Trying to Conceive after Miscarriage/Loss - September 2009

[Jahzara]

Coco - how exciting - congrats on finding your brother xo

Hannah - i am so sorry you are going through this - i really hope there is a positive outcome rest up and be kind to yourself xo

Murraycod - goodluck with the IUI - hope this is it ! xo

Hello to Everyone else - hope you are all well !

xoxo

[eliselouise]

Evening all, hope everyones monday was ok.
Hannah im keeping everything crossed for you honey, hopefully everything turns out ok for you
Coco thats very exciting news about your brother, good old facebook - gotta love it Hopefully those flu symptons do mean that you are UTD, keeping my fingers crossed that this is your month!
Murraycod goodluck with the IUI, the injections sound very painful but hopefully it is well worth it in the end.
Twinsister that is good news that you are coping well with people announcing there pregnancys, it can be a very difficult time but im glad you are able to cope better with it now and hopefully youll be able to announce your in not too long as well.
Bonelige im glad you and dh sorted that stuff out, sometimes they must think we are mind readers and they dont need to tell us. I didnt receive any councelling after my loss but sometimes think it may have helped. I dont think people would judge you or think you werent coping if you did go, everyone heals differently and it may help you alot. I think probably the reason i didnt is because i wouldnt know where to go to but seens you have a friend who runs the group i would definately give it a go.
Hello to everyone else and i hope you are all doing ok
AFM im pretty sure that im ovulating today, havent used an OPK coz last cycle i just got let down when they didnt give me a certain positive, but i had some definate noticeable cm this morning so going to try and do the deed tonight and hoping that DB is not too tired
Bye for now

[starangelk]

Hi all - sorry I have been MIA for a while, just lurking in this thread and not posting. I can't tell you why, you ladies are the best, I think it's just part of my way of dealing with everything - like I want to hear how you are all going and it helps to know I am not the only one but by posting it means everything has actually happened. I think I am still in a bit of denial. Sorry if that didn't make sense.

Anyways, I am back now and definately time for some personals

Coco - OMG! That is just amazing, almost unbelievable! Of course I absolutely believe you but wow, it's like something you read in a magazine. I am oh so happy for you, what a wonderful gift

EliseLouise - I also struggled to get a proper positive result on the OPK's I was using, I was using first response. The 2 lines are supposed to match but they never did my entire cycle. So this time I got some from lullaby conceptions and I get 2 equal dark lines. So maybe it's the brand? Happy BDing!!

Chickybabe - how are you doing? I hope you are well.

HannahS86 - I am so sorry to hear your news. I hope the doctors were able to give you some information to help you understand why this has happened. Thinking of you xx

Twinsister - how many DPO are you? I am 6 DPO and this is driving me craaaazy.

HI also to Sammy, Madison, Snugglybean, Bonelige, Murraycod, Zstar and everyone else who I have missed.

AFM - I am just waiting this 2ww out. I have been doing okay, but still a few impromptu crying fits over the m/c that I don't feel coming and I can't explain. I just feel like I have this hollow feeling inside my chest, like something is missing. *sigh*

[Twin Sister]

Hannah - You poor thing, I'm so sorry you are having such a stressful time. I am sending you good thoughs and really hoping the bleed stops and that baby is ok.

murraycod - it rained most of the time but yep we survived and I'm pleased we managed to get in one BD (DS was sleeping in the car lol). Sorry your hubby upset you with his drinking binge but glad to hear his sperm did not seem to be affected. I too am now following your IUI with great interest.

Coco - that is very exciting news about your brother! Congratualtions! I am adopted myslef and I just found my birth family a year ago. I found out I have siblings I never knew about as well. It still feels really strange but it is definitely a great experience. I also hope your lack of cramping is a good sign.

eliselouise - thanks I hope you get to announce a BFP soon too

starangelk - I'm pretty close to you I think...I'm not 100% sure on my exact ovulation date but I'm around 7 or 8 DPO. It's driving me crayz too. I don't think my chances are that great this month but I'm still hoping and I'm dying to know. As an aside your username always makes me smile as I keep mistakenly reading it as "Strange Elk"

AFM I keep having people asking me when I'm having another baby. I wish people would just mind their own business. Serioulsy 6 people have asked me in the last week and I'm getting rather annoyed. Even though I would love to tell them to mind their own beeswax as they have no idea what a person's situation is like and they should not be asking such personal questions, I have decided just to be honest with them all and then let them feel reallly bad and awkward. I have told them all "Well we've been trying for 9 months now and we were pregnant in July but we lost the baby so I guess I have to wait and see when we're lucky enough to have another". That shuts them up pretty darned quick.

[HannahS86]

Thank you all for the wonderful words of encouragement. It is so good to know you are all here and know what I'm going through.

