maybe baby--I wish I had the magic words that would take away all your pain! Just know that you didn't do anything wrong--I think that's the hardest, yet the most important thing for all of us to comprehend. You'll find yourself consumed will all kinds of emotions right now--sadness, anger, confusion--it's all completely normal and is part of the healing process. Allow yourself to cry and vent, and don't expect too much out of yourself right now. Take the time you need to grieve. I promise there is a light at the end of the tunnel--we'll all help you get there. You're in my thoughts and prayers!