smilanatu...OMG hun... its taken a while for me to post after that... I would have kept the moderators busy editing my post.
I m trying so hard to not think ugly things because I want to assume that she had no calus in what she said and she really does think she is trying to help you. I will say one thing... she does not wear the shoes we wear.
I am wearing a pair of shoes.
They are ugly shoes.
Uncomfortable shoes.
I hate my shoes.
Each day I wear them, and each day I wish I had another pair.
Some days my shoes hurt so bad that I do not think I can take another step.
Yet, I continue to wear them.
I get funny looks wearing these shoes.
I can tell in others eyes that they are glad they are my shoes and not theirs.
They never talk about my shoes.
To learn how awful my shoes are might make them uncomfortable.
To truly understand these shoes you must walk in them.
But, once you put them on, you can never take them off.
I now realize that I am not the only one who wears these shoes.
There are many pairs in this world.
Some woman are like me and ache daily as they try and walk in them.
Some have learned how to walk in them so they don?t hurt quite as much.
Some have worn the shoes so long that days will go by before they think about how much they hurt.
No woman deserves to wear these shoes.
Yet, because of these shoes I am a stronger woman.
These shoes have given me the strength to face anything.
They have made me who I am.
I will forever walk in the shoes of a woman who has lost a child.
and the other one
Just Say I'm Sorry!
You don't know how I feel
Please don't tell me that you do
There is just one way to know - have you lost a child too?
"You'll have another child!" - must I hear this each day?
Can I get another Father , too, if mine should pass away?
Don't say it was 'gods will'
That s not the god I know.
Would god on purpose break my heart,
Then watch as my tears flow?
"aren't you better yet"?
Is that what I heard you say?
NO! A part of my heat aches -
I ll always feel some pain.
You think that silence is kind,
But it hurts me even more.
I want to talk about my child
Who has gone through death?s door.
Don't say these things to me,
Although you do mean well.
They don't take the pain away;
I must go through this hell.
I will get better slow but sure -
And it helps to have you near.
But a simple "I m sorry you lost your child"
Is all I need to hear.
I would suggest reply to her by saying, I would suggest you research a bit before commenting on something you dont know, give her my web site if you want... and end the email with... I hope you never understand because to truely understand you would have had to have lost a child yourself
Last edited by Baby Angels; July 10th, 2008 at 02:36 AM.
you know what, once again... I just dont understand some people.
I know there are people who have had a miscarriage who think its nothing, including a large portion of the medical profession who "write it off" before 20 weeks...... but I just dont understand them. That was and is your baby, your child, your son or daughter and they will always be a part of your life.
My little angels sit by me every day, I have an urn with them. I have a bracelet with 2 hearts engraved with my sons initials and booties with my angels initials... no it s not morbid, its a mother remembering her children who died.
Ohhh goodness.... I m on my high horse again.... I m sorry.... Smilanatu... WE are here for you and WE understand.... If you were here I would just hold my arms out to you and you can cry and your heart out and I would just hold you.
Angel B--That second poem is great (well, the first one is, too, but I've read it many times before) don't think I've ever read the second one! Did you write them yourself?
jen.... No, I didnt write them, When I lost my angels I spent so much time trying to find answers and searched the internet for many many many hours for days and weeks. I ended up putting what I found into a web site..... my web site below.... so that it might help someone who is going through what we have been through.
I did however write this one
Cameron Azrael & Krystal Sariel
We'll never get to hold you,
Or look upon your face.
We'll never get to show you,
Our love through our embrace.
We'll never have the feeling,
Of you calling out to us.
We'll never know the feeling,
Of you looking up to us.
Why you were taken away from us ,
We'll never really know.
We look around for a sign,
As to why you weren't to grow.
There is nothing we can do right now
Our minds are an absolute mess.
There is confusion, sadness, sorry,
And anger I must confess.
Our tears can not bring you back,
Back into our world.
You are gone from us on this plain
We'll meet again I know.
So until that time I ll say to you,
And you must listen to your mummy.
Watch out for us when we come one day,
Your mummy and your daddy
Last edited by Baby Angels; July 10th, 2008 at 02:37 AM.
DH just looked at me funny... its nearly 3am here and the house is quiet...and all of a sudden I just laugh... "well, let's just say I suck"
For me with peoms if I try to push it it wont happen. Every poem I have written comes directly from the heart and most of them will never be read by anyone else. There are some that I will read over and think.... Ohhh that could have read differently but I leave it and never alter them. They all are as they are... it was what was in my heart at the time that I wrote it.
So now that you have given me a laugh for this evening.... I m going off to bed.... wellllll not quite off to sleep.....
But before I go smilanatu.... WE are here for you hun..... and WE understand
Angel, I was just being completely honest, but glad to have given you a good laugh! Hey, I was wondering what DH was up to while you're up so late on the computer! I was hoping I wasn't keeping you from your efforts. Wow, 3 a.m., you two are night owls! Remember, no ugly nighties tonight! Will promise not to disturb your baby making efforts!! Go catch that egg!
I'm boo hooing at my desk...I feel like my heart could burst because jen and Angel Babies...you ladies are the BEST!!! It's amazing how the people closest to you can break your heart and people you've never even met can pick up the pieces and put them all back together...I appreciate you bith more than you know! Thank you!
Smilanatu - you sure don't need enemies do you. You'd think that someone who has had a m/c would understand where you come from. I guess not everyone is as thoughtful and sensitive as us (that's what makes us great people). I believe everyone has the right to grieve in their own way, but they shouldn't push that way onto others. Maybe this is her way of coping with her m/c. I would send her Angel's website and make sure her poems are in her face. Maybe it will give her a reality check.
