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thread: TTC after Miscarriage or Loss ~ August 07 #2

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  1. #1
    Registered User
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    Aug 2007
    adelaide
    1,989

    Treelo, i know that feeling all too well!
    at least he bought you flowers and admitted he did something wrong......i never get flowers anymore (boo hoo poor me)
    xxx

  2. #2
    Registered User

    Jun 2007
    vic
    249

    Hi Starrysky and Treelo!
    Treelo-had to chuckle to myself (no offence) because you sound just like me! My DP was so insensitive last night (without meaning to be) that I got so bloody angry and upset at him, I couldnt look him in the eye until I'd had a little cry . Then of course I felt rather pathetic, and a bit guilty as well for making him feel bad when he genuinely had no clue. I'd hate to be living with me at the moment, so bloody up and down and hormonal etc. my name should be Sybill there are that many crazies inside me at the moment.

  3. #3
    Registered User

    Jul 2007
    122

    Good evening Treelo, Beaksie and StarrySky - Sounds like your DHs are the same as mine! Some men are all out of the same mould, i reckon. I have experienced that in the past too. For some reason some men are not very cooperative at the most important times... mine included! Glad you got flowers thoug, Treelo... romance is a good thing! (I never get flowers either, StarrySky, so don't worry... i just get told that they're going to die anyway so what a waste of money!!??)

    Hi to everyone else - is anyone else on tonight?

    StarrySky - blood tests are the best way to know if a m/c is on it's way. The hCG numbers are meant to double or something eveyr couple of days. With this m/c, i had two blood tests as soon as i found out i eas pregnant. The second test was done about 5 days after the first, and my hCG was around the same. Doc told me that meant i had already m/c'd and my body had to then release it. Next time round i am going to keep on having the blood test to make sure the hCG lvel is rising... i woud go nuts waiting till the magic 12 weeks to see if eveything was still ok!!! So blood test are the way to go and then a scan from about 7 weeks would tell you if there was a heartbeat. Hope that helps.

    Las - great news about your ovulating! Hope that your cycle sorts out so you guys can begin the journey!Quick question - how much baby aspirin did your friends take? What is the dose and can you do buy without a script?

    Beaksie - i know how you feel hun. It seems like everyone around me falls preg so easily, and they have no idea what an emotional rollercoaster it is for us. When i m/c'd this second time, i just remember thinking "far out, not again... it's not fair". So, being positive is something i could do with some help with, too. But i think as Sharon said, this chat room is awesome at helping you to feel positive when it seems like the emotional rollercoaster starts roaring again.

    Nighty night.... babydust to us all, please!

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Aug 2007
    sydney
    18

    Sharon- CONGRATULATIONS!!!! You go girl!

    LizJessie- Yes, I am getting excited about the wedding now. I can't believe it, not even 2 weeks to go now. YAY for AF!!! You can start BDing really soon!

    Starrysky- I also found out I'd miscarried at the "downsyndrome" scan (mine was at 12 weeks) and apparently the baby had stopped growing at 8.You don't need to minimise your miscarriage because you've only had 1.. As far as I'm concerned, 1 is enough. My GP was fabulous, but the first time I miscarried naturally and the second time, I went to see my Ob. I waited for the miscarriage to start naturally and started bleeding last Tuesday and am still bleeding now. Can't wait for it to stop so we can start TTC again. It shouldn't matter that you aren't with a health fund, your GP should want to help as much as possible. For my second pregnancy, she booked me in for an US straight away because of my previous M/C. Even with private health, the Ob can be so expensive, but I'm seeing one for my own peace of mind. It's an individual choice, but if you want to take on private cover, you need to find out what the waiting period is for pregnany as they may not cover it for the first year.

    Beaksie-
    Staying positive is very hard, but I agree with the other girls, that it helps to be in here where you can talk about everything and 'cleanse' so it's not all kept inside. It's also hard when people tell you to "relax and stay positive" because, once you've had a m/c, it's very hard not to be anxious. All we can do is try.

    Littlescottishboy- :hugs: to your Mum.

    Hello to everyone else, I hope your week is going well. BFP's all round!!!

    Love Ems

  5. #5
    curl Guest

    Just wanted to say good morning to everyone...but nobody is here!

    My DH and I bd'd last night for the first time since m/c. I had been putting things off because of spotting and he was away for two weeks too. Afterwards I got really sad again because the last thing to be down that area was our baby and then of course the machine to do the d&c. I let him know that I was sad again and why and he just held me tightly. I'm sure that it is only because we were 'breaking the seal' so hopefully subsequent bedroom trysts won't end the same way. Did anyone else feel the same way?

