts to feel alot better!

Flowerchild - is the day 21 test a poas test?

coco - hope you get some answers soon!! xxoo

jen- sorry RB is here but hope you have a lovely few drinks to relax!!!

Afm - went to acupunture, he said my temps are all wrong and ALL to high????
Anyway I guess it doesnt matter cause the opk's told me what I needed...
I think.....

xxoo

[jen805]

Will be back later for persies.... but I wanted to tell the mods thanks.... you know what for! I just wanted you to know that it's appreciated by more than just me! Honestly, from the bottom of my heart, thank you!



Big for everyone! Will be back later, I promise!

[Angels 1 Angel 2]

I know that when im having a bad day and see someones ticker it sends me into a depressed state that's hard to get out of. I dont think it is too much to ask that those that are having successful pregnancies not gloat about it in a forum where women are grieving.

Goodness Coco..... 'Gloating'..... I think thats a bit harsh. I would personally put it as scared.... not gloating. I have known some of these women personally for close to 2 years.... they stay in this thread becasue they are not comfortable leaving because they are to scared to move on... scared that they will have another miscarriage and unfortunately many of them have. They know the PAML thread is there but they have leant on the support of the ladies in here and at a time when they are a little wobbly at the knees it means a lot for them to still have that support. I dont mean to be picky because I dont know you well enough to know if anything was meant by it or that it was maybe just a wrong choice of words... but I just didnt want those ladies thinking that we all feel that way towards them.

We are all on this journey together and maybe what this last week has taught us is to be a bit mindful of what we do and say to others because sometimes our words can hurt more than we intend them to.


Now if we can put this all behind us and get back to what we do best.....