AFM - waiting, waiting, I've ran out of tests so have to wait to POAS. (just adding to the suspense). Temps look good, but don't know, have no symptoms, so not holding my breath.
Krystie - LOL about DH. Better be careful, he may be right he'll get all the symptoms, watch out everyone. You know how men are if they get sick. Love your new name. Do you often work long shifts, you may need to cut that out if DH is UTD.
smilanatu- what sort of friend does that? i still can't believe it and it makes me so angry, can only imagine how hurt you are. i have been dealing with some insensitve people lately too, i had a big cry and got it all out but now i have had to put up my little armour and shut those people out. i have to do it to protect myself. i know if i need to talk i have dh or i have you ladies, and that's all i need. anyone who is going to make me feel bad is not worth the time and effort. i'm not saying you should shut your best friend out completely but maybe don't look to her for your much needed support at this time. remember we are always here for you and we always understand the pain
smilinatu: oh sweetheart, that made me soo angryi cant believe a fiend would be soo insensitive, especially given that she should know better having experienced it herself. So so sorry...
jen: really, your first attempt? that was beautiful! it was really sweet that we here were your inspiration...you brought tears to my eyes, thank you
molly: your chart is looking good hon
krystie: oooh, your chart is looking fab too! good luck with testing today...im sooooo hoping for you to get a BFP!
Im going to test on Saturday i think....i just had a look at last months chart, my temp took a big dive on day 28...today is day 28 and its still up!!! woo hoo!!! no other symptoms yet though...however last time i felt pg i didnt get symptoms till a week after AF was due...
so, girls, im asking all of you to say a big prayer for me today...Please????
Smilantu - I am sure your friend mean't well (much like slapping someone to check they are not unconscious - hmmmmmmmm). But you don't need a slap. You need love and understanding. I cannot believe the lack of empathy. But you have it here, hon'
Mollycat - Wow your chart looks great this month. Day 5dpo looks so much like an implantation dip. Coverlines can be out by one day either side. That would give you a dip at 6dpo which is right on track. WOW!
KrystieLove - I continue to watch you chart with great enthusiasm. I don't want to jinx you, but if DH is getting sympathy symptoms I reckon your next, sista!
Jen - your poem rocked! I think it should be posted on the M&L homepage!
Angelbabies - you are the sweetest thing. I balled again reading those beautiful words. Your bracelets are a beautiful idea. Not advertising your story to the world - simply a loving reminder for a woman who has had to wear "those shoes".
AFM - I am doing better this morning. Actually slept last night. Have been stressing because DH is going abroad for work for a week, in a week, and I am afraid to be without him during these early risky weeks. I just can't face the possibility of going into hospital again for the third time in a year without him at my side. This morning we came to a compromise (he will take off some time before and after). At least this will keep me calmer until he goes. Am I selfish?
to everyone here for the continued support over the past few days. Looking forward to seeing some BFP's very soon!
Last edited by Where there's hope; July 10th, 2008 at 09:38 AM.
KL - Tommorrow you'll be 11 DPO. I don't think that's too early. I was planning to POAS at 10DPO.
Smilanatu - Maybe it's implantation spotting? Let's hope so. Don't worry about the "all about me thing" that's what we're here for
Just read the email from your BF. Are you sure she's your BF? She needs a kick in the a$$. Send her over to see me. That makes me so mad!! I am so sorry you had to read that. We love you and understand. You think and feel what you like and just tell her to pi$$ off until she is prepared to put herself in your shoes. What's her phone number?! I am so mad I am nearly crying for you...
Angel - those poems are beautiful. They say it all don't they.
Sorry, I would love to say that yours was beautiful too, but couldn't bring myself to read it. Am feeling quite emotional this morning ... not regarding my MC ... not sure why. So sorry I didn't read it. Perhaps another time.
Jen - Sorry - had to skip yours too.
Jen - Ha! I am so number 34 & 36 of your "you know you're addicted when...". KIDS! Go and run around, mum needs the computer!!!
I normally do copy my posts. And I thought about it several times through that post. I said to myself, "no need to copy anymore, you know how to work this thing now" ... NOT!
Now for a bit of .... Ctrl A, Ctrl C
Chart's lookin good, Jen. Keep in the competition. I think you're a little ahead of me, since we haven't BDed for over a week now!!
Molly - I can't beleive you've ran out of tests. You poor thing.
Tina - I'm sooo excited for you!! Hope you get a BFP on Saturday.
AFM - What's going on with my chart? Why is it dropping?? Although when I compare it to last month's when I actually was UTD, it hasn't dropped to near the cover line, so I guess that's good, yeah?? Mind you, AF wouldn't be here to drop it yet anyway I suppose.
I vote we change AF to UF, Uncle Frank. After all, isn't it men that give us the *****s??
Once again, my time at the computer this morning has caused my fingers to become as cold as the red and white pole outside Santa's house.
Little tired today. Is that good? Is that good????
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How hard that must've been for you to write... I wish I could find the words to create my own- my skills as a poet, well, let's just say I suck!
Angel, I was just being completely honest, but glad to have given you a good laugh! Hey, I was wondering what DH was up to while you're up so late on the computer! I was hoping I wasn't keeping you from your
i cant believe a fiend would be soo insensitive, especially given that she should know better having experienced it herself. So so sorry...
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