I spent about an hour on hold this morning with my obgyn. All I was trying to do was find out if I could schedule an appointment, but nobody ever answered the phone! Finally, my mother and I decided to just go to the office and see what they could do. The receptionist said, "Sorry, there's nothing open today. You're going to have to go to the ER." We ended up going to another obgyn that was nearby and thankfully they were able to see us within 30 minutes. And I am SO thankful that we went there because I am definitely ONLY going there from now on. At this point, I am waiting for the ob to call with the results from my blood test. She was going to order an ultrasound, but after realizing how early I am in this pregnancy, she didn't think we would be able to see much anyway and she didn't want to stress me out even more.

The bleeding was a moderate flow when it started. It was like that for a few hours. But I put a pad on overnight and there was only a bit of spotting when I woke up. I am still bleeding a bit now but it has turned brown. I have been having some cramping on and off, but nothing intense like with my last two m/c. So I have no idea at this point what's going on. Maybe it was bleeding that was unrelated to the pregnancy? Or maybe it was so early that there wasn't much that needed to pass and that's why it stopped so quickly? I know that the outlook right now isn't great. A part of me is trying to hold on to hope, but the other part is telling me to be realistic about what is probably happening. I am just praying that we get the results tonight so we can at least know. Please keep my baby in your prayers, ladies. I am so scared.

[Tanya]

Oh Hannah (((hugs))) I am sorry you are going through this right now
Please stick little bubba, mummy loves you!!

[coco1411]

((((hugs)))) Im so sorry Hannah. Hope that it is a sticky baby holding on for you!! We're here to catch you if you fall hon xx

[Inanna]

Oh Hannah I am holding your hand too...

[luna moth]

Can't hold your hand - fingers crossed too tight! Thinking of you, with all my best vibes coming your way xxx.

[murraycod]

Hannah
We are all thinking of you and your babe, let us know when you get the rsults back.
Holding my breath untill then XX

Maddison, Joshs'smum, Kyra, Chickybabe, Zstar and TinaR how are you all going? I'm obsessed with pregnant women at the moment....have been for a while actually.......gives me hope seeing you girls get your BFP's and hearing how you are.

Twinsis good on you x I do that now too!! Good to know I'm not the only one to get a little smile at watching stickynoses squirm!!

Loopylouie have you started the clomid yet? How are you?

Bookworm hope this month goes nice and quick, hows the weightloss going? I need to do the same but a keep saying tomorrow tomorrow. Summer will be here before we know it, but I want to be fat......with a babybelly though.

Ferrals goodluck with the IVF next month, DH and I will be doing IUI untill November, and If things haven't worked out for us then, I will be giving my body and mind a rest in December and start IVF in January. I pray we don't have to get to that but I guess it is nice to have a plan. Best wishes for you X

Eliselouise
Starangel
Tanya
Coco
Flowerchild
Snugglybean
SammyP
Bonelige
Hearts
Sparkles
Milly5
And to anyone I missed, hello and babydust to all XXX

[ferrals5]

Murraycod-Thank's for the thought i hope you get your BFP and don't have to do ivf but if you do come catch up with me in the ivf thread i'm still waiting for my ph call but the scientist told me last wed my test should be ready in 2-3 week's if all go's to plan so my next cycle is in 26 day's they are cutting it close i will die if they are not ready.

[bonelige]

I am absolutely terrified that I'm never going to have a child. After the first, I was sure it was just one of those things. Just bad luck. After number two, I was a little bit scared, but still hopeful that things would happen next time. But three???? My odds aren't looking good. I've been tested for clotting disorders and some hormone imbalances. I'm going to get every single test done that I possibly can. I am so alone.

thinking of you heaps. it must be a horrible, scary and frustratign situation. big hugs for you

Bonelige So happy to hear you and DH have made up!
The day after my last post, my DH came home from a fishing trip with the boys completely paroletic drunk. He passed out in the shower and he didn't even flinch when I turned the hot tap off! I was so angry with him. I had to drive all the way in to the hospital to get one of the girls to give me my inj for the evening (dh usually does it) and I slept on the couch because the bedroom stank like grose alcohol breath and drunken farts........I giggle now but at the time I couldv'e cried and cried. Not even 40hrs to go for our IUI and he gets his spermies ****ed out of their brains! All that work all month...all of those needles......for what???? Hungover tired sperm.

Well today at 12pm we had the IUI done. His sperm motality was 95%, I dunno how
The nurse said it was a small sperm sample but a potent one.....not gunna tell DH that though
So now I'm resting on the couch, starting to get a bit crampy but that is the norm.
Told to rest easy for 2 days, and than begin Pregnyl inj Friday.............more needles. I'd take a pic of my tummy to show you all how bruised and battered it is but I'm embarrased to!!!!! 14 inj I have had so far this month.
I just hope this is all worth it.