    Curl

  6. #6
    Registered User
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    Aug 2007
    adelaide
    1,989

    hello curl! hope its a good morning for you, i know how you feel about "breaking the seal" as you so aptly called it, i cried the first time, but i cry almost every night/day, still highly emotional, mentally and physically i am fine, but as soon as i see a baby...........
    i got a little talking too from dp as i was scared and just didnt want to do it, i guess its like falling off the proverbial horse, you just have to get back on!
    littlescottish boy yes i have heard that one too! thanx for the info on the b/ts i think thats def the way to go, i will be terrified to go for a u/s again!
    does anyone have any idea if the gps are happy to do the b/ts? i think i will find a new one, i guess they would prob refer me to a obgyn? i feel so clueless.....

  7. #7
    Registered User

    Jun 2007
    the love boat
    873

    Morning Curl - I couldnt get in to BB this morning...glad its all working now.

    Starrysky - managed to get over my anger last night. And BDed as well.

    I hope everyone has a great day.

    hugs
    treelo

  8. #8
    Registered User

    Jun 2007
    vic
    249

    Morning all!
    Hi Starrysky- I found that as soon as I had a confirmed pregnancy, my GP referred my on to the Obgyn straight away for all care. Personally I prefer this, as I'd much rather be dealing with the experts anyway. I've been lucky too, as even though I'm in public, and there are only two obgyns here at our hospital, they've been awesome. I think because of the problems I've had, its been nice to have the same doctors at each appointment, who know me, know my history etc.
    My gyn has told me to get a referral for an early scan from her as soon as I know Im preg, to put my mind at ease, which is good too. Generally they'll help with Bts etc to put you at ease after an MC.

  9. #9
    Registered User

    Jun 2007
    vic
    249

    Hi Treelo, glad you're feeling better and got in a qick Bd too. On that subject, and ignore me if it's too personal, but how often is the accepted thing? I mean do you guys only aim for around O, or do you chuck in a few extra goes at random just in case? I don't know if or when I will O this month, so i thought we'd get going from here on in, I'm at CD 6. I thought I'd aim for at least every 2nd day for the next week, and a couple extra at around cd14. Does this sound right?

  10. #10
    Registered User
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    Aug 2007
    adelaide
    1,989

    treelo so happy to hear all is well! i couldnt get on here last night, never thought i would become so addicted!
    beaksie i might have said before, the hospital did not want to see me until 16 weeks, my gp was totally disinterested, he said he would leave it all to the hospital (b/ts, pap smear etc) i have only recently moved suburbs, so he was a new gp but i was really surprised at his total lack of concern, havent been back after the m/c, do you think i should see someone seeing as its been 2 weeks since, i have not had any probs but........
    anyway just out of curiosity, is your name rebecca or beck or something?
    only thing i was worried about being referred to obgyn is the gap cost, being public patient and all that, im going to have to look in to private.
    i did a hpt this morning just to see what would happen, had the faintest of faint lines, not even sure if its not just my imagination, i guess this would be the remains of hormones from m/c? still bleeding lightly but am getting sore bbs, hopefully af is just around the corner!

  11. #11
    Registered User

    Jun 2007
    vic
    249

    Hi Starrysky, yes, Im Bec. Wondering about the cost thing. I'm a public patient (as I said), and I've never paid a single cent for any hospital visit I've had, except for ultrasounds done by sonographer (as opposed to Obs). I've been an outpatient for a while, and it's my inderstanding that if you are referred, all is free. I had an emergency CSwith DD and that was all covered too. I live in a remote town with few health options, maybe this is why? With your faint line, hope its a BFP but Hcg levels can take quite a few weeks to leave your system, so this may be the cause? Id find a better GP by the way!!

  12. #12
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    Aug 2007
    adelaide
    1,989

    hi ems i do think i will suss out the private options , i know of one obgyn who i saw a few years back who was fab, hopefully with dps new business going well, we can afford to him.
    hey again beaksiegreat name! my name is bec too! i just wondered because all my uncles used to call me beaky when i was a kid, i really dont know much about the whole hospital pregnancy thing, this was my first experience, not one i would ever wish on anyone........
    i will have to look into if i can be referred to a obgyn at the hospital, according to my pregnancy record book, i would not have seen a doctor until the day i was to deliver.
    i doubt it is a bfp, i dont think i have even o'd yet, but i suppose its possible.

  13. #13
    zionsmom Guest

    I just realized that I didn't give a proper CONGRATS to Sharon!!!!! I am so jealous! Not a bad kind just a little envious kind where I want to rub your belly and give myself some luck!