Hello to everybody I hope everyone had a nice weekend. Good luck for everyone in the TWW, is anyone testing soon???

good luck. 14 jabs sound spretty painful. glad his spermies weren't too drunk

Bonelige im glad you and dh sorted that stuff out, sometimes they must think we are mind readers and they dont need to tell us. I didnt receive any councelling after my loss but sometimes think it may have helped. I dont think people would judge you or think you werent coping if you did go, everyone heals differently and it may help you alot. I think probably the reason i didnt is because i wouldnt know where to go to but seens you have a friend who runs the group i would definately give it a go.
Hello to everyone else and i hope you are all doing ok
AFM im pretty sure that im ovulating today, havent used an OPK coz last cycle i just got let down when they didnt give me a certain positive, but i had some definate noticeable cm this morning so going to try and do the deed tonight and hoping that DB is not too tired
Bye for now

hope the deed gets done

Hannah - You poor thing, I'm so sorry you are having such a stressful time. I am sending you good thoughs and really hoping the bleed stops and that baby is ok.

murraycod - it rained most of the time but yep we survived and I'm pleased we managed to get in one BD (DS was sleeping in the car lol). Sorry your hubby upset you with his drinking binge but glad to hear his sperm did not seem to be affected. I too am now following your IUI with great interest.

Coco - that is very exciting news about your brother! Congratualtions! I am adopted myslef and I just found my birth family a year ago. I found out I have siblings I never knew about as well. It still feels really strange but it is definitely a great experience. I also hope your lack of cramping is a good sign.

eliselouise - thanks I hope you get to announce a BFP soon too

starangelk - I'm pretty close to you I think...I'm not 100% sure on my exact ovulation date but I'm around 7 or 8 DPO. It's driving me crayz too. I don't think my chances are that great this month but I'm still hoping and I'm dying to know. As an aside your username always makes me smile as I keep mistakenly reading it as "Strange Elk"

AFM I keep having people asking me when I'm having another baby. I wish people would just mind their own business. Serioulsy 6 people have asked me in the last week and I'm getting rather annoyed. Even though I would love to tell them to mind their own beeswax as they have no idea what a person's situation is like and they should not be asking such personal questions, I have decided just to be honest with them all and then let them feel reallly bad and awkward. I have told them all "Well we've been trying for 9 months now and we were pregnant in July but we lost the baby so I guess I have to wait and see when we're lucky enough to have another". That shuts them up pretty darned quick.

i know how you feel. A friends texted and asked if i've re knocked myself up again. i didn't reply and a few hours later she realised waht she said was wrong and apologised for being out of line.
good for you being honest. why hide your feelings. good on you

[Twin Sister]

Hannah - I'm glad to hear the bleeding has slowed to spotting and that the new Dr. you saw was so much nicer to you. If it makes you feel better I had three bleeds during my first pregnancy and went on to deliver a healthy baby boy. Each bleed was really scary as they all started off moderately heavy and bright red, but they quickly slowed to brown spotting. With my m/c it was the opposite, it started out as spotting and kept getting heavier and brighter red as the hours and days went by. Still sending baby sticky vibes

bonelige - Sorry to hear about your friend's tactless comment. At least she realized her question was insensitive and apologized. I hope you don't get any other remarks like that.

murraycod - it does give me great satisfaction to watch the faces of the "stickynoses" (ha ha I like that word) drop and pale. Hopefully they'll think twice next time they go snooping into someone elses private matters.

Yesterday I had a really good day. In the morning I hung out with one pregnant friend, and in the evening with another one. I didn't have any moments of jealously (well maybe just an occasional twinge) and I wasn't tempted to cry. I even asked them both a a few questions about their pregnancies. It was a bit difficult but I was really proud of myself for staying so strong.

I have three more days before I can test and my body is teasing me. I am having some serious stomach issues (which I had with my prior pregnancies) and VERY sore boobs. I sometimes get some stomach issues with AF and I used to get sore BBs just before AF before I has DS so it is likely just wishful thinking but now the next three days are going to drag by soooooo slowly.

[HannahS86]

Well, it's official. Sweet baby number 3 has gone to heaven. My levels went from 548 last Thursday to 210 yesterday. We were referred to a specialist and are praying that we can find a solution to this. I can't believe I've been through this three times now. The only way I got through it the first two times was by convincing myself that there wasn't anything seriously wrong with me and it was just really bad luck that it happened twice in a row. There's no way I can keep convincing myself of that now. I am beyond terrified that I won't ever be able to have children. If I let myself even think of that possibility, I will literally die. Being a mother is the only thing I've ever wanted to do in my entire life. I just wanted to thank you all for your incredibly kind words. You ladies are absolutely wonderful. I am keeping you all in my prayers.

[maddison]

Hannah i am so sorry you are going through this again. I hope you are surrounded by people who love you and will support you through this hard time. My thoughts go to you and your partner.

[murraycod]

Hannah I'm so so sorry you are going through this again.
I hope that you are being kind to yourself, know that we are thinking of you and are all here whenever you need us x
RIP little angel.
Take as much time as you need my darling XX

[starangelk]

Hannah I am so sorry to hear about your loss. Hugs to you and all my thoughts are with you.

[coco1411]

Poor girl!! we're here for you for as long as you need us. Im so sorry.