  14. #14
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    Aug 2007
    adelaide
    1,989

    hello zionsmum !
    last night i think the bb server went down, i was in the middle of answering a question for you littlescottishboy i know you asked lasand i dont want to step on any toes but i work in a pharmacy so i thought i could help
    baby aspirin in aus is low dose aspirin like astrix or cartia and is only 100mg, you can buy them over the counter for about $4 but i do recall my boss saying that taking aspirin in pregnancy was not recommended unless directed by your doc.
    xx

  15. #15
    Registered User

    Mar 2007
    outer South East Melbourne
    2,881

    Hi everyone,

    Starrysky - you are right about the low dose aspirin. Lots of docs advise not to take aspirin at all because it will increase your bleeding if you have a miscarriage.... so you should only do it if the doc recommends it. Next time you get pg I would recommend seeing a gp straight away. That's what I did last time and I had my HCG level checked on that day. When I went back for the result it was low at 20 but the gp was happy with anything above 5 but when I showed concern (I knew from all my research I should've been about 50 by then) she sent me for another BT 4 days later which showed it had halved. I miscarried the day I got the results. Once you get your first HCG result it should double every 2 to 3 days. If it doesn't problems lie ahead. I will also be getting my progesterone level checked as well next time around. My GP is at a bulk billing clinic and was happy to send me for the tests and even marked them urgent. It's been 2.5 weeks since the m/c (so 3.5 weeks since the first test) and I still haven't received a bill for the tests so I'm hoping they were free. If they had come back doubled she would've referred me on to an ob/gyn of my choice. They either refer you direct to a hospital or an ob/gyn in Victoria. I saw one after my second m/c and I was only out of pocket $65 so don't worry about the cost, it's not that bad at all. Most women under 35 who have had 1 or 2 m/c will go on to have a healthy pregnancy without any treatment at all so do not stress about increased risks. It's only after that age that the risks start rising.

    las - congratulations on ovulating.....I wonder what caused that????

    treelo - sorry about your hubby the other night... sometimes they have no idea.

    Beaksie - I know what you mean, I don't think I'd want to live with me for the first couple of months after a m/c.

    Curl - I don't remember feeling like that, but we all handle things differently. I'm sure it will be different next time.



    2DPO for me now which means AF should be on her way in about 10 days. I'm not really hoping for a BFP this cycle as I think it would be less stressful to get a BFN until I get the lap. The last few days have been quite difficult - I have had so many symptoms like I had when I was pregnant recently even though I know there's no way I'm pregnant. I hate what my mind is capable of doing. Bleeding gums, headache, vivid dreams, restless sleep, feeling off, pimples, frequent urination, having to get up in the night to pee.... no BB symptoms though which is a relief. I'm sure all this will disappear in a couple of days, I think it's just the change in hormone levels that comes with Oing that does it.

  16. #16
    Registered User
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    Aug 2007
    adelaide
    1,989

    thanx satya, i think what you said about the hormones and ovulating is right, i have been having the same kind of symptoms, which is sort of what led me to do the hpt this morning.

  17. #17
    Registered User

    Jul 2007
    122

    Thanx StarrySky and Satya for the aspirin info. I guess i am just trying to cover all bases, not knowing why i have had the m/c's. I am taking Vitamin E now which thins blood also so i think i'd better stay away from aspirin... my blood will be so thin it will probably disappear! haha.

    SO tired tonight... work is just full-on and Angus is so much work at the moment. Can't wait for the w/end - i am going to attempt my first ever abstract canvas painting! (actually, my first painting - ever!).

    Satya - i agree, i hate what the mind is capable of doing. My mind dreams up the most annoying things sometimes!

    Zionsmum -if you get any luck from rubbing Sharon's tum can you please share some. Thanx.

    Ems - thanx for the hug for my mum. I'll give it to her in person next time i see her. And how exciting for you about your wedding!!!! It will be the most beautiful day of your life, i just know it!

    Hi treelo, curl, beaksie, lizjessie, nellsbells and i'm sure i've forgotten someone ... ah ha, that's right, You! (insert name here)!!!

    As for me, still in TWW, but i think i O'd on day 19 this time so AF should be ages away... just trying to keep busy and not think about it.

    Have a great sleep everyone - i love sleep.

  18. #18
    Registered User
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    Jun 2007
    Western Australia
    6,587

    ems - I'm really glad AF has arrived - and I think she's leaving me too! woot!
    Now it's just count down to BDing

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